r/twentyagers

I see it here, TikTok, instagram, and even in person of everyone claiming they’re slightly autistic. These people aren’t diagnosed/confirmed to be and there’s no such thing as semi/slightly autistic. Either you’re autistic or you aren’t. It’s not some personality quirk. And yes I am aware that there’s levels to autism, however, majority of the time this is not what people mean. What does wanting a slightly autistic partner even mean?? Just say you want someone nerdy 😭 or that you’re nerdy yourself idk💀. Ngl I’ll definitely be downvoted for this one lol

I had s*x with somebody who was HIV positive... Regret it to this day. Hbu?

I’m newly 18F and I’ve been in community college for two semesters. I graduated high school early. I started my first job around 4 months ago. It’s an easy job at my college with great coworkers and a great boss.

I’m going to be honest, I’ve been falling deeper and deeper into a depression and generally losing interest in everything.

Ive been overly self-aware for as long as I can remember. I was given access to the internet early, and learned about all the stereotypes of youth, common experiences people have, and everything like that. I would judge kids in middle school for getting into romantic relationships because i read that those usually don’t last. (I did not have friends I’m middle for obvious reasons and I barely had friends in Highschool because I became anxious around that time lol.)

I would base my behavior around what I thought I should act like at whatever age I was. And I also used to think of my life as an “experience”. Do reckless things just to say it happened to me. Use the drama of that to fuel my creative pursuits. I loved watching social drama vicariously through the few friends I had. Though tried to stay out of it myself. I found people interesting. I loved watching people change around me. Humans were interesting. Being a teenager was part of my identity. Life was a weird movie I was watching around me.

I haven’t drawn or wrote anything in months. And I’ve realized that’s because I don’t see anything interesting happening to me anymore. I don’t care about writing two characters trying to rekindle a bond, because that’s not going to happen to me anymore. Adults don’t tend to stick to complicated social dynamics.

I lost my main inspiration for creative works. And I based my identity around making creative works. I like the emotion in them. I don’t have anything to draw emotion from anymore.

I got very used to the structure I was in, too. I would make friends with teachers and play up a shy and helpful persona, so that I’d get on their good side and have more privileges. I knew how to make teachers like me. I knew I could act naive and nervous around adults as a 12-14 year old and they’d take pity on me and help me with whatever I needed. I could become a helper around 15-16 and have adults trust me more and turn a blind eye if I bent the rules.

Beyond college stereotypes and what to expect, I never found an interest in adulthood. And reading about adulthood now, I have even less of an interest in it. It looks incredibly lonely. Monotonous. Unless you have kids, which I don’t plan to have, life tends to get boring. People solidify themselves around their 30’s, and their personalities don’t change much beyond that. You don’t get to watch your peers change. Nobody’s around each other enough for any meaningful social drama to happen. So there’s nothing interesting to vicariously watch. I have fiction, but that’s not the same.

I have money now, sure. But I’ve gotten bored of that too. Nothing I do is special anymore. Because as a poor teenager, anything interesting I did was novelty. It was special. It’s not special anymore. Because I can drop $200 to go to a concert if I want. I can take myself to a water park. It isn’t special. I didn’t “get” anything. It’s just mindless entertainment so the day is less boring.

I’m just struggling to see a point beyond this.

Being a kid in school I absolutely loved summer like most of us, no school, riding bikes, and swimming was my jam. Now as an adult I think I'm starting to hate it. I hate swamp ass, sunburn, and I still gotta go to work. If anything I have been actively waiting for summer to be over. Y'all relate?

But whenever I eat dinner, I put on a video of food scenes from the Sopranos and I pretend that I'm eating the food from the show instead of the healthslop I'm eating.

I have my phone set up so that I see the spotify album arts on my phone while driving

One album art had booba on it and I looked a bit too long before realizing I was on my way off the road 🫪

I'm not even lesbian I just find em neat 💀

was supposed to go out last night but plans got changed due to weather, ended up at a Chili’s which was a bummer bc that meant I now had to pay for a meal. already stretching it thin.

got up to use the bathroom and my friends asked if I wanted to order a dessert cookie with them if the waitress came by while I was gone, said no thanks I’m good. after I came back and sat down and she came over with the cookies she looks at me and goes “you’re not having a cookie with your friends?!” I just kinda laughed and said no I’m ok but she wouldn’t drop it. literally kept going “but everyone else is, are you sure?!” “you’re the only one not having one that’s so sad!!” “You should order one too with everybody else”

they all know I’m struggling to get a job and broke as hell, I felt like I was standing up on stage getting roasted. obviously she couldn’t have known and was just trying to be friendly but it was dragged out so much it was genuinely embarrassing. basically pleading with my eyes for her to drop it while she insisted I order a 10$ cookie.

finally i like living. but idk what kinda job to be lookin for? i was in college for cs but want nothing to do with it at all whatsoever. what do yall think? what do you guys do for work?

I’m 18F and I’m currently enrolled in community college. I don’t have any remaining childhood friends. I’ve tried making friends here, but people just don’t seem interested. I’m 6 years younger then all of my coworkers. So while they’re nice company and I like talking to them, I can’t really be their friend.

I’ll be transferring to University as a junior. I plan to try to get a dorm and stay there my junior and senior year (That’s probably weird. But oh well.) However, I’m terrified that I won’t make any friends in university. Most people make their friends in freshman year. Most people would’ve already had cliques. And it’s only two years. That’s not a long time to forge a meaningful bond.

So, just looking for advice I guess. Have any of you made any long-term and meaningful friends as University transfer student? If so, how?

I can't hold hands with my friends, let alone a significant other

I can hug her, kiss her forehead and all that but hands touchy-touchy? Fingers intertwined? That is a no no. Way too embarrassing and stressful

Now she also wants lips touching. Help 😃

I do love her and try my best to show it in other ways (I think myself a thoughtful boyfriend if I do say so myself), but I think she'll eventually leave me over it. I don't know how long she'll wait for me to be ready

No, she is not a secret to my friends and family, but this is a new relationship. What do I do?

No, I won't just suck it up and kiss her. I might spontaneously disintegrate if I do and she might want me to do it again

just turned 23 today and i want to stop feeling the need to tell my parents everything. i'm always anxious that i'll be in trouble for going wherever i want or hanging with whoever i want, but i've been an adult for five years now. they don't have a tracker on me or anything, it's just that they always ask what i'm doing and who i'm with. i just want to live my life without feeling monitored or like they'll be mad that i didn't tell them every little thing.

I miss the teen years. They weren't the best, and I was depressed and severely neglected by my mom. Yet, I was surrounded by my peers who happened to be curious, open-minded and friendly. We had a lot of shared interests. We were revolving around some unimportant shit, having dramas, we lived in our small pre-adult world. Most of all, we were important to each other. People were reaching to you even if you had some problems.

Now I can't even check on most my friends because of the political climate, and I can't meet new people irl because my country is basically devastated.

All my new friends aren't as invested in being friends as I am, most of them have forgotten about my damn birthday despite actively chatting with me. Only people who knew me since ~2020 congratulated me. Well, and coworkers. They keep forgetting basic stuff about me while I'm trying to be a quality friend for them and keep myself reminded about who they are.

It truly feels like the best years are behind.

Kind of sad.

I have an incredibly important exam that I absolutely must pass, no questions asked that's due next month but I simply cannot get myself to focus.

It does not help that it's been pouring all week and I'd rather do anything than sit at my desk and study 😔✨

tips always appreciated

And today I have found gold