u/_seulgi

I feel like most SX5 descriptions tend to paint us as hopeless romantics desperate for true love, but to me, that reads more like a SO4.

In actuality, SX5s tend to look a lot more like SX7s because avarice, combined with the sexual instinct, compels the SX5 to merge with a higher ideal or cause that is typically beyond the scope of reality. Furthermore, as a SX5, some of my favorite artists are SX7s (i.e. Björk, Charli xcx, Grimes, Jane Remover, Kate Bush) because guiding their artistic expression is an emphasis on innovation and constant intellectual stimulation, which I deeply resonate with. In essence, SX5s are nonconformists. Their approach to intellectualism can be fairly bizarre, occult, and unsettling, but unlike SX7s, who can easily bounce from one idea to the next, SX5s are far more dogmatic and protective of their chosen idea or person.

In many ways, SX5 is a highly-intellectual character whose strange, lofty ideas can often transcend the SO5's ivory tower, but in addition to their ability to reach new intellectual heights, SX5s are earthly creatures who are far more in touch with their 8 line of integration than the other 5s, giving them the license to explore their erotic side as well as transform their sexuality into a major site of intellectual inquiry and exploration. A great example of this is Homura Akemi from Mahou Shoujo Madoka Magica. Her love for Madoka influenced her to chase an idea that wound up destroying and entirely upending the exploitative magical girl system.

Speaking of lines of integration, SX5s also possess many of the key traits of 7s and 8s such as raucousness, assertiveness, playfulness, novelty-seeking, eroticism, romanticism, charlatanism, and congeniality. In fact, SX5s are the most friendly, flirty, and personable among the E5 subtypes. I've personally been mistaken for an 8 (not a 4) in real life.

While the sexual instinct allows the SX5 to expand in response to the psychological constraints of avarice, the SX5 can swing to other side of the pendulum, falling into intellectual obscurity and becoming even more avaricious in an attempt to safeguard and validate their eccentric ideas, and by extension, themselves. Unlike the other E5 subtypes, who proudly assume the role of the detached observer, SX5s don't readily buy into this illusion. In fact, they are aware that self-concept and external truths are deeply intertwined, which is reminiscent of the old adage espoused by Rene Decartes, "I think; therefore, I am." There is a mutual recognition at play between ideas and identity, so the SX5s inclination to embrace such fact enables them to passionately defend not only their truths, but also the truths of the world. As such, the SX5 is more likely to reject ideas that are not fully-embodied and tethered to the real-world. This attitude can render SX5s solipsistic and delusional, but it can also make them more grounded and present in truth and reality.

In the beginning of recovery, there was a lot of stigma against my weight gain (mostly coming from my parents) that I somewhat anticipated. But now that it's been a year since I graduated from college and I'm almost 2.5 years into recovery, I get so many unsolicited comments from random people (i.e. my gynecologist and some family friends) about my level of productivity and job prospects. Most people don't truly grasp the severity of restrictive EDs, and can't even comprehend that perhaps someone who spent more than 3 months in an intensive outpatient program is perhaps not yet equipped to find a job, let alone work one, but I'm still treated like some lazy piece of shit who refuses to work. And my question is: would these same people treat cancer patients the same way? What about someone who is in rehab for drug addiction?

And the irony of it all is that the same family friend who kept badgering me about my job prospects has been a stay-at-home mom for the past couple of years. So if you can take time off work to be present with your child, why can't I delay the start of my first job to focus on my health? I feel like being in recovery has elicited a lot of envy from people who don't value their health and wellbeing to the extent that I do.

This reminds me of the story of Karen Carpenter, a pop musician from the 1970s who died from anorexia because her label didn't want her to spend what would've been a measily 3 years in treatment.

Any 5s feel like the healthier you get, the less information you hoard and the more you start to pick up on the essence of things? I feel like my logic is increasingly becoming more intuitive, and more often than not, I find myself just knowing and trusting ideas without the need for an elaborate explanation. Any thoughts on this? Is it just me as a 5w4 or does it have to do with being a 5 as whole?