8 Common Obstacles That Diminish Your Power
I’ve now gone through the most common misconceptions about power and how to maintain your power in the best way possible. In this post, I’ll be going through 8 common obstacles that diminish your power, how to avoid them, and how to use them to your own advantage against other power players. Let’s begin.
1. Drop the Guilt
If you want power, drop whatever guilt you have, because it’s only going to hold you back constantly. I’m not arguing you shouldn’t have a conscience and become an evil Machiavellian; I’m arguing that if you really want power, then having a guilty conscience is one of the biggest obstacles that will keep standing in your way. And you must avoid it at all costs.
The powerful elite know this trick very well, and that’s why they’re constantly using it against you daily. They want you to feel guilty about the smallest things, so that they can accumulate more money and power for themselves through careful deceit and manipulation. It’s the oldest trick in the book, which is why most people never reach their full potential.
Also, keep in mind that dropping the guilt has nothing to do with doing anything bad or illegal. I’m strictly talking about everyday occurrences in the social game where you’re faced with interactions with other people. In many of these interactions, you will tend to slip up, say something wrong or stupid, do something wrong or stupid, etc. Thus, the worst thing you can do is to let guilt take hold of you when it’s much better to let it go immediately.
Understand that feeling guilty about something will only waste precious time, energy, and money, which you cannot afford to waste in the game of power. At the end of the day, no one cares anyway, and you only have one life to live. And so, you should never apologize for anything you say or do unless you hurt or cross someone in an unjustified way.
Believe me, I’ve hurt plenty of people throughout my life, but I’ve always known in the back of my mind that most of these people deserved it and had it coming. Most of these people probably couldn’t care less either and never took it personally in the first place, because in the game of power, nothing is ever personal. I have, however, reached out to someone to apologize for something I knew was out of line in the past and didn't deserve it. But generally, I never apologize for my actions and stand by them 100%, as I should.
And so this is the approach you also want in life. As long as your ways are justified, never let guilt hold you back, and never apologize for the things you say and do, because it will only diminish your power and create awkward situations. It’s much better to move on and forget about it quickly. It’s also much better to own up to the things you say and do than to feel guilty about them, because even if you said or did something others dislike, you will gain so much more respect when you stand by it than if you back down and apologize like a coward.
Politicians do this all the time when they get caught with their pants down, only apologizing because they got caught in the moment, but not because they really mean it, which demonstrates weak character. Trump, on the other hand, never apologizes for anything and doubles down on his statements, which demonstrates a strong character who does not back down from anything or anyone (Law 28). Although he certainly is a liar and a cheat in many ways, he is not two-faced like most Politicians who shift with the wind whenever they feel their power base is threatened.
That’s why so many people can relate to Trump, despite him being a billionaire, because he nurtures the common touch (Law 38), says it like it is, and knows that, just like himself, nobody else is perfect (Law 46). Realize then that we are all flawed creatures with our own strengths, weaknesses, ego, shadow, and insecurities, and there’s no point in denying it. It’s much better to own it and make the best of it. People might judge you, but who are they to judge when they are no better and come from the same cloth? It’s just another good reason to drop the guilt entirely and embrace your true nature.
2. Never Feel Shame
Just like guilt will hold you back, so will shame. Now, shame is a bit trickier because there are plenty of things you might do that are indeed shameful. So again, I’m not arguing that you should do whatever you want without feeling any guilt or shame; I’m arguing that you need to be aware of these feelings that will only hold you back in your quest for power.
There have been plenty of times I’ve felt shame, mainly because I haven’t done enough or lived up to my full potential, which I know is very destructive for my own well-being. But in terms of interactions with other people, I rarely feel any shame at all, because it’s a game, and we’re all playing it, whether we like it or not.
And so, the game is nothing personal; it’s just business, which is why both guilt and shame are worthless emotions that will only hold you back. You think your fellow courtiers care about guilt or shame; think again. With some exceptions, he or she is too caught up in his or her own self-interest and quest for power to be concerned with such nonsense.
