u/avocadoeverything_

i'm genuinely so sick of this and just want to be done. like i've lost enough weight that i'm relatively happy with the way my body looks, i'm close to my goal anyway but maybe this is the ocd side of me - i'm just not comfortable recovering UNTIL i've reached that number.

i've been restricting for the past few months and went from >!135 lbs to 110 lbs!< and i genuinely just can't be bothered to give a shit anymore. (and when i say recover i mean maintenance anyway, not like gaining back all the weight i've lost).

but i can't help thinking if i just go a LITTLE longer, imagine seeing that number on the scale!!! but in the past when i've pushed it too far, i just end up crashing out and binging it all back anyway. also i just want to enjoy the few weeks of summer i have before i have to lock in at my internship. ugh pls help

i’m not asking for advice (although it would be appreciated), i’m just annoyed asf bc why do i have to deal with these symptoms WHEN IM NOT EVEN UNDERWEIGHT. and yes i know it can happen at any point but it still feels invalidating asf like let me liveeeee.

anyway rant over, im starting my summer internship in 2 weeks so until then i will be chugging electrolytes and vitamins. wish me luck 🥰🥰