u/TiareMBC

I always hated going to my dad’s mother’s house. To make things easier, I will call her grandma for this, but I don’t see her as such.

To this day, I can’t tell you who hated whom more. But there is a big difference, I was a kid and she was a grown woman. In front of my parents, she acted the role of the loving grandma. Her lies weave a story of a clumsy girl who loved to play at her house. And me, terrified of what would happen if I said otherwise, agreed with her wonderful tales of how I got new bruises and cuts.

The one thing that kept me going was that my stays with her were only temporary. At most, I stayed a few hours with her, waiting for my parents to get out of work or come back from their date night. 

But during one of their date nights, they never came back. No one knows who did it, but someone cut the brakes. They never made it to the restaurant, and the only place they had been to before that was grandma’s house. In the end, it was considered a freak accident, even though everything said it was anything but. 

When my maternal grandma offered to take me in, I felt some relief in my ocean of grief. This relief was short-lived, as grandma fought to keep me and won by saying I would have more normalcy with her and that unlike my maternal side, I had many cousins to grow up with and aunts and uncles to spoil me. My maternal grandma had no other children besides my mother, and no extended family to offer. My opinion on the matter was irrelevant to the court, so I was never asked, and I ended up with my paternal grandma.

“You will pay for everything,” she smiled as she looked down on me the first day I was there.

I trembled at her words. Knowing she would make me pay for whatever she thought I was at fault for. I won’t talk about all the horrors this woman made me go through, and how everyone turned a blind eye to it, except for the shed.

Outside the house, in the perfectly kept garden, there was a small shed. It was full of equipment, not insulated, and according to her, that’s where the monster lived. Any time she got tired of me, she would lock me in there and say she hoped this time the monster would eat me.

By the time I was living with her, I no longer believed in said monster. I had already realized that she was the real monster. Still, I was 8, had just lost my parents, and the last thing I wanted was to be alone in that shed. Any company would be better than the empty shed.

So that night, when she dragged me there, I screamed my lungs out, begging her to let me sleep in the house, knowing the consequences I would face in the morning for screaming too loudly when people could hear me.

“Please grandma! I want to be inside with you!” I cried.

She didn’t answer back. Instead, she gave me a smug look that quickly contorted to anger once more. She pushed me inside the shed and closed the door without a second glance. 

I wanted to cry, but the tears never came. Instead, I moved some shredders and made sure no spiders were in there. I thought of lying down and sleeping, but instead I got up, angry, wanting to hit something, break things, just feel something other than sadness and fear. But as I was about to hit the wall, I heard something, or someone, and I froze.

“Please, don’t hurt yourself,” the voice of a girl came from the darkest part of the shed, “Please, it hurts a lot.”

Small pale hands with ruptured knuckles came out of the darkness. I tried to back away, but there wasn’t anywhere to back away into. I couldn’t take my eyes off those hands. Those tiny hands that matched mine in size. So broken, full of unhealed gashes and bruises. And when I finally looked up, there she stood, looking at me in as much surprise as I felt.

“You see me,” she whispered.

“I do. But who are you? What’s your name?” I asked. The fear I had felt a few seconds ago had turned to curiosity. 

“I don’t know,” the girl’s voice trembled as if she were about to cry.

“I know! What if we choose a name for you?” I said excitedly.

The girl looked at me and nodded. 

“I’m Laia, by the way,” I said as I extended my hand towards her. She slowly took my hands, but the moment she touched me, my heart started to race, dizziness led to nausea, and my vision blurred for a second, and then it was all back to normal.

“Are you ok?” She asked, concerned. 

“Yeah, I don’t know what happened,” I responded as I sat down, “Be careful when you sit down not to squish the spiders.

When she looked at me, I noticed something both familiar and strange. She had an eye freckle, just like my dad and me. After my classmates made fun of me, and said I had dirt in my eye, my mom explained that wasn’t the case. She told me that my dad loved me so much that he had given me a piece of him to carry with me.

”This is so cool! We both have the same eye freckle! Maybe we are sisters!” I said excitedly. 

“That would be nice,” she smiled.

“Oh! A name! I forgot! What about Iria? I think it’s really pretty,” I looked at her hopefully.

“I like it. Thank you,” she said as she went to hug me. The same feeling of dizziness as if the world had gone wrong came back the moment she touched me. I involuntarily shuddered, but hugged her anyway. I had decided at that moment that Iria was my sister and we would be the best of friends.

“I’m glad to have a sister,” she whispered.

“I’m glad to have one too,” I smiled. And for the first time, I didn’t hate the shed. I had found something I had always wanted and when morning came, I would tell her to come live with me. Grandma’s house wasn’t great, but together we could make it better.

I’m not sure when I fell asleep. All I remember was talking with Iria about all the cool things we could do together. I told her we could also go visit my maternal grandma, so she could experience having a nice grandma. Iria didn’t know how old she was, so we decided I would be the older sister, and as such, I had to make sure she was happy and safe.

“Get up! Hurry!” Aunt Manuela yelled at me. She lived next door with my three cousins and her always-wandering husband. 

“The social workers will be here soon so you better clean yourself up and behave! You know what happens if you don’t!” she threatened. I quickly got up and ran back to the house to shower and be ready to have my hair pulled into a perfect ponytail by her. Not obeying would mean no dinner and probably no breakfast either.

In my haste, I had forgotten about Iria. I showered extra quickly and put on the new clothes laid out for me and went outside to the shed. But when I opened it, she wasn’t there. I thought maybe she had gone home or something and went back inside the house to get my hair pulled.

The show went as usual. Grandma and Aunt Manuela doted on me and showed the social workers “my room” painted in what they said was my favorite color, pink. I hated pink. Aunt Manuela would call my cousins over to come and play with me while the adults talked with the social worker. Once the visit was over, things went back to normal. I no longer had access to the room, and my cousins weren’t allowed to play with me.

