For massage therapists out there. Does this job hurt your body and beat you up, or do you learn how to not get hurt while doing massages? Im mostly concerned about arms and wrists. I'm considering taking a course and I'm 62. I currently do reiki. Thanks for any guidance or feedback.
Hi guys, I had an interesting experience with a client the other day and I'm hoping to get some insight into what happened.
Yesterday I had this older, male client I'd say probably in his late 50s and he came in requesting a full body relaxation treatment and was really insistent on me also doing abdominal work. I don't normally include abdominal work in a 1 hr full body relaxation simply for the sake of time, as well as the fact that not many clients actually want their abdominals worked.
Anyways, he behaved respectfully and normally so I didn't think anything was weird until I began draping his leg in supine and I noticed a significant sized wet patch on the sheets right over the genital area, it was probably 2 inches long. There was no weird smell in the room so he definitely didn't pee himself and I kept my room at a comfortable 67-69⁰ so it wasn't hot. The rest of his body was not sweaty or clammy at all so it's very unlikely that he was just profusely sweating in that one area.
At the end of the session, when I went to flip my room I found that the bottom sheet also had a significant wet spot on it in the same area where the genital area would have been. Is this normal??? I've had many many male clients go commando before and this has never happened to me. How likely is it that he was aroused during his session and that this was a creepy, sexual response???? I've only been in this industry for about a year so I haven't had much experience with creepy clients yet, thankfully.
I told my boss about it and she was really weirded out by it and told me she'd make sure he couldn't book with me again. I just wanted to get some other insight.
To start, I’ve been going to this male massage therapist at a chiropractor office for the last year and a half. There were a few times previously, as I’ve been reflecting, that I should’ve listened to my gut. “Accidental” grazes while doing inner thigh work, pressing his body up against me in different way, etc. About six months ago I even searched on Reddit looking to see what is normal for inner thigh massage.. I know I should’ve seen the red flags, but in every other way he was profession.
This was until our session a month ago when he talked during the whole massage. I was a little annoyed, but engaged in the conversation. We talked about all sorts of things, but what stood out was they he told me he wakes up everyday and smokes a joint before going to work… uh okay, not professional obviously.
Yesterday I had a 30 min massage. He asked what we were working on today, I said low and mid back please. I usually wear underwear, but had just gotten a Brazilian wax a few hours before, therefore I wasn’t wearing any to help with irritation.
He tells me to start face down. When he comes back in he starts on my shoulders a bit and spine and then starts on my lower back, folding the blanket to do my left side. Almost immediately he is doing my hip and down my sciatic nerve. I’m relaxing into this and then he does the inside of my hip bone, underneath me, starting low and pulling up the hip. This was all fine and I didn’t have much concern. He goes back and is massaging my glute, as he does this the blanket begins to slide off my right butt cheek, so my full ass is exposed now.
Back to the hip. Each time moving his hands more inward towards my pelvic bone. Initially, I was feeling concerned about my Brazilian and the irritation with him touching towards my bikini line. I say this to explain that I was very aware he was going further in than he should be, and was feeling quite uncomfortable. Feeling very uncomfortable with him knowing I was freshly waxed, and he could feel there was no hair. Then he would go back to the glute.
He does the right side. Begins the same way as before but this is where he begins to take it further. He’s now reaching under me beginning right next to my labia and going fully up my bikini line. When he does this the pressure of the massage is now gone. It’s like grazing and touching. I’m fully freaking out, screaming inside my mind that this is actually happening, I can’t believe this is happening, but I can’t say anything or move.
