u/TigerTime2025

We would listen to the rustling leaves of
A sanguine breeze
We would talk and laugh,
Smile and glance,
as if no time at all had passed

One of Us, most likely You, would innocently graze contact over eager skin
—Even knowing now won’t stop the gasp erupting from within

Gazing into your deep and beautiful waters,
Like looking at the calming seas of familiarity,
While simultaneously,
Staring into the Unknown
of nature’s magnificent abyss.

I would be remiss,
if I didn’t say,
that you have quite the way,
of brightening my day

Anytime I would see that ray
of brilliant warmth,
escape your face
It got me in the feels
Up from my heals
All the way down to my base

What would we do on a wonderful Wednesday?

Any day with you would be full of wonder

Maybe we would take a stroll beside each other and just ponder…

I would attempt to saunter;
Enjoying a pleasant bimble on the sandy shores of love

But my hungry heart would get overzealous;
It would give me away with its ravenous beats

It would never feel satiated by your tantalizing treats

What that means to say…

Is that there would never be a day,
where I would be so grey,
that your rainbow of love,
raining down from above,
would make me think,
that I wouldn’t want to drink,
from your refreshing rivers
every single day…if I may.

Knowing the Wisdom that is of never stepping in the same river twice,

What would you like to do on a Wednesday?

‘This special meeting of the council has been called to discuss the possibility…

That she didn’t know!’

The echo chamber erupts into a cacophony of opinions and tones

‘How could she possibly not know?
I mean, look at us.’

Gestures vaguely

The guy with the gavel shrugs

‘It’s cuz you soook!!’ Disgust shouts from the back. Angst and Aversion snicker and high-five the rebel member

Indifference rolls its eyes

‘There was just too much going on! There always is—there’s this, there’s that, don’t forget about the other thing. Oh no!! There’s more??!!! It never ends—like, where are we right now even? Do you know? I don’t fooking know. Maybe that guy knows—hey! Yous guys know anything over there?!?’

No one answers Overwhelm; no point, really. It’s all fodder for a spin out in that one

‘Well, you probably got so good at masking and denying yourself love that no one can tell what you’re doing,’ a member of the Judgemental group lobs a disapproving comment over to the Sad group; no one in Sad can see past their shame to fire back at them. They remain greyscale-blue in the corner.

Judgement assumes a self-righteous air; this provokes a few from the Angry crowd to mope on over to the Sad side.

Worried that Fear might pop up and sway the rest of the majority, Inspired interjects

‘Our fears, masks, and walls are not reasons to assume people will not love us. Love that is True can see past all that’

‘Tru dat’ Playful gives Inspiration some snaps.

Insecure and Vulnerable have been holding hands through all this, and are too self-involved and worried about their frenemy, Fear, to realize that Suspicious and Skeptical—the known klepto duo—are picking their energy-pockets.

Drunk off the fermentation of Fear, Suss and Skept attempt to start some shit by listing off the many random reasons that the lady is staying hidden.

Shit has been started.

Rejected starts yelling at Abandoned—Despair takes this personally.

Worried and Anxious have some sort of panicked-chicken competition to see who will vomit first.

Frightened mows down Scared on the way to the door

Avoidance books it to the other side of the room, tripping over a conveniently timed limb protrusion by Awful

Apathy, Empty and Bored saunter to the side for a smoke.

Devastated is face-down on the ground

Ignored remains ignored

Irritated expresses its Impatience

Aggressive and Threatened appear to be adding to the mayhem with random body checks across the chamber while blasting a song that encourages the listener to “Break Stuff”

Surprised is too shocked to do anything but stand there with its mouth hanging open

Everyone in the Content and Trusting group sits in silent equanimity

Contempt shakes its head disapprovingly

‘Hey guys…?’ Everyone stops and looks at Inquisitive. ‘May I ask, who is the “she” we are referring to as the one who didn’t know? And what is it they didn’t know?’

Throughout the room, mouths open, then close almost immediately

‘Her, obviously. We know what’s up,’ Dismissive and Indignant snide

‘It is obviously us who doesn’t know anything, ya dumbasses,’ Critical sneers. ‘Fragile agrees,’ as they put a Critical arm over Fragile’s shaking shoulders. Fragile looks around Nervously, wishing to speak, but doesn’t feel strong enough

‘Perhaps we are all the “she” who doesn’t know,’ Pensive pipes up.

Groans can be heard across the chamber floor.