During the day, I was never sent to the shed. But now I wanted to go back there, and hopefully see Iria once more. That night, I wasn’t sent to the shed. Grandma was too happy with the visit and the continuous money she was getting from having to tolerate me. I didn’t sleep much, wondering if my little sister was doing ok.

“You are so ugly,” Regina pushed me to the ground. 

“No! I’m not!” I yelled back. I knew that if I touched her, I would get in so much trouble. 

“Yes, you are! My mommy said so, because you look like your ugly mother!” Regina mocked me. 

And I lost it. I didn’t care if she made fun of me, but no one made fun of my mom. I got up from the floor and I punched her directly in her nose, just like my mom had taught me. Blood splattered everywhere and she gave a loud shriek. 

“What did you do to my precious girl?” Aunt Estrella yelled from the house entrance. Her whale-like body tried to move quickly, but her feet could only go so quickly. Before reaching her daughter, she slapped me hard. I looked at her, terrified. But her focus was back on her wailing and blood-soaked daughter. I felt some relief until I felt grandma’s hand on my shoulder. When I looked up, she was smiling, and that was so much worse than anger.

Again, I won’t go much into detail as this isn’t what the story is about, but I did end with bruised hands after Aunt Estrella hit them repeatedly with a belt with grandma and Regina as witnesses. That night, I was dragged into the shed, to think about what I had done wrong.

I cried and cried, hating my life. But hating those people who had hurt me even more. I was so absorbed in my pain that I screamed when a gentle hand touched me. I immediately regretted it when I saw Iria jump back frightened.

“I’m sorry!” I moved towards Iria, “I didn’t know you were here.”

“Sorry, I saw you crying,” Iria moved to sit next to me, “Look, our hands now match.”

I wiped my tears, flinching at the pain, and smiled when I saw Iria smile. We sat there in silence for a while. I wanted to bring up an idea I had had for a while, but was scared to say out loud. But my idea of Iria coming to live inside the house wasn’t going to work, what if they hurt her too?

“Iria, let’s run away,” I said seriously and when I saw her freeze up, I kept going, “It’s ok. I can take care of you. I can steal some food and if we get to my grandma, I’m sure-“

“I can’t leave the shed,” Iria interrupted me.

“I can come during the day and open the door-“ I stopped as she shook her head.

“I can’t leave, I have tried,” Iria started to cry, “I have tried many times. I just can’t. Sorry, if you want to go…”

“No! I could never leave you!” I hugged her, “I will stay with you.”

Iria spoke but I didn’t understand a word she said. The world swirled around me, I felt lightheaded as everything started to become dark, and once more, everything was all right. I didn’t want to worry Iria, so I didn’t ask what she had said and just nodded.

“Besides, you don’t have to worry about Estrella for much longer,” Iria sat back down and started to draw on the floor with her finger.

“What do you mean that I don’t have to worry about Aunt Estrella?” I asked.

“She is going to die soon,” she said as she continued to draw on the floor.

“How do you know?” I asked as I started to draw on the floor too. The darkness in which I had first seen Iria emerge seemed to be creeping closer to us. I tried to back away but Iria was unbothered as it made contact with her finger.

“I don’t know,” Iria answered, “I just know.”

I didn’t ask anything else. Instead, I joined her once more to draw on the floor and smiled when I saw she had drawn us together. The rest of the night, we created a world of magic and happiness with our drawings.

Having Iria in my life did make things better. No matter what happened, what kind of beatings I took, or how much hunger I faced, I knew I would see her too. From time to time, I managed to sneak in the chalk colors my cousins left outside. We would draw inside the shed and erase everything before morning. 

A week later, we got the news that Aunt Estrella had died from a heart attack. She had been out eating burgers with Regina when she suddenly hit the floor and never got back up. Regina went to live with her father and I never had to see her again.

Grandma locked herself in her room, only coming out to eat whatever was not rotten in the fridge. As long as I avoided her during her outings, I didn’t have to worry about her beating me. Aunt Manuela came from time to time to check on her and yell at me to clean the house. Since I had no supervision, I would go to the shed at night and sneak in sandwiches for both of us.

I enjoyed my time with Iria and started to intentionally make grandma angry so she would send me to the shed. I didn’t care that she would hit me, or yell at me anymore because it meant I got to spend time with Iria.

One night, after grandma shut the door to the house, I turned to show Iria the bracelets I had made us from stolen beads and thread when I saw her rocking herself in the dark corner, crying. I approached her, but this time she flinched away from me. 

I wanted to get closer but the darkness scared me. It embraced Iria, I’m unsure if protecting her or trying to keep her as its own. But as Iria sobbed once more, I made my trembling legs move towards her. After all, I was the big sister and I had to take care of her.

As I hugged her, the usual dizziness took over, but this time it took a much stronger hold of my heart. I felt the air leave my lungs, and the darkness became heavy, too heavy for me to hold…

“NO!!!” Iria screamed.

And finally, I was able to breathe. The air in my lungs had never felt so good. I hadn’t noticed that I had peed myself and felt embarrassed. I sat up, covering myself as best as possible and hoping Iria couldn’t smell my soiled clothes.

“I’m sorry,” I managed to cough out. I wasn’t sure what I was apologizing for but felt like I had to.

“I don’t want you to die,” she cried.

The world became silent for a second. I couldn’t hear Iria’s cries, nor my own as I processed what she had just said. I was going to die. I was going to die, just like my mom and dad had. I wasn’t ready to die.

”Iria, I won’t die,” I said as I wiped the tears off my eyes, “I have to take care of you.”

I had dropped the bracelets in my trance but picked them up and handed one to Iria. I made sure to put the one heart-shaped bead on her bracelet. She took it, carefully, making sure not to touch me and put it on.

