u/Unhappy-Song3638

What gives you the courage to talk to me?

How can I make you come up to me?

Questions that I’m too afraid to ask you.

Call me anything but a creep, but I beg of you just give me a peek.

I crave your attention; it makes me sick, sitting, waiting for you to arrive.

I want to smile and run up to you.

But being perceived with a crush (despite how beautiful you are) has never worked well for me growing up.

The stares of judgement and jealousy scare me.

The lies they spread, don’t consider them for a second.

Though I possess feminine features, I am a straight male.

I would *never* lie to you. Ask me a question, and I shall deliver the unvarnished truth, my love.

Are your sorrows too deep to carry alone?

Can I carry your weight of problems on top of my own?

My heart throbs, as much as my wrist aches.

Though your body is frail, I’ll never harm you, and I’ll never let you be impaired.

Give me one more chance, one more sign, one more greeting, merely one more possibility of me and you.

I promise I’ll act, I promise I’ll duel with my spine made of grass, and my heart made of glass.

Or rather I just need to hear you speak to me once more.

Show me it’s alive, given that your swain in distress is pining for you.

Which tower must I climb to reach you?

What gives you the courage to talk to me?

How can I make you come up to me?

Questions that I’m too afraid to ask you.

Call me anything but a creep, but I beg of you just give me a peek.

I crave your attention; it makes me sick, sitting, waiting for you to arrive.

I want to smile and run up to you.

But being perceived with a crush (despite how beautiful you are) has never worked well for me growing up.

The stares of judgement and jealousy scare me.

The lies they spread, don’t consider them for a second.

Though I possess feminine features, I am a straight male.

I would *never* lie to you. Ask me a question, and I shall deliver the unvarnished truth, my love.

Are your sorrows too deep to carry alone?

Can I carry your weight of problems on top of my own?

My heart throbs, as much as my wrist aches.

Though your body is frail, I’ll never harm you, and I’ll never let you be impaired.

Give me one more chance, one more sign, one more greeting, merely one more possibility of me and you.

I promise I’ll act, I promise I’ll duel with my spine made of grass, and my heart made of glass.

Or rather I just need to hear you speak to me once more.

Show me it’s alive, given that your swain in distress is pining for you.

Which tower must I climb to reach you?

Your beauty enchants me, I can’t help but feel blue.

Like a dog in TSA, or a compass pointing towards its mark; evermore I shall crash into you.

Side eye, or no eye, I wait patiently for your gaze. Perhaps, you’ll see the beauty in my seas reflecting back onto you.

You must know already, as I suck at hiding it.

Yet, I continue to admire you from afar.

I love your cheesy smile.

I love your red pasted lips.

I love the way you stare so intensely at me. Like you see right through me.

I wish I could leave you be.

I wish I could get you out of my mind.

But I’m just a hopeless romantic.

Stuck in time.

I try my hardest to avoid you, to give you space, to make you feel comfortable, yet I always end up seeing you before my day ends. I wish you would know, I’m not doing this on purpose. I crave your eyes on me, though I don’t have the courage to look at yours. I pray we can converse once again, during a time my throat isn’t tied by your splendor. However, I must distance myself to get rid of these feelings. I can’t do this to you. You don’t deserve such treatment I know, but the thought of making you uncomfortable around me hurts me more than I could ever imagine. I like it when you talk to me. I like it when you park next to me. I like it when you say hi & bye to me; it makes me feel seen. Do you see me? Do you notice me? Do you remember the things I’ve told you? Are you a beauty unaware of your existence? Or are you so profoundly insightful it aches? You have a boyfriend, yet I’m just a fool.

No clue why, I’m always nice, try to socialize but I suck as this is my first job, and I never had luck making many friends growing up. I try to initiate conversations in the past and offer them gum, water, or something I can potentially get them. I feel like I’ve had 1 good conversation with someone here, and it’s never happened since. I feel like they try and avoid me most times, which sucks since we’re beside each other for 8 hours a day. It’s not like I’m talking for an hour straight, at most I’ll ask them if they’re doing good, if they have any plans later today, if they seen this new show/anime, ask them how long they’ve been growing out their hair for, etc. Just tiny things to try and make conversation, but if I don’t feel the energy I’ll just back off and leave them be. Most of them (4/5) are always finding an excuse to leave the room or something, which should take like 5mins but always takes an hour or longer. I don’t know what I did to make them feel this way about me. At first I thought I had a stench or bad breath, so I started flossing everyday, cleaned my washing machine, then rewashed all my clothes, even had my friend (childhood friend) come over to ask if I smell or something, which he told me I smell clean (even asked me what cologne I used), my hair doesn’t stink and I typically style it myself once a week, I brush my tongue, even started using a moisturizing nasal spray for post nasal drip (which could be from overthinking). I take a shower before I go to work, when I come back, and at night. I changed all my cats(neutered) litter boxes, litter, give them baths once a month, and mop every Sunday. i go to a dermatologist so my skin is butter clean, I really just want to make more friends. “Treat others the way you want to be treated” right? right??