‘Must you be such an arrogant prick, Pensi?’ Annoyed asks rhetorically

Embarrassed turns a new shade of red

‘What the hell is your problem, Emby? No one was even talking to you,’ a Resentful member derides.

Embarrassed and Humiliated huddle up to think of a response. After a long deliberation, Emby turns to the group, takes a stinted breath, and says, ‘nuthin’.

‘Good gravies you two are Annoying. Why do you even come to these things? You don’t add anything of importance here,’ Resentful continues.

Emby and Humi hang their heads and drag their feet over to Ashamed and Powerless, who are waiting with open arms.

‘Why are we here again?’ Confused asks the chamber

‘Fuck if I know,’ Perplexed scoffs.

‘Great! Let’s all put a pin in that for now, take a thirty second recess, then proceed with items 2 thru infinity’
And will someone please go check on Devastated—last time they wondered off into no-man’s land, and it took us forever to find our way out,’ the guy with the gavel laments.

‘On it!’ Helpful springs into action

Anticipation continues to wait on the edge of its seat…

My Treat😘😁

Also, I put the tag as “Friends” bc I think if we met up again for the first time in a public setting as “Lovers”,
We will be asked to leave🤪🤭

Is it Pride,
That denied
Those feelings
inside?

Fear told me not to leer
But I couldn’t not,
I’m sorry dear

I tried to veer
To a different tier

Of humanness,

Of something
less of a mess

But no matter how
I tried
to put it in a dress

Ultimately
I had to confess,
While under self-inflicted duress,
That I’m still trying to impress,
Still attempting to guess
What it is you request
And
What might make you say Yes,
To this Mess of a Dress

The confusion is everywhere; reproducing confused amoebas, distracting the airwaves.

It is not confusion about loving you; that will not change. Even in those shitty-ass moments where I am confused about that, I always come back to unconditional love. Even if the outcome of this is some of the worst scenarios I can come to mind with—which are numerous unfortunately— I will forever choose to have love in my heart for you. And the outcomes I see that matter, the ones that still keep me here and going, those will love and forgive, regardless.

I want you; that hasn’t changed either. And I hope you want me too.
But again, I have to honor a relationship, or lack thereof, in which there is not the same kind of love.
I won’t lie and say the thought of that doesn’t feel devastating; but that shouldn’t keep you from reaching out—if that’s what’s happening.

In previous posts, I think I’ve maybe been too cavalier about claiming this isn’t a choice—it absolutely is a choice. I have been, and do, choose you. Every time.
My insecurities get the best of me in those posting moments where I sound unsure and forced.
I’m also trying to convey the supernatural feeling of this all.
And to relay that this is not my “normal” state of being. I don’t just fall head over heels for people. And this is like head over heels cartwheels.

The fear and insecurities are still trying to seize power, and they meet hope in the middle with, ‘idk wtf to do’
Oh ya, I already said that

I’m attempting to go for gold by convincing the fears that sometimes we have to face them, and then leap into them. Leaping off a cliff into the unknown air having no idea what is awaiting that jump, is not historically recommended.

But that’s how I feel about you. I will continue to free-fall in this abyss, hoping, wishing, sometimes even knowing, that you’ve jumped too.

I haven’t gotten to the place of making this love poetic again yet; I would really like to get back to that lovey romantic feeling where creativity can flow.

But the confusion makes it hard to let anything flow

In my life, many people have not made it feel safe for me to express my feelings. I didn’t feel that way with you; that doesn’t take the worry away that you might not react well to me trying to honor my truthful feelings rn tho. Bc I don’t want these feelings to keep festering inside of me. Nor do I want to feel resentment—for you or anybody else. But tbh, I’ve seen the bitterness grow a little bit more.

It eats away at me why you won’t acknowledge me, as you, in human form. And it’s not just the fact that I’m willingly throwing my heart into the aether without any actual confirmation that you are here—this is still a big one. But it’s also the why of you’re not facing me.

Do you fear me?
Bc the thought of that makes me feel physically ill. I would never want you to feel fear about me.

Do you fear the situation?

I can understand that, as much as I can without knowing anything. I’ve got fears up the wazoo too, boo. If this is the case, let’s work through them together

Is someone keeping you from contacting me directly?

If so, is there something I may do or say to alleviate the situation? I want to say fuck off to them, whoever “they” are, but I can have decorum.

Is there some sort of time frame issue you are waiting for?

Are you just pushing me to see how far you can?

The fact that I know I would let you makes me feel pretty sad rn. That I would give you the world, and anything I have in it, including my whole heart, without hesitation.

