To the transgender girls (and boys!) that are looking for a night out to socialize with other Trans folks, DM me as I would love to coordinate something to build community. There are some great queer spaces to meet.
This post was edited to be more inclusive.
Some day maybe, in the meantime, taking care of myself and doing what is right for me
Thought it was going to be a wrestling match. Not perfect but happy with the elevation. Why did I wait so long??
Being a transgender woman, I have met several cis women when going out to queer spaces who have been very friendly and welcoming. Although I identify as Transbian, I am still attracted to cis lesbians. Do cis lesbians ever have interest in dating a trans woman if they are in a poly relationship?
With all of the unpacking we have to do when we are dropped off at the trans station, it was so important for me to first identify who I was without consideration of sexuality. Once I was right with identifying as a woman, the path to my sexuality slowly became clearer. For years I grappled with who I was. Was I gay, bi, kinky, scarred from past events, did my prior view on religion and spirituality play into my decisions or lack thereof? Experimenting without knowing how I identified gender wise kept me in the dark for years. And once the gender fog started to lift, I could see much clearer why I felt how I felt about my attraction to cis women and transgender women. The attraction to cisgender women was mostly about wanting to be like them, and although I still find cis women attractive, my heart is saved to be with another transgender woman like myself. The need and want to share my life with someone who is like myself and understands my journey to become transgender is a special level of intimacy that only two transgender women could ever understand.
I know many are asking this for purposes of validation, but all we are doing by continuing to use this term or ideology in our language to describe ourselves or others is just a continuation of supporting the disgusting notion that in order to be accepted or genuine that we must meet some societal standard of beauty in order to be valid. I am extremely tall, Adam’s apple the size of Rhode Island, and could have sung with the Oak Ridge Boys, but that does not dismiss the womanly spirit that lives inside of me. Validation is an inside job. So please stop encouraging others to use this destructive term. And using this as a goal for being safe only leaves many of us behind. Real, sustainable safety comes in numbers and supporting each other.
To our sisters and brothers in Germany, our hearts go out to you in the wake of yesterday’s violence. Stay strong and don’t let the hate ever deter who you are. ❤️🩹
I didn’t spend decades suffering under a thick layer of bedrock just to be told that I am now too much woman!
One thing that doesn’t instantly change for many of us is the feeling of being lonely. Going from hiding ourselves from the world to the excitement of finally knowing who we are, does not result in instant friendships and a fulfilling social life. Like anyone on this planet, it takes time to develop friendships and many of us are not well equipped in how to do so in this new life. And although there are times when it feels so lonely as we are bursting at the seams to be ourselves and share in that joy with others, I know that there is a difference between loneliness and being alone. We are never alone and the universe is always there, watching over us. It definitely takes effort to connect with others, but the letting go of expectations of others and being at peace with ourselves is probably one of the biggest growth opportunities I have gone through. And I know I am not alone in this experience. Hang in there everyone. More will be revealed and great friendships await us as we continue to blossom 🌸
The idea of socially transitioning used to be paralyzing, but then came a point where I knew it was what I needed to do no matter how scary it sounded. And each time I venture out, the more comfortable I become. It was exactly what I needed.
Crop tops are definitely part of the solution. Stay cool everyone 🧊
Now that the air quality is improving, any events or gatherings that others are planning on this weekend? Still going to be hot out, but that’s July in MN. Looking for community only. Looking for alternatives to the bar scene. But if that’s all there is, so be it.
Slowly but surely
She sat quietly, waiting a lifetime to finally emerge, but never left my side. We are ready when we are ready. And it took some life events to remove the noise around me so that I could hear her, my true self. I am grateful that she never gave up on me.
Several months ago, someone had recommended Roxy’s as a good place to meet others in the community. I have since been out to several LGBTQIA+ venues that have all been great, but find there isn’t a lot of Transgender representation.
I haven’t visited Roxy’s yet other than eating at the Nicollet Diner (which has a fantastic menu btw). Any feedback on how Trans friendly Roxy’s is and the ideal times to visit? What was your experience when visiting?
Although I have been comfortable at doing minimal makeup, aging is starting to interfere with my eye makeup. That and the wide lens selfies that my archaic phone takes! It’s difficult to come out later in life knowing you only have so many good years to present. Doesn’t take away from the joy of being a woman on the inside. Just makes it more challenging to feel accepted by the younger crowd. Using a very light filter to soften. Perhaps some makeup lessons could do the same