They shut down hard feelings or often change the subject. It is like a wall getting to these people because they refuse to show any other difficult emotion. They constantly put on fake happiness and optimism and it feels so fake.
I know NYC is expensive but I’m wondering if a new start will help me. What was your experience like moving from NOVA to NYC?
Recently, I don’t see a future where I am alive nor do I see prospects of a brighter future. I also struggle with eating and my appetite has gone down considerably. This has caused me to feel very low energy.
I felt like I was alone in my struggles and no one tried to be my friend. I also felt like I wouldn’t be accepted as a non-binary person. I eventually left and decided not to return.
And feel more comfortable when I dress more androgynously. Religion has made me feel like women don’t have a say or voice in anything. I see the women not being able to hold leadership roles and often have to dress modestly. It feels like Christianity supports sexism tbh.
I feel more alone when I’m in a room full of people than when I’m by myself. I also find people draining.
It made my mental health worse. The fact that I have to put in effort and try to get guys to like me?? Is honestly dehumanizing.
I can’t wait for winter.
Lately, I’ve been feeling I am wasting my life away. I have no friends or future goals. I have struggled with depression for most of my life and often fantasize about ending it. My thoughts have not improved even as a Christian and I’m not sure what to do. I’m not even sure if God will heal me from my depression because I feel worse being around church people at times and the church trauma I atruggle with.
I struggle with suicidal thoughts every day and lately I’ve been thinking of giving up on life because of how unfulfilling and depressing it is. I’m not sure if I will go to hell if I do and I don’t want to hurt my family, but the temptation is strong. I also am a Christian but do not believe in a lot of the conservative values they have. I do support legalized suicide.