r/twentyagers

I (F21) got rejected by a guy (M20) about three months ago. We met at uni, and he was the one that made the first moves quite quickly. Calling me pretty, asking me out and doing other flirty actions. Also said that he enjoys our ‘deep’ conversations and that he enjoys our time together. In the beginning I was hesitant even though I was attracted to him. He had a cute handsome face, cute eyes, he was about my height (5’3) which I liked. There was just something special about him, every time I would see him I would get butterflies and cuteness aggression.
Anyway, I was hesitant at first, but I decided to make some moves myself and we ended up meeting up at uni and talking. We had many things in common, had ‘deep’ conversations, but we were also very different, which I liked. He was very talkative, charismatic and goofy.
We were basically in a situationship at this point. Things happened throughout the months, he gave me hope and it felt like he was into me, but at the same time I noticed he didn’t really put any effort in to get to know me, barely texted me first. There were a lot of mixed signals. It confused me, because he flirted with me directly but it still didn’t go a step further, I kept blaming myself because I rejected him when he first had asked me out (which is when we barely knew each other), but I thought me initiating things after would redeem it. The whole thing lasted maybe 5 months, with us barely even talking.
Anyway, I decided I wouldn’t text him anymore, because it started feeling like I was the one chasing after him and he didn’t care about me at all. We hadn’t talked in 1-2 months. Then he randomly texts me one night (Mind you, a few days before our exams) and tells me that I’m beautiful and intelligent but he lacks feelings for me, he doesn’t want to hurt me and he apologizes for giving mixed signals bla bla bla… Even though I had already accepted that things wouldn’t work out between us, it hit me hard for some reason. Maybe my ego got hurt because he was the one who showed interest first and he was also the one who ended up rejecting me, he literally texted me especially to reject me even though we hadn’t talked in a while.. He didn’t even give me a chance for us to go on a date to get to know each other romantically, I was also a bit shy during our conversations because we were just getting to know each other, so it feels like I didn’t get to show my personality.
Anyway, now every time I see him or I see his name or his picture my heart hurts, and I find myself getting insecure and comparing myself to other girls, having random thoughts like: ‘If I was blonde, he wouldn’t have rejected me’ or ‘If I looked like this girl, he would have probably still pursued me’. I don’t know how to get over it. I keep overthinking the same things.
I will also probably still see him around on campus, which I’m dreading. I’m going to try to avoid him as best as I can. Our last conversation ended on a good note but I can’t help but feel upset, angry and used. Especially when I think back at all the moments where he tried getting me flustered, cause I’m a shy person, and he would laugh at my reaction. I feel like maybe he also just did it for an ego boost. Or he found someone else and texted me so I wouldn’t bother him anymore. There are so many thoughts running through my head it’s making me go crazy.
There were so many moments that I think back at, where he was straight up flirting, meanwhile he was ‘not sure’ about his feelings and apparently ‘saw me more as a friend’. I genuinely can’t trust guys anymore…

Cannot believe this has to be said. You ask or it is assault. You do not start groping someone until they tell you no. That is assault. Even if someone says oh let's kiss, that is not an invitation for sex unless they say yes. One of the members just commented to a now deleted post that he would feel someone up until they said stop. That's fucking assault! Jfc if guys could stop taking everything as an invitation to sex without asking that would be fucking great.

Its my Birthday today Redditors! 🥳🎂🎈

I need karma to post in communities; I receive karma by posting.

My mom had an appointment and she wanted me to go with her so of course I agreed to go with her. However when she was done we were heading home and we had to take a uber so while my mom was booking the uber I heard her say “ I’m not booking with this one because he’s ugly” and I’m like it’s not like you’re going to date him or something you’re literally going home so why do you care how he looks 💀. Some people are just brutal

I’m 25 now, but I honestly don’t feel like a real adult at all.

Sometimes I feel like I’m still mentally in high school. Maybe it’s because I’ve stayed in school for too long, but a lot of people I went to school with already have stable jobs, and some of them even have their own little families now.

Meanwhile I’m still studying, just kind of drifting through life day by day. I don’t really feel like I’ve taken on many “adult” responsibilities yet, and sometimes my mindset is basically just trying to enjoy myself and get through the day.

I also still have some pretty childish thoughts and habits. Like if I see a slide in a park, I genuinely want to go on it. When I’m with friends, we still mess around, chase each other, joke around and behave like teenagers sometimes.

I know there’s technically nothing wrong with enjoying these things, but when I look at other people my age, I sometimes wonder if I’ve actually grown up at all.

Does anyone else feel like this?

First it was from BusinessCringe, then Damon Cassidy, now Casey Simpson.

Any of y'all feel like you're unemployable? I do lol. I was stuck in fucking retail after finishing my computer science degree. Useless ass degree now and the skillset is obsolete with AI. What did I even take out student loans for?

I thought the point of entry level jobs was to build fucking skills. To be open minded, to be able to be criticized and improve, to be able to build work experience. But what do you do when you can't get an entry level job?

Why are we bothering to try to get jobs at this point? It's pretty clear that society will hum along with or without us. We might as well just hole up in our parents' basements and do some hobbies like painting or drawing instead. It's not like we'll be able to support ourselves.

idk, it just feels like every thing I achieve, any amount of progress i make in improving at something just feels kind of pointless because of the way I and my body looks compared to other people, both on part of things i can change, and things i can't change. it almost feels futile to try to develop new relationships with people sometimes.

people* in title

Turned 23 this year and I feel like i should be more ahead. Im working a decent day job, moved out and still feeling like im not caught up with everyone else my age... i feel like everyone's getting engaged and married and im here waiting... i know everyone isnt on the same path but like when's it my turn to get my shit together.

Anyone else feel this way?

Edit- thank you all im genuinely tweaking over nothing lol Im fine