u/Zestyclose-Cause3954

Today I went to get a massage for the first time in a very long time. I used to get somewhat regular massages a couple of years ago, but like I said it’s been a while.

I went to a place in the local mall where independent therapists can rent out the space, and I had booked for head and scalp massage. I went in and the person helping me didn’t speak a lot of English, but it just ended up being mostly back / full body with some hot stone

The thing that really gets me though, is that I’m in so much pain it’s unbearable. When I left the massage I was already sore and when I mean sore I mean I can’t comfortably lie down, even when I was and go about whatever it is I’m doing, my muscles are hurting so badly that I have to breathe through just walking. In some areas it’s numb.. I asked her multiple times to do less pressure and she could hear me wincing and verbally saying “ow!” I just feel like this was too much and I don’t know what to do. Any advice or tips would be awesome:)

I just wanted to share my thoughts and feelings about this because I don’t know how to feel. This is something that occurs somewhat frequently, but I just wanted another opinion.

I have a 1 year old, and tomorrow is Mother’s Day. For other context, I’m also on my period. Today I woke up, did my second part time job in the morning, took care of the kiddo in the afternoon, did a deep clean on the carpet for a few hours, and then went out and did Instacart for an hour or so. While we were eating dinner, which he went out to get chipotle, he brought me some flowers, a card, and chocolate strawberries for Mother’s Day. We were sitting down to eat and he made a comment about “well you know because I got you these things, I think it’s time for a BJ”.

I get really annoyed at the transactional type of remarks, and I feel like I just didn’t want to do that today. I kept pushing it off, until the baby went to sleep. He came out and asked if I was in the mood, and I just literally didn’t want to, I was so tired. He got really angry at me stating that “I knew he was in the mood all evening and that I blew him off..” but I never stated I wanted to do that. I’ve communicated to him that 1. I think it could go both ways for that type of thing to happen, and 2. I’m on my cycle, and I just don’t want to.

As I stated, he got really angry with me and this isn’t the first time he’s gotten mad because I didn’t want to do it, so I just wanted another persons opinion. Thanks