u/aphrodiseinthetown

I've been diagnosed with bpd since i was 14 and now I'm 20, an age i thought i would never reach and i've in therapy and I've been hospitalized too.

My last therapist gave me some ways to deal with my bpd and the symptoms and told me it's over and now i have to try and do this on my own and he cut me off meds too because of some problem with addiction, it worked for a while but it just keep getting worse and worse and i feel like I can't do anything about it anymore

I have a great partner now who helped a lot without even knowing it but i feel like I'm losing him too and not just losing my mind, therapy in my country is not really good and i don't know what to do anymore.

Usually i find some bad habit that just help me a little to not end myself but nothing seem to work anymore and it's affecting everything in my life, I'm really tired and i don't know what to do and i just keep thinking on ending everything to rest a little.

My very lovely boyfriend usually helps me with this but i feel like i keep on repeating the same thing over and over and he is not responsible for my mental health being fucked so i genuinely have no idea

Can i be cured? I'm tired and i really can't do this any longer

Does anyone know anything? Any tips or advice anything because i really can't keep going like this. I'm just tired