“I don’t want to lose you,” she cried, “I was alone for so long and finally I have you. I have a sister to talk with and have fun. I don’t want that to ever end.”

“Don’t worry, as long as we are both wearing these bracelets, we will always be together,” I tried to smile.

That night, we didn’t do much. We took turns crying, but as much as I tried to approach her, she never let me get close. 

I never knew when I fell asleep, but this time when I woke up, I felt a pang of sadness at not seeing Iria. While I knew better than to be crying when grandma or Aunt Manuela opened the shed, I couldn’t help myself but sob.

Grandma looked at me in disgust as she dragged me back inside the house. But right before making it in, she stopped as she felt something that shouldn’t have been on my wrist. I felt my feet lift from the ground as she lifted me from my arm to look at the bracelet with the stolen beads.

“You fucking thief! How dare you take the things of others! With all the things I give you and have sacrificed for you, you still dare to steal?” she yelled at me as she threw me inside the house.

I tried to respond but I couldn’t get a word out before she kicked me hard on my stomach. New tears ran down my face, but I ignored them as I tried to get away from her.

“It’s your fault my only son is gone! And you can’t even be a good daughter to honor him! I gave you a home when no one wanted you, and this is how you pay? By being a thief?!” she screamed as she went after me. 

I wasn’t sure where to go, but I knew I had to get away from her. As she continued to yell at me, I ran. I could hear the clap of her sandals on the floor, a noise that to this day still haunts me, as I tried to get away from her. 

Then, I felt something hard hit my head. I fell forward and saw blood running down my neck. Next to me was a heavy lamp that my dad had given her many years ago. I tried to get up, despite the world swimming around me, I didn’t want to die.

She grabbed my leg and started to drag me into the kitchen, I screamed for someone to help me, knowing the only one that would hear me was Aunt Manuela, and she would pretend everything was all right.

“I hate you. I hate seeing you every single day. I hate the way you look, the way you speak, and how you even move. But you know what? You need to pay for everything, and I have enjoyed this so much!” she said at me with a crazed face.

As I saw her grab the mallet, I managed to free myself from her. Maybe it was out of instinct, but I ran towards the shed. I didn’t want to die, and I didn’t know what to do. As I opened the door of the shed, grandma pulled at my hair but instantly froze when she looked inside.

“Iria! Help me!” I begged.

Grandma let go of my hair and I dropped to the floor. Her face contorted in terror. I didn’t know what was going on, but Iria looked at grandma with so much fury.

“This can’t be…” grandma’s voice trembled.

For the first time, Iria walked out of the shed, followed by the darkness that always embraced her. She walked directly to grandma and looked her in the eyes, she then grabbed the mallet and dropped it to the floor.

“It’s time,” Iria said calmly as she took hold of grandma’s hand.

I could see her shudder the way I did whenever I touched Iria, but unlike me, she tried to let go. But no matter how much she tried, Iria wouldn’t let her go, instead she was dragging her inside the shed and into the darkness.

Grandma screamed to be let go. Aunt Manuela came out running from her house and froze at the sight of Iria and grandma. Iria took one look at her, but went back to her task.

“Iria, what’s going on?” I asked, somehow feeling this would be the last time I saw her. Iria looked at me and smiled as she raised her hand with the bracelet.

“I think I was supposed to be the big sister after all. I will always be with you,” Iria said as she closed the door of the shed behind her. 

Aunt Manuela and I heard the screams of grandma inside, but neither of us moved until everything was silent. But when Aunt Manuela opened the shed, there was no one. The darkness that always filled the shed was gone alongside Iria and grandma.

There was no way to explain what happened, so when Aunt Manuela was asked about grandma, she just said that one day she was gone, to who knows where. When she was offered custody, she refused, saying she never wanted to see me again.

I went to live with my maternal grandma after the incident. And I could finally live life. I could be a child once more and enjoy being loved.

Years later, I learned that Iria’s real name had been Dolores, and she was my father’s oldest sister. Grandma had hated her and one day she went missing. Everyone assumed she was a rebellious child, but now I think I figured what had happened.

I am now a mother to a girl, born with the same freckle on her eye. I named her Iria, after the girl who was my friend, sister, and protector. I still wear the bracelet I made for us and hope that she knows I still think of her.

Now, as I look at my daughter, I understand what my mom has said about the freckle in our eyes. Because I couldn’t love anyone else more in the world, and now she gets to carry that love and that of those who came before us.

I always hated going to my dad’s mother’s house. To make things easier, I will call her grandma for this, but I don’t see her as such.

To this day, I can’t tell you who hated whom more. But there is a big difference, I was a kid and she was a grown woman. In front of my parents, she acted the role of the loving grandma. Her lies weave a story of a clumsy girl who loved to play at her house. And me, terrified of what would happen if I said otherwise, agreed with her wonderful tales of how I got new bruises and cuts.

The one thing that kept me going was that my stays with her were only temporary. At most, I stayed a few hours with her, waiting for my parents to get out of work or come back from their date night. 

But during one of their date nights, they never came back. No one knows who did it, but someone cut the brakes. They never made it to the restaurant, and the only place they had been to before that was grandma’s house. In the end, it was considered a freak accident, even though everything said it was anything but. 

When my maternal grandma offered to take me in, I felt some relief in my ocean of grief. This relief was short-lived, as grandma fought to keep me and won by saying I would have more normalcy with her and that unlike my maternal side, I had many cousins to grow up with and aunts and uncles to spoil me. My maternal grandma had no other children besides my mother, and no extended family to offer. My opinion on the matter was irrelevant to the court, so I was never asked, and I ended up with my paternal grandma.

“You will pay for everything,” she smiled as she looked down on me the first day I was there.