I don’t care how nice, sweet, and innocent they portray themselves; they all want power deep inside, and they will do almost anything to get it. And girls/women are the most deceitful players you will ever encounter in this game, because they know how to disguise their true intentions naturally (Law 3), which brings us to the next topic.
3. Ignore the Opposite Sex
When it comes to power, no other force in the universe is more detrimental than the opposite sex, especially if you’re a man. Men are traditionally supposed to have the power and be the bread-winner in a relationship, which is why so many young men are feeling frustrated and lost in a society that has been demonizing them for being men and constantly encourages them to go against their own nature.
That’s why so many young men won’t bother to contribute to society and engage in relationships, as they’ve figured out the math doesn’t add up anymore to put in the required effort. Women are also suffering deeply from this fact, as toxic feminism and MSM have successfully brainwashed them to think they don’t need a man anymore and should rather become strong, independent women. Well, how has that worked out for you so far?
In any case, if you want power, especially if you’re a man, ignoring the opposite sex is perhaps the best thing you can do. Not only will you stay sharp and focused on your goals, purpose, and values, but it will also become much easier for you to get women once you've established yourself as a high-quality man through years of hard work and effort. Indeed, men have always lost women by chasing them (they don’t want to be chased; they want to do the chasing themselves), but men have never lost women by chasing money and power.
And so, if you really want a relationship with a high-quality woman, this is your best approach. As a high-quality man, I’ve been rejecting plenty of attractive women left and right because I can and don’t have any need to engage with them at all unless I really want to. Remember, in this game, you must always remain the strongest player by making them need you way more than you need them (Law 8 and Law 11). When you come from a place of abundance and have plenty of options, your life becomes so much easier and more peaceful.
Keep in mind that men are slaves to their sex drives in their teens and twenties, but become much more aware of their sexual impulses in their 30s and learn how to master themselves to keep their peace of mind and secure their long-term goals, instead of constantly falling victim to their own desires.
Short-term pleasures will, in fact, hold you back if you’re not careful about securing the long-term goals that will keep you in power. Women might win the game in the short-term by taking advantage of their youth, beauty, and seductive nature, but men will always win the game in the long-term, as long as they make wise decisions that keep them in power.
Understand that once you’ve locked yourself into a serious relationship, getting married and having children, there is no turning back. Thus, if you have not secured your long-term goals and a high-powered position in life at this point, you are literally screwed, and your life will become a miserable hell. All of your freedom, independence, peace of mind, and abundance have gone straight down the toilet, and you can never get them back unless you make a drastic move and start all over again. Smart, powerful men, however, know not to lock themselves into such a position in the first place by maintaining their power, freedom, and independence at all costs.
I’ve always viewed marriage and children as a trap that will only drain men of all their worth. But I certainly do not discourage anyone from getting married and having children if that’s what you want. I’m just here to warn you that if and when you do, you must be fully aware of and prepared for the consequences. Because more often than not, I only hear about people regretting making such a decision in the aftermath. And most importantly, you should never get involved in a serious relationship unless you have secured yourself an abundance of money and a high-powered position that will last for years to come. Because if and when you fall, women tend not to stick around for too long unless you quickly get back up on your feet.
Even if I were filthy rich, I would never risk my fortune, independence, freedom and peace of mind getting married, as only a minority stay married regardless. I’d much rather have a long-term partner I can trust, appreciate and value, who does not threaten my independence, freedom, money, and power. But to each their own.
4. Self-interest is Key
If you want power, focus on your self-interest at all times. All humans are inherently selfish and caught up in their own self-interest, and so are you. In fact, it’s what makes you unique and different from other people that determines your true power: what you like, what you dislike, what you value, your political position, and so on. Thus, one of the biggest obstacles to your power is other people’s self-interest that doesn’t match your own.
Indeed, you will often find yourself in situations where you feel like you must do something that you really don’t want to do, especially in work-related situations. And this goes back to the first point: never feel guilty about things other people want you to do but which you don’t really want to do.
