i think my boyfriend is genuinely stupid. how can i help him
my boyfriend is 20 we have been together for almost 9 months. it seems like in everything he does he messes up in some way. he’ll put stuff down on the ground in front of him to do something and then immediately trip over it when he moves. if he’s cooking and needs to come to a different room he’ll bring the food he’s preparing with him instead of leaving it in the kitchen. he doesn’t hold the door for people in stores- yesterday a family was walking into a store and the father held the door open for the rest of the family and my bf kinda just ran thru them to get out of the store (??). he’s super clumsy and always injures himself and sometimes me by accident. he is a terrible driver, it seems like almost every time i get in the car with him we almost get into an accident, i’ve been noticing just how bad it is recently since i don’t have a car anymore and he drives me a lot of places. one time we were getting on a train and one of the train workers was standing by the door and instead of asking him to move he tried to push himself through the gap to get inside (this failed obviously). he doesn’t understand math very well, in late 2025 he was taking a course that was basically like algebra 1 and 2 combined and he just could not grasp it. math skill isn’t an indicator of intellect of course but still. he is in college and gets good grades but he cheats on most stuff, especially math assignments.
he just seems to have a lack of basic common sense. i suspect he is on the autism spectrum. his whole family has autism so this may have just been the way he was brought up. i always tell him to try to be more aware but nothing seems to help. i love him and he’s the sweetest but i don’t want him to always make his life harder for himself by making dumb choices.