u/WorkhorsePuritan

I've gotten a lot of positive responses to this song before but feel like the melody needs to be changed. Am I crazy or incredibly right?

So this one is pretty definitively a blues song, likely Piedmont style. Some people were interpreting the riff as jazz which is almost there. Anyways would love to hear your thoughts.

Lyrics:

Trying to find my place in the crowded paths of history
I’ve got nothing for Heaven, except a word for my angel and a melody
And a torn-up Gospel
Found in my memory

I met a road who called out, to leave my quilted tent
My hair began to fall out, now I feel every headstrong gust of wind
Mark me down as undone
But nonetheless, here I am

I’ve been fishing in a well for over nineteen years
And I’m running out of sweet words to put in my ear
I try my best to listen but the sound won’t bear
The cicadas drown me out before I finish the prayer

Just a little demo I was working on last night. I've been realizing more and more just how few instruments are needed to carry a feeling. Finally feel like the songs are breathing a little bit.

Just made this tonight. I think it's got a good rhythm. The lyrics are based on minor complaints I have with Arizona's public/private partnerships and populist swindlers.

Lyrics:

Underneath the data site's
An ancient grave
Where we dream of life
So free and fake

If you buy this box of mine
You might live through
The apocalypse
And hellfire too
We don’t speak truth
But almost do

Speaking to a phone that’s fallen
Off the hook
I listed all the thousand
Souls we took

And listening to a seashell
I heard the news
Our blood is red
Our skin is white
And our souls are blue

Been trying at this one for a while, but I may just leave it here and move on. Very difficult chorus to match on account of the slow tempo and simple melody.