Personal Example 1:
Back in my early days, when I was just a Shop Employee, working my ass off for almost nothing, I still wouldn't take extra shifts unless I wanted to (and I usually wanted to work extra shifts because of the money). I would also tell one of my co-workers, who felt sad and upset one day because she was asked to work more, that she should never feel the need or pressure to work more unless she actually wanted to herself.
Realize then, that whenever you are saying yes to someone else, you are essentially saying no to yourself unless you really want it. And that’s a big difference, because if you don’t make choices on your own initiative and premises, you are robbing yourself of your own freedom, independence, and personal power. Going against your own self-interest, then, will only do you harm and reduce your independence and power.
Remember, powerful people will always find ways to take advantage of you to fulfill their own self-interests and get their way at your own expense. And so, you must learn how to constantly defend yourself against these attacks, fight back, and become powerful yourself.
Many powerful people do, in fact, respect people who stand up to them and tell them no to their face, because it shows a strong character who doesn’t put up with any BS. In a lot of such cases, they are more likely to cooperate with you afterwards than to go against you. In this coldhearted world, proving yourself and showing some balls will typically catch people off guard and earn you more respect. However, they will show no mercy to the timid who do not have what it takes to make it in this world (Law 28).
Personal Example 2:
Back in 2010, while I was a miserable Production Worker after losing my previous job, I pursued a Security Guard certificate simultaneously and eventually became one. Thus, during the holiday, I worked for a Security company (I’ve never taken a personal holiday in my life because I’m always working and can’t stand vacations) to keep myself going, keep the money flowing, and gain new valuable experience.
However, even when I was in a low-powered position, there were still aspects of the job I refused to do. One of them was taking night shifts since I’m picky about maintaining a good daily rhythm to preserve my health and well-being. And so, whenever the boss called me to take such shifts, I refused and told him no, no matter how much he whined and begged me.
And the reason why is simple. Since I already had a full-time job and only did this job for fun, I had leverage and the ability to refuse my superior's orders. He could fire me right there on the spot, and I couldn’t have cared less because MY OWN SELF-INTEREST always comes first! That is real value, that is real independence, and that is real power! And I never felt any guilt or shame about it whatsoever. To me, it was just another walk in the park and carrying on with my business.
Learn the lesson then, and never let other people’s self-interest interfere with your own, because it will only make your life miserable. In fact, it is much better to make your own decisions and do something you don’t really want to do than to do something other people want you to do. The difference is simple: in the latter scenario, you have no say or power, but in the former scenario, you have ALL say and power!
Last but not least, you will always find other people with mutual interests, and these are exactly the people you should surround yourself with at all times, as they usually will increase your power instead of decreasing it. They can help you willingly with no strings attached, like providing valuable information, knowledge, and expertise. They can also defend and stand up for you, open up doors for you, etc. You must also nurture their self-interest by helping them out as much as possible to ensure long-lasting relationships built on trust, respect, and mutual interests (Law 13). And you must never betray them, or the doors will potentially be closed forever.
Note that I’m not talking about cults or groupthink, which you must avoid at all costs, because such people are not rational and will always make painful mistakes and poor decisions that will only hold you back. I’m talking about independent, competent, and high-powered individuals who know what they’re doing. These are the types of high-quality people you must always seek out and develop a small circle of inner trust that will keep you strong in the game as long as possible. Ignore other people who do not share your values and interests, as they will only hold you back. Trust me.
5. Pride and Anger
Throughout my life, I’ve always been fascinated with the 7 deadly sins and have had my own theory that every human on this planet possesses mainly one of them that keeps holding them back. For me, it was always Pride, the worst and deadliest sin of them all. I’ve been obsessed with winning and being the best in whatever I do all of my life, and I’ve always had to pay a high price for it in the end.
But to me, pride is inevitable in a society that keeps telling and pushing you to be the very best and reach the top, no matter what. Men are particularly vulnerable to pride in their struggle for excellence in a society that pressures them to perform constantly. And if they don’t strive for excellence and perform at their very best, society tends to shame and discard them as useless waste (remember points 1 and 2).
