u/_forever_exhausted_

I know class doesn’t matter when it comes to love, just wondering how much class and race overlaps statistically in interracial relationships. I’m wasian and I know my parents were both upper middle class. My cousin is in an interracial relationship with a woman who is also upper middle class. My boyfriend is Latino and his family is lower working class.

So 2 out of 3 personal observations were same status, different ethnicities. I’m wondering if that’s typical in general.

Tomorrow is our 4 month anniversary. Going to watch howl’s moving castle and then go to 7/11 to get macadamia nut cookies.

I feel immature. I have no real wants or goals in life. Just wanna spend time with him and see him smile.

I feel like everyone wants things. People have plans of what they want to do in life especially at this age, even if it’s a little thing. Buying something or playing a video game or going out partying or places to visit. Dont really want anything. Dont even really care if I never leave my parents house.

I’ve been depressed for as long as I can remember. The feeling lightens when I’m with him. He means so much to me that I cry sometimes.

I know he’ll never force himself onto me or pressure me into doing anything I don’t want to. Still I know he wants to have sex and idk how long he’ll be fine staying in a relationship without it.

He’s very physically attracted to me. He tells me how beautiful my face is and he loves touching my skin. He loves running his hands along the sides of my body. He squeezed my butt over my clothes while we were kissing but I told him to stop and it’s never happened again. Last time we were kissing, he told me i needed to stop because he got too turned on. I stopped ofc and we cuddled. I felt so terribly sad how I can’t reciprocate this attraction and a bit disgusted he wanted sex at all. I am decently sex-repulsed.

Just idk how long he’ll be willing to stay with me. Relationship has been almost 3 months which is longer than I expected. It seems naive to think a young man who is sexually attracted to women would be satisfied with just kissing long term.

Idk what advice I want or need. Maybe this is just a vent.

When we first got together, I told him it would be asexual, the farthest I’ll go is kissing, and to never expect anything from me. He agreed to it then and agrees to it now. He just brought it up as break between kissed.

He told me that if anything he does makes me uncomfortable, I should tell him right away. He always asks for consent to do anything. His hand were under my shirt feeling my sides as we kissed. He asked if he could touch my sides first and after a while asked about my chest and was fine when I said no. Afterward he said if my comfort level changes and anything we have done previously I don’t feel like doing again, he’ll respect it. He said making out and everything else is nice, but it’s just smth nice and it’s not required for us to be in a relationship.

I just love him a lot and kissed him harder after that. I really really lucked out.