But you won’t even give me acknowledgment, of any of this. That I keep offering you pieces of my heart and soul, yet you are remaining behind your solid wall.
And before here, it hurt that you were like that with me in person. I had to remind myself of the dynamics often, and that you felt you had to be that way.

But now, what gives?

It’s hard for me to explain away my bitterness to myself when I feel like I’m being treated in a way that I do not find respectful.
And I’m fucking letting it happen, if not fully doing it to myself.

Why do I still deserve your silence?
Why do you still think it was ok to drop me suddenly, with sucky reasoning that basically pointed an ambiguous finger at me, then leave me high and dry?
And I’m supposed to be like, yup, she loves me. I know it without a doubt, and I will remain here in my unrequited love without a need for clarity or recognition months and months later until when..?

Dude, that fucking sucks. It sucks feeling it, admitting it, and also knowing I do have this undying love and loyalty to and for you, and it would keep me trapped in this mind fuck forever.
So ya, I feel some bitterness. Mostly at myself, but towards you too.
Bc your inaction at this point makes it hard to truly believe you care about me. Whatever the reasoning, you are choosing that over me, repeatedly.

Am I asking too much just to hear you say, ‘yeah, I’m here’?

You know, a prominent theme among people close to me over this lifetime is the fact that they willingly kept knowledge away from me when i was directly affected by it; when I asked them, over and over, to their face, to tell me the truth about this very specific thing.
But no, apparently it was for my own good not to be told the truth; or, my hypothetical reaction would be not worth it to them to disclose information that involved me.

It is depressingly ironic that this has happened so much in my life, when I’m one of the most curious creatures out there, especially. I crave knowledge and understanding; I’ll ask that ridiculously long list of questions to get to a better understanding of something. Then there will be a list of follow-up questions after reflecting upon the first set.
Tho, when it comes to my personal life and ppl who say they love me, but who have also hurt me—I can’t have an authentic answer to my straightforward question?

The deep wound of this deceit and abandonment of course happened before we met. But you stabbed into those wounds, for reasons still unknown, which makes it even harder not to see this as just another shitty example of someone not giving a shit about my heart or feelings. Do y’all just like to watch me bleed? Like wtf is so fascinating about provoking, then abandoning me? It’s not like I’m this uber dramatic person irl. Do I not seem human enough, so ppl get some sort of phobic rocks off by pushing every button they can find, watching the blood escape me, then walk away smiling while I lose my life force out onto the floor, alone…?

I don’t want to believe that, I really don’t. I want to believe what I feel in you, which is light, love and goodness. I know you have a dark side—we all do. And I love all of you, light, dark and everything in between💓

There is also this piece of how it feels like I don’t know parts of myself bc I don’t know you.
Knowing the physical you, of course, but knowing your emotions and thoughts feels somehow connected to my own emotions and thoughts. This is new and different in a way I can’t really explain rn; but I’ll say not knowing how you feel is like not knowing myself. I started feeling this way while we still saw each other, but it’s grown into something deeper. I have never, literally never, felt the need so intensely, to know how another person feels and thinks. It’s beyond intrigue—of which you have a lot. It somehow surpasses love as well. As though my soul is missing that from you, knowing you.

Idk if you understand how vulnerable just that last paragraph, let alone all of this, makes me feel. Do you somehow think I’m being super cas and not affected by this all the live long day?
Naw dawg. This has consumed me even in the moments it has not. The lasting silence from you after the action you took with inefficient communication, makes my head spin in such a way that I feel like jumping out of my skin and throwing my brain in the waste bin.

But this is all on me, right?

I can acknowledge my shit, I can take accountability, I can respect the notion that these were possibly agreed upon experiences before my body arrived here

But ppl take advantage of that; of my willingness to take responsibility for my actions, of my regard for kindness and open communication, of my ability to forgive, of my desire for peace.
They look past that and see me just as a mirror to use and abuse.

Bc sometimes taking advantage means someone is refusing to take accountability for their own actions, and instead focusing their attention on every way it was me or someone else who caused everything bad to happen. That no matter how removed I was from the situation, I’m somehow worth blaming it on. Or not worth something, I suppose.

The original point I was wanting to make in this letter is that despite the insane amount of confusion I feel rn, I love you with or without your love.

I choose you, and that won’t change.

I could not imagine myself saying these words to someone before you, let alone a void of ppl and computers, one of which I am only hoping is you.

Yet, I am here, offering authentic, compassionate, and unconditional love to You and/or a faceless void; every single day, hoping you hear that loving call, and return in kind.
Or tell me this was all an experiment, or game, or misunderstanding, or aliens, or what the fuck ever.