I trembled at her words. Knowing she would make me pay for whatever she thought I was at fault for. I won’t talk about all the horrors this woman made me go through, and how everyone turned a blind eye to it, except for the shed.

Outside the house, in the perfectly kept garden, there was a small shed. It was full of equipment, not insulated, and according to her, that’s where the monster lived. Any time she got tired of me, she would lock me in there and say she hoped this time the monster would eat me.

By the time I was living with her, I no longer believed in said monster. I had already realized that she was the real monster. Still, I was 8, had just lost my parents, and the last thing I wanted was to be alone in that shed. Any company would be better than the empty shed.

So that night, when she dragged me there, I screamed my lungs out, begging her to let me sleep in the house, knowing the consequences I would face in the morning for screaming too loudly when people could hear me.

“Please grandma! I want to be inside with you!” I cried.

She didn’t answer back. Instead, she gave me a smug look that quickly contorted to anger once more. She pushed me inside the shed and closed the door without a second glance. 

I wanted to cry, but the tears never came. Instead, I moved some shredders and made sure no spiders were in there. I thought of lying down and sleeping, but instead I got up, angry, wanting to hit something, break things, just feel something other than sadness and fear. But as I was about to hit the wall, I heard something, or someone, and I froze.

“Please, don’t hurt yourself,” the voice of a girl came from the darkest part of the shed, “Please, it hurts a lot.”

Small pale hands with ruptured knuckles came out of the darkness. I tried to back away, but there wasn’t anywhere to back away into. I couldn’t take my eyes off those hands. Those tiny hands that matched mine in size. So broken, full of unhealed gashes and bruises. And when I finally looked up, there she stood, looking at me in as much surprise as I felt.

“You see me,” she whispered.

“I do. But who are you? What’s your name?” I asked. The fear I had felt a few seconds ago had turned to curiosity. 

“I don’t know,” the girl’s voice trembled as if she were about to cry.

“I know! What if we choose a name for you?” I said excitedly.

The girl looked at me and nodded. 

“I’m Laia, by the way,” I said as I extended my hand towards her. She slowly took my hands, but the moment she touched me, my heart started to race, dizziness led to nausea, and my vision blurred for a second, and then it was all back to normal.

“Are you ok?” She asked, concerned. 

“Yeah, I don’t know what happened,” I responded as I sat down, “Be careful when you sit down not to squish the spiders.

When she looked at me, I noticed something both familiar and strange. She had an eye freckle, just like my dad and me. After my classmates made fun of me, and said I had dirt in my eye, my mom explained that wasn’t the case. She told me that my dad loved me so much that he had given me a piece of him to carry with me.

”This is so cool! We both have the same eye freckle! Maybe we are sisters!” I said excitedly. 

“That would be nice,” she smiled.

“Oh! A name! I forgot! What about Iria? I think it’s really pretty,” I looked at her hopefully.

“I like it. Thank you,” she said as she went to hug me. The same feeling of dizziness as if the world had gone wrong came back the moment she touched me. I involuntarily shuddered, but hugged her anyway. I had decided at that moment that Iria was my sister and we would be the best of friends.

“I’m glad to have a sister,” she whispered.

“I’m glad to have one too,” I smiled. And for the first time, I didn’t hate the shed. I had found something I had always wanted and when morning came, I would tell her to come live with me. Grandma’s house wasn’t great, but together we could make it better.

I’m not sure when I fell asleep. All I remember was talking with Iria about all the cool things we could do together. I told her we could also go visit my maternal grandma, so she could experience having a nice grandma. Iria didn’t know how old she was, so we decided I would be the older sister, and as such, I had to make sure she was happy and safe.

“Get up! Hurry!” Aunt Manuela yelled at me. She lived next door with my three cousins and her always-wandering husband. 

“The social workers will be here soon so you better clean yourself up and behave! You know what happens if you don’t!” she threatened. I quickly got up and ran back to the house to shower and be ready to have my hair pulled into a perfect ponytail by her. Not obeying would mean no dinner and probably no breakfast either.

In my haste, I had forgotten about Iria. I showered extra quickly and put on the new clothes laid out for me and went outside to the shed. But when I opened it, she wasn’t there. I thought maybe she had gone home or something and went back inside the house to get my hair pulled.

The show went as usual. Grandma and Aunt Manuela doted on me and showed the social workers “my room” painted in what they said was my favorite color, pink. I hated pink. Aunt Manuela would call my cousins over to come and play with me while the adults talked with the social worker. Once the visit was over, things went back to normal. I no longer had access to the room, and my cousins weren’t allowed to play with me.

During the day, I was never sent to the shed. But now I wanted to go back there, and hopefully see Iria once more. That night, I wasn’t sent to the shed. Grandma was too happy with the visit and the continuous money she was getting from having to tolerate me. I didn’t sleep much, wondering if my little sister was doing ok.

“You are so ugly,” Regina pushed me to the ground. 

“No! I’m not!” I yelled back. I knew that if I touched her, I would get in so much trouble. 

“Yes, you are! My mommy said so, because you look like your ugly mother!” Regina mocked me. 

And I lost it. I didn’t care if she made fun of me, but no one made fun of my mom. I got up from the floor and I punched her directly in her nose, just like my mom had taught me. Blood splattered everywhere and she gave a loud shriek. 

“What did you do to my precious girl?” Aunt Estrella yelled from the house entrance. Her whale-like body tried to move quickly, but her feet could only go so quickly. Before reaching her daughter, she slapped me hard. I looked at her, terrified. But her focus was back on her wailing and blood-soaked daughter. I felt some relief until I felt grandma’s hand on my shoulder. When I looked up, she was smiling, and that was so much worse than anger.

Again, I won’t go much into detail as this isn’t what the story is about, but I did end with bruised hands after Aunt Estrella hit them repeatedly with a belt with grandma and Regina as witnesses. That night, I was dragged into the shed, to think about what I had done wrong.

