u/Timely-Birthday-8067

Online and IRL. Dale Partridge said on X “70% of black families do not have a father. This alone is sufficient reason to warn your daughters against dating black men.” I believe he is married to a Latina and said interracial marriages are not ideal another time before that. There was that Chud guy who claimed to be Orthodox (although I think the church denied giving him baptism because of his behavior) that was rage baiting and harassing random people. The church I went to before the one I’m at now had a lady in Sunday school class say God was against interracial marriages. The teacher corrected her and apologized to me. I want to be clear I do not hold that against the church and I think the lady was just highly misinformed. My own mother (who I do not think is saved but did grow up in church) said she didn’t know if my existence was a sin or not (I’m mixed).

I moved to a diverse area as an adult and haven’t felt unwelcome or unsafe whatsoever due to my skin color. My church has interracial couples. My kids haven’t been bullied over their looks and honestly, if someone asked them what race they were, they’d be so confused about what that means. They know people have different skin colors of course but they don’t understand categorizing race the same way I had to at their age.

I know racist trolls existed and will continue to exist. I just pray for them, and their hateful opinions have no bearing on my life or who I am as a person. What I am shocked by is in the year 2026 I see this uptick of this kind of sentiment in Christian spaces, whether it’s videos or comment sections. Not just political disagreements or arguments about wokism or whatever. Literal slurs or “fatigue” or memes about Jewish people. Maybe it’s not technically racist but posting crusade memes after that horrible mosque shooting. I could go on. And they post with crosses in their bios or their GiveSendGo comments supporting racists without fear of church correction or someone countering with scripture.

I’m really craving celery sticks and hummus. But what else to eat around that?

In summary for those who don’t know what I’m talking about: "Beauty from ashes" is a powerful concept symbolizing the redemption of pain, grief, or loss into something beautiful and purposeful. Originating from a well-known biblical promise in Isaiah 61:3, it represents the idea that hardships are not the end of your story, but the very soil for a restored future. I’m in a joyful, praising mood and want to hear your stories!

I was thinking about this today as I care for my rowdy sons. It wasn’t easy for me to understand God’s fatherly love when I was young. I was let down by every man in my life. I was abandoned by my father and first step father, was emotionally abused by my other stepfather, bullied by boys in school. I could only ever rely on the women in my life and even then that was patchy. I grew to trust women more than men. I met my lovely husband who was the first person I felt like loved me for ME, not just because he was obligated to. He is an S tier spouse and man. Before I had kids, I dreamed of having sons and daughters, but I definitely couldn’t imagine life without a daughter. Girls were all I knew. And God gave me sons! I’m not mad about it, either. Maybe one day I’ll experience playing dolls and tea party with my granddaughters or nieces, but I am enjoying this season I am in with small boys. They’re my shadows, always wanting hugs and kisses, snuggles, picking wildflower bouquets for me, and I could be wearing an old basic dress and my youngest tells me how beautiful I look. My oldest refused to write on his schoolwork “The cat is fat” because he thought that was a mean thing to say. What a blessing it is to finally have healthy male relationships. And what an honor it is to have the responsibility to raise men of God, future husbands and fathers. It’s something I won’t take lightly. Even my cats are boys! One follows me around everywhere and sleeps with me while the other is so sweet and patient. That’s one of many of my beauty from ashes moments.

Just genuinely wondering if I am in the right place. Every time I ask a question on how I should respond as a Christian wife to something in my interfaith marriage, I for the most part get solid replies and people trying to help. I also always get hit with “that’s what you get for marrying someone who’s not a Christian” and nothing else helpful in their replies.

I acknowledge that Christians should date/marry other Christians and that not doing so can make life and faith more difficult. But not everyone was a Christian when they got married (like me). My marriage really is a solid happy marriage despite our religious differences but like everyone who is married there can be hard or stressful patches. Those patches don’t have anything to do with religious differences. I only mention my husband isn’t religious because he will not accept advice to talk to my pastor or read scripture. I am more or less asking what I should do as a Christian wife. I’ve talked to other people (mostly wives) who have also been shamed for being in an interfaith marriage. My marriage is not “doomed” solely because we’re interfaith. Timothy’s mom was in an interfaith marriage. We make lemonade out of lemons.

I am genuinely asking, not just venting: do Christians in interfaith marriages belong here or should we seek advice from other forums? If this space is solely for marriages where both are Christians, I understand and I will go to a different forum for advice. If this forum is for Christians regardless of who they’ve married, I would love to stay.

TL;DR: different ways of handling conflict; I’m apparently crazy if I express my hurt feelings so I shut up and bury my feelings. I’m sick of it. Seeking advice for when marriage is in a less than romantic or passionate phase and you’re just roommates. We love one another but it’s not feeling warm and fuzzy is that makes sense.

First, as I write this, I will acknowledge that I may be a bit hormonal. I quit Prozac a few months ago and I have my up and down days, but mostly up thankfully. I also can’t always trust my feelings especially in the heat of the moment.

Secondly, my husband is an atheist so Christian counsel wouldn’t really apply here. But he is a GREAT husband and a GREAT man. He naturally embodies a lot of Christian virtues and values. I envy how forgiveness and patience just come to him so naturally. He is also an extremely hard working man. He’s working two jobs right now since his workplace slowed in overtime this year, and car repairs ate a large chunk of our savings recently. There’s no doubt in my mind he loves me and will never leave me.

Here’s the issues: he’s working a lot so we don’t really see each other much. We’re two ships passing in the night. Most interactions are pleasant. We send each other funny tick toks or text messages. But small conflicts just build over time because we handle conflict SO differently. I’m a “don’t go to bed angry” type of person, and he will let something stew for literally months before he says anything. Usually it’s not months, but maybe days. Or he knows he hurts my feelings but instead of apologizing or talking about it, he just pretends nothing happened and I wasn’t sobbing in the other room all night. The last time I just let my feelings out he told me I was crazy and mentally unwell. So now I just keep my mouth shut to keep the peace. I am far from perfect, but I’m trying my hardest to be the “good little Christian wife” and be kind and forgiving, and I have sex with him even when I don’t really WANT to for his sake. Which even now that happens less and less. Maybe once a week. I’ve started doing more of what is traditionally manly chores to ease his burdens since he’s working more often. But every conflict just sits and sits and never gets revolved. Tonight I was accused of unplugging his alarm clock (he didn’t miss work or anything like that; this was in the evening before bed he noticed it was unplugged). Even after defending my innocence, he says he knows what I did and he is upset he has to reset it. I angrily slammed the door to his room, we didn’t say a word to one another, and now I’m just in my room sobbing (we have separate bedrooms if that’s confusing). And I’m upset because I probably won’t get an apology and tomorrow I have to put a fake smile on my face for him and my kids and pretend that never happened. It’s death by a thousand paper cuts. If anyone went through a less than romantic and passionate phase of their marriage, any advice??? He has Asperger’s and ADHD too if that makes a difference.

The problem is I don’t live near a Honda dealership and it would be inconvenient to go to one for a drain and fill, especially if I have to go back a couple of times. However, there’s a couple mechanics near me who will do a drain and fill, but I don’t know what kind of transmission fluid they use. I will somehow someway go to a Honda dealership if I HAVE to, but I’m hoping I don’t have to. What would you do?

I assume not AD 90 by John in Patmos? Or am I wrong? I’m not understanding the timing of when Revelation was penned by partial preterists. TIA for trying to help me understand.