u/Yugan-Dali

they are always multiplying.

Shakespeare had a writer’s block. He wanted memorable lines for his play about the Prince of Denmark, but he could think of nothing.

 

His friend Richard Burbage stopped by. Will complained about his lack of inspiration. Richard said, “My friend, your mind is stuffy because this room is stuffy. Outdoors, the green leaves quiver with the cooling wind. Let us put aside your cares and go forth for a stroll.”

 

Shakespeare put on his hat and they went for a stroll by the burbling brook. He pointed to a pretty scene, and said, “There is a willow grows askant the brook, but see, smooth runs the water where the brook is deep.”

 

Richard stopped and turned his head to a verdant brush nearby. He said, “Hark.”

 

Shakespeare listened and said, “I hear a buzzing in the underbrush.”

 

Richard said, “Bees. There may be a bee, there may not be a bee, there may be two bees, I know not.”

 

The rest is history.

A large crowd gathered to hear a noted orator. At the last minute, the host announced that the orator had laryngitis and could not present the oration.

The crowd was speechless.

Adam: When I walked by Madame Olga’s Psychic Tearoom, I saw Madame Olga sitting there smiling, so I went in and punched her.

Malcom: Why did you do that?

Adam: My teacher said we should always try to strike a happy medium.

On Saturday, a friend in Japan texted me that he was out in the mountains for a spin with his family. A car coming the other way, passing on a curve, sideswiped him. Fortunately, nobody was hurt.
 
I wrote back, “Were you driving?” and asked about more details.
 
Fortunately I checked my text before I sent it. Autocorrect changed that to “Were you drinking?”