I cried and cried, hating my life. But hating those people who had hurt me even more. I was so absorbed in my pain that I screamed when a gentle hand touched me. I immediately regretted it when I saw Iria jump back frightened.

“I’m sorry!” I moved towards Iria, “I didn’t know you were here.”

“Sorry, I saw you crying,” Iria moved to sit next to me, “Look, our hands now match.”

I wiped my tears, flinching at the pain, and smiled when I saw Iria smile. We sat there in silence for a while. I wanted to bring up an idea I had had for a while, but was scared to say out loud. But my idea of Iria coming to live inside the house wasn’t going to work, what if they hurt her too?

“Iria, let’s run away,” I said seriously and when I saw her freeze up, I kept going, “It’s ok. I can take care of you. I can steal some food and if we get to my grandma, I’m sure-“

“I can’t leave the shed,” Iria interrupted me.

“I can come during the day and open the door-“ I stopped as she shook her head.

“I can’t leave, I have tried,” Iria started to cry, “I have tried many times. I just can’t. Sorry, if you want to go…”

“No! I could never leave you!” I hugged her, “I will stay with you.”

Iria spoke but I didn’t understand a word she said. The world swirled around me, I felt lightheaded as everything started to become dark, and once more, everything was all right. I didn’t want to worry Iria, so I didn’t ask what she had said and just nodded.

“Besides, you don’t have to worry about Estrella for much longer,” Iria sat back down and started to draw on the floor with her finger.

“What do you mean that I don’t have to worry about Aunt Estrella?” I asked.

“She is going to die soon,” she said as she continued to draw on the floor.

“How do you know?” I asked as I started to draw on the floor too. The darkness in which I had first seen Iria emerge seemed to be creeping closer to us. I tried to back away but Iria was unbothered as it made contact with her finger.

“I don’t know,” Iria answered, “I just know.”

I didn’t ask anything else. Instead, I joined her once more to draw on the floor and smiled when I saw she had drawn us together. The rest of the night, we created a world of magic and happiness with our drawings.

Having Iria in my life did make things better. No matter what happened, what kind of beatings I took, or how much hunger I faced, I knew I would see her too. From time to time, I managed to sneak in the chalk colors my cousins left outside. We would draw inside the shed and erase everything before morning. 

A week later, we got the news that Aunt Estrella had died from a heart attack. She had been out eating burgers with Regina when she suddenly hit the floor and never got back up. Regina went to live with her father and I never had to see her again.

Grandma locked herself in her room, only coming out to eat whatever was not rotten in the fridge. As long as I avoided her during her outings, I didn’t have to worry about her beating me. Aunt Manuela came from time to time to check on her and yell at me to clean the house. Since I had no supervision, I would go to the shed at night and sneak in sandwiches for both of us.

I enjoyed my time with Iria and started to intentionally make grandma angry so she would send me to the shed. I didn’t care that she would hit me, or yell at me anymore because it meant I got to spend time with Iria.

One night, after grandma shut the door to the house, I turned to show Iria the bracelets I had made us from stolen beads and thread when I saw her rocking herself in the dark corner, crying. I approached her, but this time she flinched away from me. 

I wanted to get closer but the darkness scared me. It embraced Iria, I’m unsure if protecting her or trying to keep her as its own. But as Iria sobbed once more, I made my trembling legs move towards her. After all, I was the big sister and I had to take care of her.

As I hugged her, the usual dizziness took over, but this time it took a much stronger hold of my heart. I felt the air leave my lungs, and the darkness became heavy, too heavy for me to hold…

“NO!!!” Iria screamed.

And finally, I was able to breathe. The air in my lungs had never felt so good. I hadn’t noticed that I had peed myself and felt embarrassed. I sat up, covering myself as best as possible and hoping Iria couldn’t smell my soiled clothes.

“I’m sorry,” I managed to cough out. I wasn’t sure what I was apologizing for but felt like I had to.

“I don’t want you to die,” she cried.

The world became silent for a second. I couldn’t hear Iria’s cries, nor my own as I processed what she had just said. I was going to die. I was going to die, just like my mom and dad had. I wasn’t ready to die.

”Iria, I won’t die,” I said as I wiped the tears off my eyes, “I have to take care of you.”

I had dropped the bracelets in my trance but picked them up and handed one to Iria. I made sure to put the one heart-shaped bead on her bracelet. She took it, carefully, making sure not to touch me and put it on.

“I don’t want to lose you,” she cried, “I was alone for so long and finally I have you. I have a sister to talk with and have fun. I don’t want that to ever end.”

“Don’t worry, as long as we are both wearing these bracelets, we will always be together,” I tried to smile.

That night, we didn’t do much. We took turns crying, but as much as I tried to approach her, she never let me get close. 

I never knew when I fell asleep, but this time when I woke up, I felt a pang of sadness at not seeing Iria. While I knew better than to be crying when grandma or Aunt Manuela opened the shed, I couldn’t help myself but sob.

Grandma looked at me in disgust as she dragged me back inside the house. But right before making it in, she stopped as she felt something that shouldn’t have been on my wrist. I felt my feet lift from the ground as she lifted me from my arm to look at the bracelet with the stolen beads.

“You fucking thief! How dare you take the things of others! With all the things I give you and have sacrificed for you, you still dare to steal?” she yelled at me as she threw me inside the house.

I tried to respond but I couldn’t get a word out before she kicked me hard on my stomach. New tears ran down my face, but I ignored them as I tried to get away from her.

“It’s your fault my only son is gone! And you can’t even be a good daughter to honor him! I gave you a home when no one wanted you, and this is how you pay? By being a thief?!” she screamed as she went after me. 

I wasn’t sure where to go, but I knew I had to get away from her. As she continued to yell at me, I ran. I could hear the clap of her sandals on the floor, a noise that to this day still haunts me, as I tried to get away from her. 

