u/alolanToxel

I'm doing electrical engineering in a public uni and I don't know if I'm built for this anymore, even though I was somewhat confident with my decision at first. We had our first day of class today and I feel like I've forgotten all my maths foundations. Our lecturer just assumes we already know what she's talking about and basically skipped through slides.

It's my first time dorming and I'm having a really hard time getting used to it. My roommates are nice enough and I have made some friends but it seems like everyone already knows someone else here except for me. It also feels like everyone is so well-adjusted and already has experience dorming from their pre-u days. I'm lucky enough to live fairly nearby and be able to go back home on some weekends, but I just feel so homesick all the time. I know this isn't anything new, but my mood fluctuates so much throughout the day. Sometimes I feel alright but then I'll get a pang of loneliness or inadequacy and I go right back to feeling shit again. I miss seeing my family every day and eating meals with them. My sister is abroad for studies this year so that distance makes all this even worse.

I keep getting a feeling of dread in the pit of my stomach thinking about the upcoming years. I know it's still really early on but I hate how permanent this feels. I'm really not ready for "adulthood" and this feels like the first major step

Hey! Just wanted to see if I could connect with anyone else who's joining the October 2026 intake as a freshie. I'll be doing electrical engineering for context. So far I haven't heard much in terms of information so it'd be nice to have people to discuss with! Feel free to send me a DM :)

i've been accepted to the october intake but haven't received any information about accommodation yet. as i'm a first year degree student i'm really hoping to receive a spot in one of the KK. For added context I'll be doing Electrical Engineering, so that'll determine which KK I get, right?

i'm a little apprehensive as someone who's never stayed in a dorm before, could you share some of your advice/experiences that are specific to UM? i'm a girl for context. i'm a little worried about the bathroom/showering situation especially hahaha :")

Thank you so much for any information!

Hello! I don't personally have BPD but one of my best friends does. Her birthday is coming up next week and like a lot of people, she has very complicated feelings about it (though amplified, as you'd imagine). I'm planning to have a small surprise birthday gathering for her the weekend after and I'm just wondering if there's anything I haven't thought out that might sour the whole thing for her. She can be hypersensitive and a small thing can throw her off pretty fast and I really wouldn't want that to happen

So far my plan is to invite her to lunch on that day (wouldn't be odd since the two of us often hang out alone) and when we get to the place, everyone else (4 of our mutual friends) is already there. I'll get a cake as well and get someone to bring it to the venue. I'm giving her her presents a week earlier on the day of her birthday to avoid any awkwardness with other people feeling obliged to get something. It's gonna be mostly low pressure and knowing her I think she'll just appreciate the effort itself and the fact that her friends gathered to celebrate her. As a safeguard I'll be letting her mum know about it in advance and find out if they'll be home that weekend. I worry about this part a little since she has a mostly bad relationship with her mother, but I don't *think* she would mind it.

I've known her for over a decade since we were kids and she's been going through a particularly bad spell recently, so I'm hoping this will help in some way. Any advice or suggestion is appreciated!

There's a common sentiment I see online in BPD spaces about how DEEPLY they feel and how to them, a breakup/losing a friendship is comparable to and even surmounts the grief us regular plebeians feel over genuinely losing someone to death. It's just so ridiculous and egotistical. I know at this point I shouldn't even be surprised but BPD always finds a way to shock me. I'm so tired of my pwBPD sharing this sentiment and equating it to my actual grief, even when indirectly. I just feel so angry.