Indeed, pride cometh before the fall, and if you let your pride interfere with your rational and logical decision-making, it will almost certainly reduce or remove your power completely. How many times have you witnessed great legends fall victim to their own ego and pride, only to get back up on the horse, only to fall right back down again? It’s an evil, vicious cycle that is hard to break unless you have tremendous self-awareness, self-discipline, and self-control. And even then, pride somehow comes sneaking back up on you to ruin your day once again.
Thus, to battle pride and keep you in power, you must practice the perfect blend of humility (the opposite virtue of pride) and real confidence (not arrogance) by acknowledging what you’re good at and staying at that level, as well as acknowledging what you’re not good at. We all have strengths and weaknesses, and we cannot and should not try to be great at everything. That will only hold us back and make us miserable when we don’t achieve what we desire.
Thus, much more is gained by focusing your forces (Law 23) on what you’re really good at and by keeping at it until you reach your full potential. That will give you so much more pleasure, satisfaction, happiness, and fulfillment in life because you stay true to yourself. It will also keep you grounded, stop you from making foolish mistakes, and stop you from going further than you know you’re capable of (Law 47). Most importantly, by staying in your rightful place, you will maintain your power base, rather than losing it to foolish decisions.
Anger can also destroy the power that you have carefully built over the years. In fact, Robert argues that anger is the most destructive emotional response, which clouds your own judgment and vision. If you let people get to you, if you let them get under your skin, if you let other people anger you, you are essentially allowing them to control and manipulate you.
Thus, becoming angry is pointless because it does nothing for you in the end, other than bringing you sorrow and ruin. The point is not to get angry ever (I’m usually angry all the time); the point is not to let your own anger consume your power. Your anger must always be directed outwards in a controlled manner towards other people, mainly your enemies, and never directed inwards. The former will keep you in control at all times, whereas the latter will eventually make you implode, lose control, and perhaps even lose your power.
Again, realize that the game is nothing personal; it’s just filled with other power players, some of whom cannot hide their disdain, envy, and hate they have towards you (Law 46). This will often come out in subtle ways and not-so-subtle ways in your daily interactions. Generally, then, it is better to ignore people who try to get you upset and not taking anything personally as you keep moving forward towards your main goal.
Conflict, chaos and drama are inevitable on your journey regardless, and it’s all up to you how you want to handle them in the present moment. Typically, you want to resolve conflicts as quickly as possible, find the best solutions, and keep moving forward constantly. Other times, you must set clear boundaries and make people aware you’re not one to be messed with. In the end, it’s all about context, and you must trust your own instincts and judgement in knowing when to ignore people and when to fight them.
Personal Example 2:
From 2015 to 2017, I worked as a Middle Manager in a grocery store while pursuing my MBA. Since this store is really big, there have to be two Middle Managers present at all times, one at the front near the cash registers, and one in the back near the warehouse. One day, I was busy at the toilet in the warehouse when I heard they needed help down in the front. I initially thought they already had enough employees down there to help out, but they didn’t, and the bell kept ringing.
Finally, I was on my way down there, only to meet a furious Assistant Manager who yelled at me instantly for my misconduct. I, however, remained calm and composed, as I knew I hadn’t done anything wrong; it was just a big misunderstanding. She wouldn’t let it go, though, and kept yelling at me before slamming the door on her way out. It still didn’t bother me one bit, and I never said or did anything else about it, moving forward.
A few days later, she came up to me while I was working, feeling down and zoned out, probably regretting her behavior and what she said earlier. I still brushed it off like it never happened and later used it as a perfect example of what NOT to do and how NOT to behave in these kinds of situations in other job interviews.
Realize then, that when you let your anger face inwards and consume you, you fall victim to your own behavior and lose your power. By staying calm and composed, however, you will always keep yourself in check and maintain your power. And yes, I know that’s easier said than done in this crazy world, but it’s well worth the effort. Remember, only your own well-being, happiness, and power matter.
Personal Example 3:
As a health freak and bodybuilding enthusiast all of my life, I love going to the gym to kick some serious ass and have great workouts. One day, however, I encountered two fools who wanted to test my resolve and patience. Being the good-looking, muscular, and fit guy that I am, these older and not particularly attractive fools couldn’t help but let their own hate and envy get the best of them (Law 46).