Then, I felt something hard hit my head. I fell forward and saw blood running down my neck. Next to me was a heavy lamp that my dad had given her many years ago. I tried to get up, despite the world swimming around me, I didn’t want to die.

She grabbed my leg and started to drag me into the kitchen, I screamed for someone to help me, knowing the only one that would hear me was Aunt Manuela, and she would pretend everything was all right.

“I hate you. I hate seeing you every single day. I hate the way you look, the way you speak, and how you even move. But you know what? You need to pay for everything, and I have enjoyed this so much!” she said at me with a crazed face.

As I saw her grab the mallet, I managed to free myself from her. Maybe it was out of instinct, but I ran towards the shed. I didn’t want to die, and I didn’t know what to do. As I opened the door of the shed, grandma pulled at my hair but instantly froze when she looked inside.

“Iria! Help me!” I begged.

Grandma let go of my hair and I dropped to the floor. Her face contorted in terror. I didn’t know what was going on, but Iria looked at grandma with so much fury.

“This can’t be…” grandma’s voice trembled.

For the first time, Iria walked out of the shed, followed by the darkness that always embraced her. She walked directly to grandma and looked her in the eyes, she then grabbed the mallet and dropped it to the floor.

“It’s time,” Iria said calmly as she took hold of grandma’s hand.

I could see her shudder the way I did whenever I touched Iria, but unlike me, she tried to let go. But no matter how much she tried, Iria wouldn’t let her go, instead she was dragging her inside the shed and into the darkness.

Grandma screamed to be let go. Aunt Manuela came out running from her house and froze at the sight of Iria and grandma. Iria took one look at her, but went back to her task.

“Iria, what’s going on?” I asked, somehow feeling this would be the last time I saw her. Iria looked at me and smiled as she raised her hand with the bracelet.

“I think I was supposed to be the big sister after all. I will always be with you,” Iria said as she closed the door of the shed behind her. 

Aunt Manuela and I heard the screams of grandma inside, but neither of us moved until everything was silent. But when Aunt Manuela opened the shed, there was no one. The darkness that always filled the shed was gone alongside Iria and grandma.

There was no way to explain what happened, so when Aunt Manuela was asked about grandma, she just said that one day she was gone, to who knows where. When she was offered custody, she refused, saying she never wanted to see me again.

I went to live with my maternal grandma after the incident. And I could finally live life. I could be a child once more and enjoy being loved.

Years later, I learned that Iria’s real name had been Dolores, and she was my father’s oldest sister. Grandma had hated her and one day she went missing. Everyone assumed she was a rebellious child, but now I think I figured what had happened.

I am now a mother to a girl, born with the same freckle on her eye. I named her Iria, after the girl who was my friend, sister, and protector. I still wear the bracelet I made for us and hope that she knows I still think of her.

Now, as I look at my daughter, I understand what my mom has said about the freckle in our eyes. Because I couldn’t love anyone else more in the world, and now she gets to carry that love and that of those who came before us.

What I am about to write is a warning for anyone who finds the hacienda in the middle of nowhere. If you do, leave before the sunset.

My dad was an adventurer at heart, always trying to find a new place to explore, new people to talk with, and new food to eat. One day, he found a hacienda on top of a steep hill covered by large trees. The place was very well hidden, which only made my dad more curious. 

He set out to explore what he presumed was an abandoned place. But out came an old man, Don Pepe, yelling at my dad to go away. My dad had the ability to make friends with everyone and Don Pepe wasn’t an exception. He helped Don Pepe around with the farm animals, and before leaving, he promised to come back from time to time.

My mom and I would accompany him to visit Don Pepe once or twice a year. The place was beautiful, still is, and I got to play with all the animals as my parents enjoyed the time in what looked to be paradise. But Don Pepe had a rule, we had to leave before the sun went down, no exceptions.

Except one day, when we went to visit, Don Pepe looked more tired than usual and went to sleep before we left. We were all concerned and stayed the night to take care of him. 

In the middle of the night, we heard loud screams. My mom covered my eyes, but I managed to see Don Pepe’s dismembered hand and the goat that quickly took it and ran off with it. Don Pepe claimed it was an accident as he chopped wood, which didn’t make sense but he wouldn’t budge. My parents tried to convince him to go to the hospital, but he refused and told us to leave in the morning.

We continued to visit from time to time. I loved his home, with all the animals and the large forest that surrounded it. Besides that terrible night, I had nothing but fond memories.

On one of my dad’s surprise visits to Don Pepe, he was the one that ended up with the unpleasant surprise. By the state of decomposition, it was presumed that Don Pepe had been dead for a few weeks. Again, surprisingly enough, the farm animals had not touched his body.

He might have known he was dying because he left a will, giving my dad the hacienda. But there was one condition, that he sell it immediately. He also wrote to not worry about the animals, they were being taken care of. We were all confused about this last part, but my dad noted that the animals still looked healthy when he had found Don Pepe.

While my dad was saddened by the loss of Don Pepe and the hacienda, he decided to respect his wishes. But right before selling the hacienda, he proposed that the whole family stay one night to enjoy the hacienda one last time.

And so, we made the hour and a half drive from Mexicali to the hacienda, with all my aunts following behind us. I will say, I have no idea how my dad managed to get our car up that hill. The old Prius cried every time he accelerated. My mom and I looked at each other, worried that this would be the time the car gave up and we rolled down the hill to our death. But somehow, the car made it all the way up, and we all gave a sigh of relief.

My aunts didn’t believe in their cars as much as my dad did in ours and decided to park down the hill. Javi, my cousin, then helped all our aunts up the hill.

“I’m not sure how you got all of our aunts up here,” I joked.

“I’m not sure how your dad got that poor car up here,” he responded out of breath, “This place better be worth it.”