He goes back to my ass. Same thing the pressure is gone and he has two hands on each of my cheeks fully spreading and grabbing me fully with his hands. His touch turns to more like foreplay than a massage. He touches my hands a few times in a caressing like way. He now goes fully under my legs brushing up again my labia over and over. This is when I started to disassociate a bit. At some point he put his thumb at the top of my butt crack and slid it down a little. I was completely frozen. I felt him spread my cheeks and his body shift so he was looking straight at my asshole. His touch got lighter. He was under my thigh for a lot of it pulling upward towards my bikini line, grazing my labia. Or on the back side of my thigh, rubbing his hands all the way up and over my ass, obviously I’m fully exposed. No blanket covering me at all. He was doing this to my inner thigh getting right up to my enterence and then brushing it and pressing up over my ass. And then like he had been in a daze he almost shot up, very startled like. It made me jump because of how quickly it felt like he snapped out of something.
Never once did he touch my mid back. Eventually he asked me to flip over. I did. The first thing he says is your hair looks so beautiful like this. I say thanks. He then takes both of his hands on my upper cheats and begins to massage my chest, sliding his hands down the sides and under my breasts. He brings one hand to my sternum and is rubbing it up and down, not in a massage way, in a grazing touch. He asks what I’m doing this weekend. I say I have no plans. He says me either. But I wouldn’t mind doing this all night. This continues, he goes more and more on my breast each rub and then he says okay that’s our time. But keeps going and says… and I’m stopping….. (keeps rubbing).. right… (keep rubbing) Now… but doesn’t stop for like a full 10 seconds. And then walks out the door.
I’m disgusted. I’m annoyed I just laid there and let that happen. And I’m well aware I need to do something about it but have no idea where to start and I am worried because he can get my contact information.
If anyone has any suggestions or can help me shut up the voice in my head that says “it wasn’t that big of a deal”, that would be greatly appreciated.
I went for a massage today, this was my 3rd massage with this person. She normally walks in and begins playing relaxing music on her phone. Today while setting up her phone she states “I’m feeling a true crime podcast today.” I didn’t know what to think, I thought maybe she meant she plans to listen to one later?? But no, she begins playing a podcast about a horrific murder (with ads included, as well as real, distressing 911 calls). Has anyone else experienced a massage therapist playing anything other than relaxing music???
Like switching a 90 to a 60
24M I’ve booked my first massage ever.
It is a 60 minutes Thai Combo Massage. I’m curious as to what do people wear?
Like, are we supposed to be completely naked? Or do they give some clothing to wear when we enter?
EDIT : A lot of people have mentioned it’s to do with the Location. I’m from USA, thank you so much for your responses. I think it’s mainly a preference.
I think I’m more comfortable with my undies being on. I’m mainly scared as to how awkward things might get if I get an unreasonable amount of blood flowing in my pelvic area.
Today I went to get a massage for the first time in a very long time. I used to get somewhat regular massages a couple of years ago, but like I said it’s been a while.
I went to a place in the local mall where independent therapists can rent out the space, and I had booked for head and scalp massage. I went in and the person helping me didn’t speak a lot of English, but it just ended up being mostly back / full body with some hot stone
The thing that really gets me though, is that I’m in so much pain it’s unbearable. When I left the massage I was already sore and when I mean sore I mean I can’t comfortably lie down, even when I was and go about whatever it is I’m doing, my muscles are hurting so badly that I have to breathe through just walking. In some areas it’s numb.. I asked her multiple times to do less pressure and she could hear me wincing and verbally saying “ow!” I just feel like this was too much and I don’t know what to do. Any advice or tips would be awesome:)
Hi im not sure what is proper protocol but my daughter is 17 and going for her first tmj intraoral lymphatic womens only massage. Is it ok for me to be in the room with her. Would that make a therapist uncomfortable? Im even thinking i could just come in for the first few minutes to explain why we are there and her tmj history etc then leave for the rest. What would be approprite do you think i dont want to overstep but she is a minor and might be to shy to speak up for herself ?