And so, they started harassing me with some small petty BS as an excuse, when they were, in fact, just jealous of my mere presence. I’m not going to go into details, but I wouldn’t let it slide at all! Thus, after making some lame accusations about "inappropriate gym conduct", I fired back instantly, accusing them of doing similar things, which was actually true (Law 44). I attacked them relentlessly, non-stop, to let them know who they were dealing with (Law 19).
Again, shaming and guilt-trip tactics do not affect me whatsoever (points 1 and 2); I do as I please as long as I don’t hurt others who don’t deserve it. Needless to say, they quickly folded when they realized I was no joke or pushover. One of them (I never saw the other fool again) straight up avoided me at all costs once he realized there were serious consequences to his actions. It was funny to me, and I even politely gestured to him at one point, making the notion that it was not a big deal after all. But push me too far or make stupid accusations that have no root in reality, and all hell will be unleashed.
This is how you stay in control and maintain your power: by directing your anger outwards and unleashing it in a controlled manner on those who truly deserve it, like the fools I just mentioned. If someone is pointing their finger at you, then you must point it right back at them and never become a victim. After all, it’s not your fault; it’s their fault, and they’re the ones to blame for your frustration and anger, not you.
6. Never Become Rigid
Rigidity is one of the biggest obstacles to your power because the only thing that is constant in life is change itself (Charles Darwin). Thus, as I’ve mentioned many times previously, your ability to stay highly flexible, fluid, and adaptable is crucial to your success and power (Law 48). And this is easier said than done, given that most people are stuck in their own ways and will rarely change unless they have to (humans are inherently lazy, which is why only a minority truly succeeds).
Thus, you gain a big advantage on the battlefield if you’re able to stay proactive at all times, making wise decisions today that will ensure your future success. The reason why so many people and businesses fail all the time is that they stick to what they know instead of embracing the unknown, the trends and patterns that are relevant not just in the present moment, but also in the future.
The perfect example is the guys behind Blockbuster, who had a major opportunity to buy Netflix’s business model, only to be outcompeted in the market entirely by the creators of Netflix (remember my previous topic on how to avoid painful mistakes that will result in long-term failure?). On the other hand, businesses like Tesla, which proactively keep improving in both known and unknown areas, not only survive but thrive in the business world.
Musk is, in fact, one of the richest and most powerful men in history for a GOOD reason! The same goes for Bezos, who started with a simple online bookstore and later expanded into areas unrelated to books, making Amazon perhaps the most successful online store in history.
Thus, you should never become rigid because it’s only going to hold you back throughout your life. Only those who are constantly willing to change and adapt will survive and thrive in a world that is constantly changing for better or worse.
7. Avoid a Fixed Mindset
Just like you must never become rigid, you must also avoid a fixed mindset. People with a fixed mindset do not learn and grow efficiently. These people assume they already know what’s best for themselves and neglect to change their thinking, routines and habits for the better. Thus, these people never learn and achieve a higher consciousness to become the best version of themselves.
On the other hand, highly successful and powerful people keep themselves on their toes at all times and learn consistently every day throughout their lives because there’s so much to learn and there’s always room for improvement. These people know very well that the more they learn, the less they know, which keeps them humble and grounded. Humble and grounded people also typically receive more favors, offers, and opportunities throughout life.
Thus, practicing an open growth mindset can only help you obtain more power and reach a higher consciousness. The road to get there is painful and hard because it requires both real-life experiences and a strong willingness, determination, and dedication to learn and become the best in whatever field you choose in life.
Getting a college degree is a great start that will provide you with a higher conscience, as well as better opportunities, which means more money and power. But I would argue that your personal studies and willingness to acquire valuable knowledge in your own spare time are just as important. Never stop learning, and keep an open-mindedset that focuses on growth, as it can only benefit you in your quest for power.
8. Avoid Isolation
If you isolate yourself too much, you have no way to maneuver in the game of power, which is a social game (Law 18). It doesn’t matter if you’re an introvert and a Sigma male like me; too much isolation will essentially ruin your clarity over time. You might even start getting paranoid, angry, bitter, and resentful, which is detrimental to your mental health and well-being.