But I fear I will have no more heart left to give if you string me along just to watch me drown in a pool of my own desires.

I also fear how much my agency and ability to trust—me, you, the void, humans in general— is being pushed in this.
Like bro, what am I supposed to do here? I feel that I am bound by your unknown boundaries, and my need to continue respecting those uncertain lines. And also my overwhelming need to know where you are in all this—I can’t just walk away. I won’t.

It makes me so frustratingly angry at everything in my life, when I want and need to be better than that.
I feel catatonic when I have a voice.
I feel debilitated when I have the ability to move freely.
But I can’t. I can’t move away from you, and apparently can’t move closer to you—or you move closer to me.
I can’t sing my songs of love and light when so much unresolved grief fills my body and mind—I can’t even get to the dirges to mourn those feelings.

And just saying those words make me want to tell myself to fuck off—kinda you too, but I’m trying to not keep putting this on you.
It just sucks to keep having ppl in my life feel the need to control me, or take away my control, so they may feel a semblance of control in themselves.

So, if you love me at all, like I think you do, please don’t let all of me bleed out in front of you.

I would write you love letters, poems and notes every day if you wanted me to…
May I have the pleasure of knowing how you feel about me too?
Even if it’s pain..

Bc the pain of not knowing; and what that could mean, and what that does currently mean, is too much.
And I started this journey in an inordinate amount of physical and emotional pain…are you truly just trying to see how far you can push me? Bc I’ll play a game with a fever of 103’. That doesn’t mean it’s the right decision or that is the healthiest. If you’re pushing me until I’m better, or break, who knows when to stop?
you knew about this pain, and you seemingly dug your fingers into the wound, just to widen the hole. And while I bleed out on the floor, you just stare at me? Or you’ve already walked away, and I’m just Fight clubbing myself here.
Fuck.

Ok well, I wanted to end this on something of a high note, so I hope you see past my wounds and fears to hear that I love you

I’m still here, and I will be til the end

Regardless of any possible ill-will feelings, from me or from you, I will always care about you, always love you, and always wish the best for you.

🫶🏻✌️🖖💓
-A

Welp, to add another unwelcomed loop to the rollercoaster (*see the writing I did this morning that I didn’t post, or finish), my therapist wanted to do a partial session before she goes on a trip for a couple weeks, so we met briefly today.

Last week is when I told her I had made the decision to go and see you. Not that she was necessarily on board for me doing that last week, but today she made it clear that if it were her in your position, she might feel unsafe, and possibly even threatened if I just showed up in her workplace uninvited after severing the connection.

I would never want to make you feel threatened or unsafe in any way.

She suggested I wait until she gets back to move forward in any way; I told her that I deeply want to respect you, but I’ve also been in this limbo place since April, and I finally made the decision to go see you face to face, to get a clear answer from you, and waiting another several weeks to even discuss another option didn’t sit right with me.

So we settled on an email.

But wtf am I supposed to say? How am I to write something semi-professional that both honors what I feel like we’ve had here, with the level of depth and love I have grown to accept and feel for you, while also honoring the very real possibility that this is all made up in my head, and you are none the wiser to my activities since that day…?

Can’t say today’s session didn’t knock the wind out of my sails—I had just been picking up speed and felt like I was getting the hang of it more too.

Now idk wtf; bc I’ve been trying to not allow those negative thoughts that I’ve entertained in this for so long, and was getting to a place of no doubt about us, and just belief in what I feel is True…and now, this.

I don’t even know what else to say here. It sucks how much doesn’t feel right when I doubt this, and (most) everything feels right when I believe—yet the rest of this 3D world keeps trying to tear me away from even knowing for sure if this is real, or if I’ve seriously gone off the rails, for reals.

And even if I know in my heart I would never want to harm you, you don’t know that—the you here possibly, and definitely not the you there if not here.

Fuck this fucking sucks. I still believe in us; it’s just hard to hear and really accept from someone else close in this that You, the person I love and respect so very much, might genuinely have never wanted to see me again after that last day.

Not to mention the level of internal fuckedness if I truly did make ALL of this up inside.

Specifically after months of self-anguish, back and forth of trying to honor my feelings and any possible ones you might have, etc, then finally making the decision to give myself agency in this, only to be swatted back down like an insignificant insect in imagination land.

This is not on my therapist, nor You; I am the making of my play pretend.

But being given the stop sign after I’ve already yielded so many times on my own before feels a bit more like a play pretend prison.

