u/Xiaomifeng8073

​

I (33M) finally paid off my one-year debt of over Php 60,000. Although it is a huge relief that this excruciating loan has ended, I still feel a bit melancholic. I took out that loan for my ex of five years while we were in a long-distance relationship (LDR). My heart is heavy because my ex was a "green flag" in many ways—she was very kind and loving—but when it came to finances, she lacked understanding. I tried my best to help her by providing funds since she didn't have a job, but at her young age (22F), she was quite demanding. It is a long story, but to keep it short: it is exhausting when you are the only one carrying the relationship (ang hirap nang ikaw lang ang nagbubuhat sa relasyon).

Anyway, I made a mistake on my part because I was not patient enough. I resorted to an LDR because I always failed at courtship due to my "low face card," which made women find me unattractive. Because I don't have the best looks, my good intentions and solid plans for the future were my only selling points. I have been trying my best to improve my personal care by investing in good grooming products (men's perfume, oral care, deodorants, etc.) just to look and feel more confident.

I am finally debt-free, but because of the stress from the past, I am now suffering from gallbladder polyps and have no choice but to start from scratch with my savings. I hope I can build my savings up this time so that I won't feel left behind.

Do you guys think that is it worthy celebrating that I am finally debt free though I feel sad for myself because I broke up with her?