Am I expecting too much, am I the issue, or is he just not that interested?
I’ve been dating my boyfriend for a few months, and I’m starting to wonder if we’re just incompatible.
I haven’t seen him in almost two weeks. He works full time, teaches kids baseball, is in a master’s program, and had a baseball tournament this past weekend, so I understand he’s genuinely busy.
Last week I asked him over for dinner, he said he was busy, and never suggested another day. Since then, he went to a World Cup game watch party in NYC until 2 a.m. and is leaving for another baseball tournament this weekend. I usually find out after the fact or not at all.
A little while ago I brought up that he felt distant. He reassured me that it was because of work and family issues and had nothing to do with us, which I appreciated. But since then, the lack of communication and effort hasn’t really changed. He also had time to go to the Mets game and hang out with a group of friends that included girls, which made me question whether he’s actually too busy or just not prioritizing the relationship.
I’m not asking for constant texting or attention. I just expect someone I’m dating to communicate and make an effort to see me. Even a simple, “I’m slammed this week, can we do next Tuesday?” would mean a lot.
At this point, I’ve stopped asking to hang out because I don’t want to chase someone. If he wants to see me, he can make plans.
Am I expecting too much? Am I the issue? Or are his actions telling me everything I need to know? Would you stay in a relationship like this?