And I honestly don’t even understand what I did wrong to warrant being sent to my jail cell in the first place.

Not that I wouldn’t listen and honor any feelings and explanations you have that makes you believe I did deserve that sentence—I just don’t understand, any of it.

And I feel like I need to understand you, and this, and us, more than anything I’ve ever not understood.

Honestly, even more than my purpose in life do I feel the need to understand this and us.
In part, that is bc I had, and have been understanding my purpose more and more—both outside of you, and with you.

But I’d be lying if I said that you hadn’t become a very big part of that picture. And from my perspective, it was not something I willingly chose to do.
As in, sure you are heart throb-crush worthy, but I don’t think I was so broken and lonely that I had to attach you to that dream, without your or the Universe’s consent. It all kinda happened, and I’m still trying to sort out the pieces. But it seems like just when I’m getting into, really into, the enjoyment of this puzzle, something or someone (sometimes just me) comes along and mentions that I’ve been working with a defunct spread.

They (or I) pick up a few pieces and point out how much they don’t match the puzzle I believe to be working on. Do you know how disheartening that is to live your life putting a puzzle together, believing it will eventually turn into a whole picture, just to find out many of the pieces actually go to a completely different puzzle, one I’m not privied to at that.

So idk wtf, again.

Because in this reality, I do not have confirmation that you truly are there, hearing, seeing, and feeling me. That makes me feel so deeply fucking sad that I don’t really know what to do with it, or where to go from here.

Sometimes I feel like I’m missing the most obvious fucking signs that this is True; which can be in such sharp contrast to the repeated realizations that I’m just that fucked in my head rn.

If you’re not here, never were, and never would be…once again, idk wtf.

And this brain is too filled with feelings of dread to attempt that semi-professional email rn—do u even want that?

You didn’t respond to my last text message—which my therapist mentioned might be an indication of genuine feelings of not wanting to ever see or talk to me again. Ofc I already considered this, but it’s still too ambiguous for me to go against my heart by believing that to be the final answer.

I could really use your guidance if you are here. And not guidance from one of your many possible masks—though, I very much appreciate all of the support everyone, whoever they are, has given me in this thus far.

But this is between You and I

You, the person I believe to be my other, most often better, half; the person I want to spend so much of this life with, and now can’t imagine not—I want and need your council.
If you are truly here, I want to be too.

I can’t stay apart from you, and I really don’t know what to do with that. I have never felt anything close to this feeling.
But they are my feelings, and yours are still classified as unknown unfortunately.
So, idk wtf to do; I can’t keep revving my engine, then take off just to slam on my brakes immediately after, over and over again.
I can’t just stay idle either. I’m trying to move on in my life, to try and forget about you and us for brief moments of time to actually be a person in my day. That’s what “they” say to do anyway.

But I’ve never really fit into the boxes other people have laid out. I can squeeze myself into them for periods of time to be a “normal civilian”, straining my body to shape myself into that mold; but for what? Do I have to? I don’t think I do, generally.
But specifically, when it comes to the box of you and me, I can’t in good faith force myself into something you never intended, nor laid out for We.

I also cannot let you go, until I know, from You, how you feel, and what I should do.

So, how do I appeal, to the You, of you and I?

Might we fly? Or is this just My Big Lie?

So again, idk wtf

Hope you’re doing something enjoyable today💓

Love You, Always (even if you never see this)

-A

The longing

Feels

Endless

The anticipation,

Hard.

Not knowing

if I'm
on

Your
Dance Card.

To not know,

To not feel,

To not have...

Have

…something real.

And hopefully,

This is not,

Not
all in vain..

It would be worth it

Though,

Worth

All the pain

To feel

All the insane

To See you,

To Hear you

Call out my name…

And say,

‘Yes Dear,

I do feel

The Same.’

Taking a peep
At Something
Felt
Oh So Deep

Is also
Taking
A leap

Carrying
A wound
that does
Still seep.

Though Time
Hath
Rightly Healed,

Not all Parts
New and Old
Hath
Properly Sealed.

In the past
I just peeled

That tender scab
And did not yield.

But now I wield
A sword of Loves
Standing in this
Field of doves

And so I ask,

If you are up to the task…

Would You
Still
Leap
Knowing of my
Wound
That does
Still
Seep?

Or must I be
Healed

Fully and True

For you to
Know Me

And for me to
Know You?

Hmmm, should I take that a weirder step further?

