Do you have hard time feeling safe?

Background: 37m, wife 32
HHI: $400-600k where its solely on my side and my wife helps a lot with the admin side of my business
Liquid inv / cash: $2.3mil
Home: $1.8mil
Mortgage: $750k

Just a bit on my childhood maybe it matters: Growing up i was always a odd kid, i have friends but i was also getting targeted by bullies so while my highschool life was overall good i had to endure volatile moments. Being a new immigrant my mom was the sole caretake for my sibling and i since my dad had to work oversea, so she didnt have time to really teach me or talk to me. I had to handle these bullying myself or with my best friend. I never knew what “being myself” meant and had to worked on myself a lot since meeting my wife.

I only worked one job at 24 and then i jumped into entrepreneurship. That 1 job was extremely demanding and i learned a lot but also completely traumatized me because my toxic boss. So i vow to never be an employee again. While my family is middle class because they didnt agree with my path (it wasnt toxic they were supportive but still disagreed) i didnt ask for money and relied on myself and had been dirt poor when i met my wife. We are talking about worrying about a $500 credit card bill end of month that kind of poor. I grinded very very hard for 5 years to survive and eventually we stablized and can save some money. Our savings were maybe 80-100k at 30.

Then covid hit and while everyone in my field gave up I continued to grind by moving everything online. Revenue blew up 5-6x in those years and propelled my career 15-20 years ahead of schedule.

So now here we are with a beautiful child, life is good and business is going well but i still couldnt shake that survival feeling in back of my mind so i feel like whatever we have is not “safe”. Just yesterday I updated our quarterly networth calculation and saw our liquid position gone up by 350k YTD yet i still find myself thinking “ya but thats not enough if i lose my business today”

Im wondering if any self employed or business owners have similar experience and can share? Maybe my early years of grinding combined with bullying during highschool traumatized me.

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u/allbutluk — 3 days ago

How do you feel about private school?

Hey all, i know this probably varies quite a bit due to school quality but want to hear your experience regardless

We are thinking of a mid range private school in Vancouver Canada tuition is 25k a year. Money is not an issue our HHI is 400-600k a year with millions saved so its about providing options for our daughter so that she can thrive

We checked out some even more expensive schools like 50k a year but honestly whole thing from student to teacher feels snobby and every student seem to have same ethnicity and background which makes sense given the tuition

The school we looked at seem a lot more diverse, teachers and students are very warm and smart, and average class size is 16-20, with lots of extra subjects like financial literacy, coding, arts/music, etc

Our biggest concern is not academic but options for our daughter to seek her strength and develop on it. We dont believe in post secondary as only option. We are wondering if we are approaching this incorrectly and maybe public school can do all that just fine? We do have several public school teacher friends telling us private is much better for what we are seeking.

Thanks in advance

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u/allbutluk — 26 days ago

Slow down or stop saving past a certain mark?

37, wife 31. We have 2.3mil invested, home worth 1.8mil with 500k mortgage

I own my own business and makes 400-600k

After all expenses, parents, donation etc i on average puts away 100-200k

Due to kid going to private school soon and want to spend more time with our aging parents (hence more expenses) lately im thinking about reducing savings and just let portfolio grow for next few years and slowly ramp back up.

Anyone going through similar life stages also drastically lowered saving rate when kids are young?

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u/allbutluk — 1 month ago

3 yo bday party… catering help!?

Hi all

We are hosting a party for our 3 yo and we got much more rsvp than expected… most of her daycare friends are showing up plus siblings now we have maybe 25 adults and 30 kids lol

It lasts from 1030 to 1pm so obviously we will provide lunch but i have no idea how to portion the food. We plan to go to costco for sandwich platter + pizza + some snacks like cookies + drinks / water / milk

Anyone have any idea how many people we should aim for, people keep telling us a lot of the parents wont eat that much.

If you have any idea please let me know. Its our first time we feel overwhelmed!

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u/allbutluk — 1 month ago