“Trust me, it is,” I answered. And I meant it. He still couldn't see it because of the large trees hiding the hacienda. But this place was beautiful. The hacienda stood out but also somehow belonged with the forest. Its talavera floor that extended through the whole property made me feel like I was walking through a magical castle. Instead of having an abrupt end, the floor blended with the garden which extended towards the farm to one side, and the forest to the other.

“This place looks fucking awesome!” Javi said excitedly after we got past the trees, “I know we are having a big family meal today but tomorrow we should go out to explore.”

“Sounds good to me, but while everyone gets set up, let me take you to the farm,” I said as I guided him towards the stalls.

As we passed the animals, I called them all by names. Don Pepe had named every single one of them, and would sometimes allow me to name some. But as we neared the goats, I saw one of them was tied outside, separated from the rest. I quickly got to the large brown goat and untied him.

“Bubbles, go be free!” I patted the goat as it quickly took off towards the forest.

“You know they’re just going to pick a new goat for dinner right? And isn’t it going to get lost?” Javi stared at Bubbles as he disappeared into the forest.

“I’m just going to pretend I didn’t hear the dinner part but Bubbles should be fine. The goats know where to go and how to come back.” I responded.

The rest of the day we spent it with our families. We had dinner, and I didn’t check what goat was chosen, we told stories and just had a good time overall. It truly was an amazing day, but all good things come to an end.

“Xochi, do you want to share a bedroom?” Javi asked, concerned. I had a tendency of sleepwalking, but it hadn’t been an issue recently. 

“It’s fine, I can sleep on my own. Plus you snore loud as hell,” I laughed.

“Dude, you haven’t heard your snores. But fine, I’m still sleeping in the room next door,” Javi pointed to his room.

“Sounds good. Goodnight, Javi.”

“Goodnight, Xochi.”

That night, I had strange dreams. Red eyes gleamed at the edge of the forest. A low growl warned of what was to come. I wanted to move, but I was frozen in place. I screamed for help, but my voice was eaten by the void. And before I knew it, I was awake.

”Fuck!” I said out loud as I realized it was way too bright to be in my bedroom. I felt a searing pain on my leg and realized I was laying down by an ant hill and the ants had started to bite on one of my legs. 

I scrambled to my feet as I tried to remove the ants crawling up my legs. I quickly realized that whenever the heck I was, I had walked barefoot.

I looked around me, and honestly, the view was spectacular. I had miraculously not walked off a cliff and I could see from there a small river that cut through the valley and the mountains. Behind me was the large forest, so dense that light didn’t touch the ground. I was scared, but I couldn’t deny the beauty around me.

“If I had just paid attention to my dad on how to navigate using the sun, I could probably get back,” I said to myself.

I had no idea how to get back. The hacienda was nowhere in sight but I couldn’t have walked too far, right? I was still trying to decide how to get back to the hacienda when I felt something hit my back. I stumbled back, unsure of what had just touched me when I saw Bubbles.

“Thank goodness it’s you and not a mountain lion,” I said as I hugged Bubbles.

I felt some relief because I knew that at some point Bubbles would walk back to the hacienda and I could follow. 

Bubbles gave me one more nudge and headed towards the forest. I followed behind, not wanting to lose sight of him. 

As we made our path back to the hacienda, I cursed at myself for not wearing shoes in my sleep. I could feel rocks, roots, and I don’t know what else cut through the flesh of my feet. One look at my feet confirmed my suspicion that my feet were bleeding and bruised. Every step forward became more painful, but I had to keep going. 

Hours passed and my worry grew knowing my family was probably out there looking for me. They might have even called the rangers already. At some point I had to hold on to Bubbles to be able to walk. As anxious as I was to get back to the hacienda, there was something that was bothering me even more. Why was the forest so quiet? There should have been the sound of birds, or squirrels moving around, but there was nothing. And it might have been due to my nightmare, but I had the feeling that we were being followed. I looked behind me several times, but the only thing behind us was a trail of my blood.

As the day was reaching its end, we finally made it to the hacienda.

“Thank you so much Bubbles! I will make sure you never become dinner!” I hugged Bubbles as I opened the door to the goat’s stable.

I was glad to be back. There was no way I would have found my way back without Bubbles. But now the silence I had experienced in the forest extended to the hacienda. 

I told myself it was quiet because people were out there looking for me. I wasn’t sure how I would let them know I was back, but for now I would go take care of my feet.

I was limping across the farm and into the hacienda when a putrid smell hit me. My empty stomach twisted with revulsion, but luckily, I had nothing to vomit. As I looked around for the source of the smell, I saw the animals frantically eating their feed. I wasn’t sure what they were given, but it looked disgusting.

I decided to keep on going but then something caught my attention inside the chicken coop. There was something shiny, and against my better judgment, I went to check. I covered my nose, but the pungent smell of the feed seemed to go through my skin. And then I recognized what the shiny thing was, it was my mom’s ring. I ignored my disgust at the feed and used my free hand to reach in for the ring but as I pulled it out, my mom’s finger was attached to it. I screamed as I let go of the severed finger and the chickens quickly went back to picking at it.

“MOM! DAD! Is anyone here?” I yelled, but the only noise was that of the animals eating.

I ignored the pain on my feet and made my way towards the hacienda. I first made my way to the entrance to see if the cars were still there. My heart dropped when I saw the Prius parked on the same spot and one look down the hill confirmed all the family was still here.

My body trembled from fear, and all I wanted to do was cry but this wasn’t the time for that. Not yet. And so, I ran towards the bedrooms, screaming and begging for someone to answer me.

Before I could process the image in front of me, I slipped on the floor. I started to heave as I saw I was covered in blood and chunks of meat that I didn’t want to identify. The once cream colored hacienda was not painted in red. I didn’t want to look, but no matter where I looked, there was blood. 