Understand that regardless of how independent you might be, you’re still dependent on other people, whether you like it or not. Thus, it is much better to embrace this fact than to ignore it, because ignoring it will only harm you and your future. You also have absolutely nothing to lose and everything to gain by using other people to your own advantage, as long as you don’t make them resent you or distrust you.
People, just like myself, generally love helping other people because it will either make them feel important and/or appreciated, emotions that are priceless in the game of power. In fact, making other people feel valued and appreciated for their work, knowledge, and effort is a much more powerful tool than any monetary incentive.
Monetary incentives will more often than not come across as cold, heartless, and meaningless, which does not result in productivity and effort. However, people who feel valued and appreciated by your actions will never stop helping you out in times of need. You must also make sure to help other people in need when you can, because it’s the right thing to do, and it can only benefit you in the long-term if you play the game right.
But keep in mind that your dealings with people must be genuine and never fake. Most people can smell BS from a mile away, and so, as long as you come across as trustworthy, respectful, professional, and communicate clearly, they have no reason to reject you. But if you take them for granted or disrespect them in any kind of way, they can potentially close the door forever, which you must avoid at all costs.
Understand, then, that needing other people is not a weakness; it is, in fact, a strength because you can only become better at playing the social game by engaging with them, even as an introvert. It doesn’t mean you have to pretend or be somebody you’re not, because you shouldn’t; it just means that you keep the doors open and have valuable information and expertise at your fingertips, and you would be stupid not to take full advantage of it.
Conclusion
Although there are plenty more obstacles that can prevent you from becoming powerful, these are the 8 most common obstacles off the top of my head that you should be fully aware of. Feeling guilt, shame, and letting pride and anger get in the way are the most common obstacles, which many people struggle with in their everyday lives. Thus, if you want power, discard these useless emotions and focus on the bigger picture instead, as they will only hold you back.
On the other hand, if you want to play the game dirty, you can instill shame and guilt in others by pointing out their mistakes, flaws, wrongdoings, etc., which will help you gain an advantage on the battlefield. You can also play on their fragile ego and make them angry, which will make them lose their temper and make foolish mistakes that will be their own undoing.
People with little to no self-control never maintain a position of power for too long because they’re too caught up in the present moment in reactive mode to realize they’re destroying their future potential. Use this to your own advantage, then, by setting traps that will eventually lead to their own downfall in the end, while you stay on top of your game.
However, never use such tactics on people who don’t really deserve it or have it coming. Choose your marks and battles carefully instead, because whether you feel guilty or not, karma will find a way to punish and reward you in the end. Thus, it’s much safer to mind your own business, keep your hands clean at all times (Law 26), and let other people you dislike dig their own graves, as they often will.
One of my most hated enemies, whom I mocked relentlessly some years back, recently made a huge mistake that cost him a lot in terms of reputation (Law 5) and even threatened his position of power. However, I did not kick him while he was down; I actually felt pity for him instead and wished him well (only in my thoughts, of course).
Thus, leaving other people to their own wrongdoings and mistakes and taking the high road is usually the better option for your own well-being. This is especially true if you achieve success, which will only anger them even more, while you stay peaceful and blissful. As always, success is the best revenge.
I hope this has been beneficial in your quest for power. Stay on your grind and never give up, no matter what. Good things always come to those who put in the work and who stay patient consistently over many years. To the young people here, especially, remember you have nothing to lose and everything to gain by going all out on your potential. Those who came before you and who are above you do not care about you. They, just like the people who came before them, are too caught up in their own self-interest and ruthless quest for power (Law 1).
The sooner you realize that fact, the easier the journey becomes, because you will learn to take nothing personally and deal objectively with hard truths, facts, and competence only. Even in your darkest, weakest, and lowest moments, you will recognize the game for what it really is, and respect the rules with dignity, which is much better than to pretend, deny reality, and become a pitiful beggar (Law 22).
Stay hard, stay true, and stay in power! Your time will come!