EDIT. Thank you all who repsonded. i was welcomed in and we went through my daughters tmj history and the masseuse explained everything she will do she was so lovely and so knowledgeable on tmj she made us both feel very comfortable. After the initial talk she gave me the option to stay or leave, said she did not mind at all and was used to being watched. My daughter wanted me to stay so i just quietly read a book. The whole experience was so professional and thorough. i am glad i stayed and got to know the therapist. my daughter is very comfortable with her now and will likely have me stay in the waiting room next time now that she is familiar with the whole process. I appreciate all the replies and hope this thread helps anyone else wondering about the same thing
I had the wonderful fortune of waking up a few weeks ago and experiencing a swollen knee that I couldn’t bend. After a steroid injection and continued PT, the ortho drained the knee of a little fluid, but it def helped the stiffness. My problem is the soft tissue above my knee continues to be swollen despite an anti-inflammatory, icing, and elevation. Ortho doesn’t have a great answer but says it’s synovial fluid being pushed out of the joint. Does anyone have experience with MLD in assisting reducing the fluid? Open to any options as it’s frustrating.
Hi guys. I am based in the UK and looking to complete a course in sports massage therapy. I am in full-time employment if that makes any difference for the advice you will be giving. I have done some research, spoken to people in the industry and contacted different providers. I am currently deciding between two different providers, one is around 1.2k and the other 1.6k. However, I believe only one is regulated and the other...not?
From what I have researched, both qualifications appear to be regulated and both allow progression to Level 4, insurance and professional membership. The main differences seem to be that Cotswold Academy has a strong reputation and offers an ITEC qualification, while Core Elements is around £400 cheaper.
I would really appreciate hearing from therapists who are already working in the industry:
Thank you!
I'm currently attending a massage therapy program to get licensed. My teacher is dating one of her former students, he just graduated the program a few weeks ago. She still allows him to sit in our class to 'help' and participate. Help as in, changing her powerpoint slides as she demos, carrying her things in and out of class, partnering up if we don't have an even amount of us (though we can ask others within the school). Most times he'll wait in the car all day until break or when class is done. It's been making a few of us uncomfortable. He's started some drama between us, telling our teacher we're talking bad about her. He's been giving some of us really harsh reviews on our massages. We can handle constructive criticism but saying comments like "maybe some day you'll be a good massage therapist." just seems more of a negative jab. When she asks if we want to partner up with him, most of us just suggest grabbing another student. Some days she'll just tell us he'll be there instead of asking. There also becomes tension if he gives another female attention. One of us did try emailing the director but it seemed to get brushed off. Any advice?
A family friend who has been a massage therapist for at least a decade is making about 80k annually. She's at an upscale resort/casino. Is that anywhere close to the norm? Can someone at a good spa or resort expect to make 60k+?
I’m just tired of late nights. I’m tired of being overworked. I don’t mind being overworked necessarily but I want nights off again. I like being up early and finishing my day before 7 and it’s almost impossible to do so in this field.
I want to pursue massage therapy, I’m going to a massage therapy school counselor to try to get properly trained. Ideally? I want to work in a spa. I love the spa setting because it’s the opposite of the chaotic restaurant setting.
What should I know about the industry? Is it super hard to get a good job after getting all the hours and certifications conquered? What do you wish you knew when you pursued this that you know now?
Changing careers is a big leap for me so I like to take a realistic approach
I had my first massage a month ago, it was only back massage for 45min, and I enjoyed it immensely, I would love to get 90min full body massage, they offer those, but I wonder if’s not too much work?
I don’t want my masseuse to be very tired just because I enjoy the sensation. Should I book 1h? What are the standards?
Edit: thanks for the feedback, I will definitely try 90min then!
I am 34 weeks pregnant & for my bday my husband got me a massage credit at a massage shop! It doesn’t expire & I get an additional ($30 credit) add on to the 50 min. massage! I’m wondering if I should wait until after birth to get one OR get a prenatal one? I’m the most tight in my back and have always held tension from my traps to my upper hips!! I just want to get the most out of it this lol! I’m worried with the prenatal i’ll just be on my side and they won’t be able to get as deep as I am wanting!! The prenatal is an optional add on I can use & i am thinking about if I get the massage AFTER birth that I can use the deep tissue add on option!!!!! I’ve gotten maybe 3 massages in my life, all years in between so I don’t have a lot to go off of! Thank you for all the advice!!!!