While many of the doors were open, the one where Javi had slept the previous night was still closed. I did my best to get up and walk towards the door.

“Javi? Are you there? Please, open the door!” I begged. “PLEASE, TELL ME YOU’RE IN THERE!”

Tears blurred my vision, and hope of finding someone alive was quickly diminishing. I was about to head to my parent’s room when I heard a growl. I turned around quickly but saw nothing. But that sense of being watched that I had felt in the forest was back. I thought my heart couldn’t go any faster but now it pounded so hard that I wondered if it would come out of my chest.

I didn’t know what to do, when someone covered my mouth and pulled me into a room. I was ready to fight when I saw it was Javi. Before I could speak, Javi put a hand over his mouth and shushed me. He then pointed towards some furniture and instructed me to move it towards the door.

We moved the furniture as quietly as possible. We could hear growls and the occasional scratching of the door. We held our breaths, hoping that whatever was outside, would think there was nothing and walk away. After a long moment of silence, I hugged Javi tightly.

“Do you have any idea what the hell is outside?” I whispered.

“I have no idea. I went out to look for you and when I can back to get help,” Javi stuttered as he started to cry, “I only managed to get into this room because… my mom…”

He couldn’t continue speaking and he didn’t need to. The blood outside this room was his mom’s. 

Javi cleared his throat and continued, “I didn’t get a good look at whatever those things are but they are huge. I have these,” he showed me two knives,” but I’m not sure if they would be useful at all against those things.”

“We need to get out of here, and see if anyone else is out there. We need to-“ I started to panic.

“Xochi, I don’t think there is anyone else, but if there is, our best option would be to get in one of the cars and go get help, but we don’t have any keys,” Javi tried to take another deep breath to calm himself down.

I wanted to argue with him that we should go and look for people, but he was right. If we died, who would help any other survivor?

“My parent’s room is two doors away. Maybe if we make a run for it, we can get the keys and run towards the car,” I said, trying to ignore a big flaw in my plan.

“Can you even run? I don’t think I have ever seen you run in our lives and much less with how mangled your feet are,” Javi looked at me concerned.

“I’ll be fine,” I tried to sound confident,” Besides, do we have any other choice?”

Javi didn’t argue with me, but we both knew there wasn’t much else we could do. We moved the furniture away from the door and waited until there were no noises outside. When we finally decided to open the door, we hoped the silence would be because whatever monster had been outside, had finally left, and not because it was waiting to pounce on us. 

We ran towards my parents’ room, searching everywhere for the keys. I did my best to ignore the dismembered body parts on the floor. Then I felt something hit my back and remembered we had left the door open. Luckily, it was Bubbles.

“Thank goodness it’s just you. I’m sorry we can’t take you with us, but I promise we will come back for all of you,” I said to Bubbles.

“Xochi! I found the keys! Let’s go!” Javi hurried me.

I waved at Bubbles as we headed out. Javi kept paced with me, and honestly I had no idea how I was standing, much less running. But then we heard loud steps and growls behind us. 

“Shit!”, we said in unison as we turned to see the monsters behind us. Impossibly large wolves were coming our way. Their dark fur blended with the shadows that were now forming as the sun made its way down. The red eyes that had stared at me in my dreams, were now looking at me once more. 

“Don’t stay with me! Get to the car and turn it on! I will catch up to you!” I yelled at Javi.

“Are you insane? I can’t-“ 

“GET IN THE CAR!” I gave him no choice, the wolves were already upon us and I wanted at least one of us to make it.

Javi reluctantly ran ahead of me. My hands trembled as I turned around, holding the knife in my hand. At the very least, I might serve as a distraction. But the wolves just passed by me and went directly to Javi.

“NO!!!!” I screamed.

But the wolves caught up to him just as he was about to make it to the car. He screamed as the wolves tackled him to the ground. He used his knife to stab at their paws but the knife went through them without causing harm.

As I looked at him, and then to the setting sun, I understood what I had to do. I crawled by way to the nearest wood stump and put my left hand on it, and with my right, I helf up the knife.

“I know what you need! But let him go!” I yelled at the wolves.

Just wolves stopped. Javi still struggled under them, but the wolves now stared at me. Waiting, to see if I would do what was needed.

I can’t say I didn’t hesitate for a second, but I brought the knife down to my hand. I had hoped the hand would come off with one swing, but that wasn’t the case. My vision became blurry but I didn’t give up. All my body screamed at me to stop as I sawed off my hand.

When my left hand was no longer connected to the rest of my body, Bubbles showed up, picked it up, and took it to the wolves. The wolf that had Javi pinned down, let go, and swallowed my hand. 

“Javi! You have to go now! Before the sunset!” I begged.

“I can’t leave you! You are going to bleed out!” Javi looked at me, terrified.

“I can’t leave. But you can. Please, they will let you go. But only until the sunset. I’ll be fine. I promise,” I cried.

Javi ran to me and gave me a hug. I wanted to go with him so badly, but I knew that wasn’t possible. 

“I will come back for you. I promise,” he cried.

I nodded. I saw the animals open a path for him to get back to the car and waved at him as he made his way down the hill and I said there until the sun finally set.

I never saw Javi. I just hope he is well and has somehow put this tragedy behind him. The rest of my family didn’t make it. After that day, I took Don Pepe’s place and became the caretaker of the hacienda.

People would show up from time to time, just like my dad had shown up for Don Pepe and I make sure to kick them out no matter what. With one exception.

After many years of isolation, two young men offered to install wifi and I allowed it. But they are still not allowed to stay the night. I will say I have grown fond of them, but I don’t want them to have the same fate as my family.

All I ask of you, the reader, is that if you find a hacienda in the middle of nowhere, don’t approach it. And if you do, make sure to leave before sunset.