Wtfn
Might as well go balls to the wall at this point

I like your musk

My oh mi was it intoxicating

Your scent was so subtle, yet layered and complex; a mix of fresh, sweet, musky, and slightly floral wrapped in a gentle earthy warmth. I know at the time I could list the individual notes more precisely, but it’s been a while since I’ve…smelled you 😅

And I’m not even thinking about this particular near collision now. I’m thinking about a different time, more recent, when it had just started to get hotter outside, and we passed by each other.

I’m laughing at myself writing this, so let me preface my next statement with, I was not intentionally smelling you, I was just breathing like a normal human and your scent wafted into my nostrils.

But holy moly did that whiff stir something significantly primal in me.

And I played sports with women and men; I’ve smelled sweat on skin, I’ve noticed the minute differences in many people’s aromas. And some of them I have been attracted to—the scents, not as much the people.

🤭
But when I was olfactorally (maybe should be a word) introduced to your foundational fragrance that day, it shifted something primordial in me.

It was as though it activated that sense’s part of my memory; I recognized that scent, it was somehow familiar to me, yet also incredibly enthralling. I was drawn to it in a way that seemed beyond simple attraction.

🤭🤭
You know how they give tracking dogs a sample of a scent to follow? What if that’s written in our code? To find certain scents in our lives?
I ‘air-scented’ (dog tracking term, maybe cats don’t know about all that) you that day, and it imprinted on me.

Suddenly those sultry thoughts I had been trying to keep at bay had heightened—considerably.

Have you ever eaten something you would normally find quite delicious while having a stuffy nose?

They say ~80% of what we consider taste is actually attributed to smell

It flattens the experience to not have sense of smell be a part of our food enjoyment, muting the ability to taste complex flavors.

🤭🤭🤭
Knowing your aura’s mmm aromas cleared my otherworldly nasal passageways; I could taste you there; know what your skin smelled like with my lips pressed against you; savoring your salty goodness kissing my lips. I could inhale your rooted flavors and be honored to have your natural perfumery stay with me long after our ethereal encounter.

So ya, I’d fusck with your musk

Gawd I wanna kiss your face!

Feel the relief of that sweet embrace

Wrap my arms around your brilliant maze

Inhale your inebriating haze

Get caught in your fiery gaze

I want you to touch me here,

and kiss me there

Ripping Everything Bare

Undress me

With your eyes

Bind me with all your ties

Tease me till

I Rise

Bring me to the place with all the sighs

Me-Oh-My’s

What a Surprise!

I Came

To A Party

A party of me and you

And what did we do?

We entwined these burning bodies

All the night through

Unless I hear otherwise

Is there a day/time you would prefer?

Shall I wait in the lobby, or come straight to your door?

Wanna hear something kinda funny? Earlier yesterday, now, I talked with my therapist about maybe coming to see you; we discussed other options, but going back to the place we used to see each other and waiting for you feels like the only viable choice to me at this time. But also giving you a chance to show yourself here—bc I don’t wanna show up without giving you a heads up and the ability to tell me to hold up.

Fast-forward to evening time, my friend invited me to a show in the park (I f+cking Love this city🥰🌈 You do too, ya? I very much want you to show me all the places and things you know about here, fur realz.)
So, I show up to this show; a unique show, a beautiful show, a silly show, in a beautiful park. My friend is already there, in the front, and she often has different ppl with her 😆 I appreciate that about her tho, cuz it doesn’t feel fake, like she tries ppl on; she genuinely enjoys meeting and befriending ppl. I also just prefer to see ppl through my Good-in-them glasses 😍

Anyway…
I met her very nice friends, and one of them is a chef at the restaurant next door—Ain’t that sum apples!

I’ve gone past that place a ridiculous amount of times, even before I met you. Never eaten there tho. Smells hella good. You try it?

Also, during the music portion, as many kool kats started dancing up by the band, I got this strong feeling of wanting you and I to attend this concert (and any other concert🤗). This thought was triggered by the brief sight of a couple holding each other, swaying to their own beat; it was lovely. I could see us doing that. I wanted to feel us doing that whilst feeling you in my arms.

(Ok, on the dl, ngl, I’m a bit nervous-pervous about the prospect of seeing you. You get it.

But I’ve also never hopefully-anticipated something and someone so much in my life. Hopefully, you get it…?)

Ok Dear, well I look forward to seeing and/or hearing from you

Oh ya, I guess I should say some sort of threshold here…

So, I would like your answer to this before Monday. If I do not hear from you, I will be there sometime next week

Love you, to infinity and beyond!🌈✨💓

-A