Okay, I know that I'm not explaining this well and I appreciate you bearing with me.
During my initial massage therapy training and during a medical massage therapy CE I took, we went over kind of a muscle test of sorts. The one that stands out to me the most was: have the person in a prone position and having them lift their leg to see which muscles fired first, and depending on that you could observe what the weaker muscles were and doing a sort of tapotment to help reactivate the muscles.
I'm unable to reach out to the school or the CE provider, and I'm hoping someone can direct me to what CEs would give me more education on this.
I'm also interested in CEs that will help rebalance posture, like if hips have an anterior rotation, or dealing with kyphosis, etc.
Thanks
I had open my own place before with some help but moving to a new state should I just do it. Been a year and I been working for someone but I do loventhe freedom of being my own boss.
I never used any massagebooks etc does that really bring in alot of clients
I’m honestly so confused right now and don’t know how to feel at all. All I do know is that I feel violated and upset.
To preface, I (23F) have been seeing my (40s?M) massage therapist for over half a year regularly, once or twice a week. He has always been absolutely phenomenal and has helped my chronic pain SO much. Literally the one thing helping me through my condition. He is friendly, knowledgeable, and has always been very professional and I’ve always felt safe and trusting- until today.
I pay for a 60 minute session and he often gives me sometimes half to double more than my session time, if he has the time, and I’ve always appreciated that since I’m a frequent and reliable customer and he owns and runs his own business himself.
Today’s 60 minute session ran for almost 2.5 hours. He often exposes my breasts and works on the area (with my prior consent) and this has never made me wildly uncomfortable as I view it as therapeutic and necessary for treating my issues. I’m hypermobile and have scoliosis and every single muscle in my body is overactive.
But in today’s session, for the first time, he (unnecessarily in my opinion) was moving my underwear and in the process momentarily exposing my genitals for a couple seconds at a time, a couple times, while he would massage the surrounding area in my groin or pelvis. This was part of a full body “rub down” kind of massage at the end. The movements felt oddly explicit, slightly different than usual.
At the end of my session where we (fully clothed, in his sitting area) usually touch base about how I’m feeling and what he noticed about the state of my body and muscles during the session, he made a comment apologizing for the long session and that he “never gets tired” massaging me and showed concern that my boyfriend, whom he has met on several occasions, hopefully isn’t “jealous” or anything. I was going to treat the experience during my massage as professional as possible, but the comments afterwards made me feel so strange.
I will mention, I live in NYS and I know some laws are different in different places. Also will mention, he is European and I know (especially older people) feel different about nudity and especially nudity in “healthcare” situations in European countries (I’m European myself).
I keep trying to make excuses for him because I genuinely have never felt unsafe in his presence in the countless times I’ve been there. Could this just have been a weird ”in the moment” thing where he was just vibing during the massage and went too far? I just can’t shake the icky feeling I have from being so exposed and conflicted with my trust for him. This sucks that it even happened!
I’m really hoping to not open a can of worms where I get attacked here but I’m just curious and wanted to have a respectful discussion about something. I get regular massages and my massage girl used to work at a spa and I would tip her as I know that she would only probably get at best half of what the price of the massage was. Well now I’ve been seeing her at her very own business that she opened and when I go to pay with my credit card she hands me her phone and says “you just need to sign here” and it’s a line for my signature with the 3 different options for gratuity. Now I understand as a business owner she does have expenses now but I also know that her prices aren’t cheap and asking for a tip as an owner just feels tacky to me. I would have to physically press “no tip” which makes me feel like a loser so I do tip every time. Wondering if anyone knows owners of salons or spas that don’t accept tips?