u/Worried_Orchid_1591

19 days late, not pregnant. I’m not passionate about anything anymore, I do everything automatically. The only things that calms my thoughts is playing games on my phone or tomodachi. Don’t want to see anyone, don’t want to talk anymore, ruminations stops only when I go to sleep. Last time I was late as well, thought I’d go to the psych ER cause I had bad thoughts. And I feel like I’m going to get stuck in this state. Every month I feel the same thing but each month it feels new at the same time. Idk how to explain. I always think « oh ok i’m not gonna make it out alive this month ». I feel like a dramaqueen but can’t control shit…

So i was wondering. With so many days late, am I still in luteal or does the body « skips » it to go back to the beginning of the cycle ? I’m desperate

Was diagnosed 8 months ago and I’m learning my patterns, emotions etc.
And I notice some patterns, wrote them down. Apparently now I say "Oh, I feel like that because when I get *insert negative symptom*, it’s related to autism" a lot.

And people won’t stop saying "everyone feels like that".

As an exemple, I have pmdd. And I know that biological females that have a neurodivergence have more chances to experience comorbidities. So I try to explain with statistics and science. Then, they’ll say "Yes so everyone has a neurodivergence"

I met one of my therapist 4 days ago. I dislike her but I see her every 4 months, otherwise I have 2 other therapists that are amazing (the 2 who clinically diagnosed me) and I went to her with my certificate. So she was like « ah yes autism makes sense » and that’s it. Anyways. 4 days ago she asked me « what’s an autistic burnout » when I talked about mine. I was a bit… annoyed. (I mean I know we’re 30 years late in France when it comes to autism but STILL) and then when I talked about some difficulties I met lately and told her it was part of my patterns as a late autistic diagnosed female, she said « well everyone on this earth functions differently, let’s not put labels »

But that’s not a label, that’s a diagnosis I got by 2 different recognized therapists that don’t know each other.

Yet I’ve been doubting. Kinda new to this.

How to tell « non neuroatypical emotions » from « autistic emotions » ? I feel like it’s about the intensity and reaction to them but. What’s your experience or your take on this question ?

For exemple I discovered recently that not everyone has meltdowns. When I get mine I really need to isolate and can’t control my body. I will hit myself, bite myself, rock back and forth, sometimes hit my back against the wall for like 30 minutes and then I feel better. Is this a typical behavior for autistic people, or can neurotypical experience this as well ?

Thank you 🌱