u/TangerineFew6830

Looking for advice from parents with experience of autism/ADHD/PDA-type profiles in primary-aged children.
My child is currently under CAMHS referral and we’re also having a meeting with school to discuss his presentation and support needs.
The main difficulty is extreme impulsivity and emotional dysregulation, especially in social situations. He can act very quickly without apparent inhibition, struggle with accepting boundaries, and sometimes says or does things that upset other children during play (e.g. unkind comments, disruptive or controlling behaviour in group play).
I’m also noticing a pattern where peers are starting to avoid him socially, and school are beginning to document concerns about peer relationships.
At home, boundaries can trigger very intense reactions very quickly, and once escalated he struggles to calm down or reflect on what’s happened.
We are waiting for CAMHS input, but I feel quite overwhelmed in the meantime and unsure what strategies actually help with this level of impulsivity and social difficulty.
Has anyone had similar experiences, particularly with children who struggle with both regulation and peer relationships, and found anything that made a difference long term (school strategies, parenting approaches, or interventions)?
hes not a bully, but the impact is the same on the children, he does not get invited to parties, kids flinch when close to him, he points and laughs at children in distress.
sadly, where all his behaviours are so impulsive, nothing sticks no amount of parenting.

My 5 YO has very complex autism & pathological demand avoidance (not necessarily in demands but rooted in autonomy, very extremely)

Life is extremely difficult & things become worse as he gets older, I have tried to fight the battles for the EHCP, school support & so on & have done everything correctly, but feel I am getting nowhere.

My child is really troubled honestly, violent, unkind and extremely anxious.

I have little capacity for work mentally, with my efforts going there rather than on my child. He is very complicated and layered & it requires time, energy, extreme patience to even start to deal with him.

He keeps refusing school, im getting many calls from the school, he is suspected dyslexic & work are getting pissed off with me, the pressure to not let them down, means I am not 100% being there for my child, as in, having to force him to school when he’s extremely anxious, because i HAVE to be at work.

I worry about his mental health as he gets older, if i cannot put 100% into parenting him in a way that reflects his additional needs, and we do not have any support.
I dont want him to grow up to be a dangerous, or anxious, depressed adult.

Right now, it feels peak time to get learning in place catered to his regulation, but I need to be on the ball ALL of the time, calm and ready to fully understand him & create a lifestyle where our family can be happy.

I am looking for anyone’s experience in doing this, its sad for me, but hes my child & he needs me

So I have a 5 YO (ASD & PDA) things seem to become worse as he gets older, more school calls, behind curriculum, and then the dreaded teacher change.

My 4 YO is starting school soon.

Both receive DLA for different reasons.

I work part time in asylum services (safeguarding, housing & money) its pretty dead end, as my kids mean i cant go up, going up in itself is very minimal pay rise. Its stressful, doing a job where i help people, but in actual fact, not really at all.

My child is a nightmare most mornings, evenings are worse.

I feel drained, energy lost in work - when i get my child i am at capacity, have no help at all, so it can take upwards of a bloody year to do one project in the house, I can never keep it clean, dinner is HELL as i cant leave my child alone to make it, the bloody appointments, school holidays, sickness

I am doing university from home too

Has anyone else made this leap?