Feeling completely lost after school and trying different paths
Hi everyone, I’m not sure if this is the right place to post this, but I’m feeling pretty lost and I’d really appreciate kind advice. I’m 20 years old and graduated high school last year. Looking back, my school journey has been quite unstable, and I’m struggling to figure out my direction in life.
I started in economics in the beginning of high school, but quickly realised it wasn’t for me. I then moved to an art-focused school, which suited me creatively, but I struggled there socially and personally.
After that, I continued in a lower direction in art school in my country, where I first started doing graphic design. That period was honestly one of the best experiences I’ve had in school. I learned a lot, enjoyed the work, and felt like I was actually good at something.
I’ve always also been interested in fashion and wanted to move in that direction, but switching would have meant repeating an extra year, which I felt was too much at the time, so I stayed in graphic design. And I regret it a lot because this year I spent wasting my time on choosing a major could’ve been my graduating year of fashion.
Whoever In my final year, I specialised more in fine arts, and I really loved it. It felt creative, hands-on, and I was genuinely happy during that time.
After graduating, things became more difficult.
My parents are quite strict and traditional, and they strongly expected me to continue studying. I felt pressured to go to college even though I wasn’t sure what I wanted. Because I wanted distance from home, I chose a school far away and started game design, even though I wasn’t really interested in it.
I tried it for a few weeks but couldn’t connect with it and dropped out.
After that, I tried audiovisual studies for about 1–2 months, but I realised I really struggle with long hours behind a computer and very theory-heavy studies, so I left that too. Since then, I’ve been stuck in a cycle of trying different directions and not feeling like they fit:
I tried graphic design again, but didn’t enjoy it in a school setting
I then tried communication and stayed about 2–3 months, which is the longest I’ve managed recently. I liked the social part and doing interviews, but once it became more focused on business, theory, and structured academic work, I lost motivation again
Since then, I’ve been feeling very unsure about what to do with my life.
Recently, I’ve been thinking about a few directions:
One option is applying for a scholarship to go to Korea, where I could study photography, fine arts, or fashion. I’ve started working on a portfolio, but I’m unsure because of the language barrier and because I don’t know if my parents will support it.
Another option is staying in my country and applying for fine arts while continuing to build my portfolio locally.
There is something that has consistently made me feel motivated: creating content online. I’ve been vlogging, streaming, posting reactions, and sharing my daily life. I genuinely enjoy it it makes me feel excited, and even small interactions online motivate me a lot.
Right now, I feel stuck between:
continuing education, even though nothing has fully fit so far
pursuing something creative like art, fashion, or photography (possibly abroad)
or focusing more seriously on content creation
I just don’t know which direction to take anymore, and I’m scared of choosing wrong again.