u/baileyandsnow

I'm considering bringing the idea of fostering up to my partner, but I'm not 100% sure I know enough about it to even do that. I've been in social work in the behavioral healthcare field for about fifteen years, but I've mainly worked with adults, not kids.

I do know if we do decide to do this, I'd lean strongly towards providing emergency respite care to adolescents whose carers need a break and who need a safe place for the kids too.

What would y'all say is the top five to ten most important questions for us to answer to know if this would be beneficial to the kids to have us as carers, even short term.

(PS: I do have trauma informed care training and practice as a mental health professional in the US. I have also already (informally, not legally yet) adopted two of my son's friends as teens when they needed a safe place to stay and a safe mom to be loved by, so I can absolutely love children with trauma and behavioral issues like my two new kids. They were both in foster situations and the court just kind of...didn't care(?) that they were staying with me the last year of high school so I could make sure they graduated.)

I super appreciate any assistance. I am new to using reddit for anything beyond reading nosleep, so if I'm doing anything wrong by posting this, I'd love to know what I did and (if not obvious ofc!) the reason it's not allowed please? (Like, is it breaking a rule, or maybe there's a folder or page or something I can go to in order to teach myself that I missed?) Thanks!!!!!

I have this reaction to stress and weirdly, a specific adhesive, that is the same every time; well, until this time. Usually I get instant itching on my chest around the collarbones that travels to cover my neck, and then my face, right side then left, eventually moving into my eyelids, ear canals, and throat. At that point, I head to the ER because only the trifecta shots (benadryl, pepcid, and steroid) work at that point.

Now, the first ER trip calms it down so I don't go full anaphylactic. Then I usually need one to two more trips there over day 2 (and 3, if it takes that long) for the flare to stfu and go away for a few days-weeks. I have 9 different medications I take daily for this, with three rescue meds for this and a neurological disorder I have as well. (I'm falling apart at the beginning of middle age because the body keeps the score, and I got forcefully unalived right in the "What's trauma?" growing up/in my marriage to an abuser who literally looks like Kangroo Man.)

So, this flare started the same but became MADDENING much more quickly. I am in severe pain this time too, so I hail burro to the nearest place, a standalone ED about twenty minutes away. They get me back fast, IV started, and the lovely nurse had the "Don't Die" shots in the line faster than I could spit. Lovely man, 10/10, would get shots from him again.

So, I'm here at home on day three of this flare, and due to a variety of "out of my control, bub" reasons, I've been unable to get back to the ED, or any facility, without a weeyoo wagon, and no, if I'm not actively looked for a Bic pen to start a tracheotomy to breathe again, I'm not risking a bill from those guys. I was thankfully able to get Prednisone in 20 my format (whoopwhoop!) And have been downing those like candy along with my good buddy, Benny the Antihistamine and his friend, Peppy Sid.

However, it's now extremely painful, itchy wheals all over my upper chest, neck, and face. I know I need to hit up that sweet, sweet ED again, but that's not the question.

My question is how to NOT get to this point?!?! Mm y allergist is kind of ass, so I don't bother asking him anything.