u/baldndhandsome-blr

Caught my wife cheating on me behind my back 2 years ago. World instantly turned upside down. Consciously stayed away from home that day to not create a scene in front of my daughters and mom. My initial and instant decision was to stay in the marriage for the kids sake. Didn't want my wife's image go down in front of the kids as moms are supposed to be the person who can do no wrong from the kid's perspectives. Revealing it to them would scar them for life. Revealing it to my elder mom was not what she deserves to know at 80. It would traumatise her too. Wife begged for forgiveness and we had our initial months of turbulence. Made a conscious decision to not remind her of it regularly, this resulted in me silently imploding. In 2 years she is back to her ways of ranting, threatening to walk out of the house for trivial issues with my mom (who is also tough nut at 80). She doesn't acknowledge that I am still in the same shitty hole she pushed me into, only that I am not expressing but have become a smoking addict. She has locked her phone which again doesn't give me any reassuring signal. She has slowly made herself and the kids as 1 unit, who would move out together. Says dont rake up old things(affair), which for me definitely not "old things" and infact is fresh in my mind. The table turning in this 2 years where she begged me to being a dictator threatening me to of walk outs- is disheartening. I feel like being betrayed twice over. Is it that I am a fool to stay in the marriage? I am that typical guy who built his life with family as supporting pillars. Seeing everything including me crumbling. Wanted ladies perspective in this

Caught my wife cheating on me behind my back 2 years ago. World instantly turned upside down. Consciously stayed away from home that day to not create a scene in front of my daughters and mom. My initial and instant decision was to stay in the marriage for the kids sake. Didn't want my wife's image go down in front of the kids as moms are supposed to be the person who can do no wrong from the kid's perspectives. Revealing it to them would scar them for life. Revealing it to my elder mom was not what she deserves to know at 80. It would traumatise her too. Wife begged for forgiveness and we had our initial months of turbulence. Made a conscious decision to not remind her of it regularly, this resulted in me silently imploding. In 2 years she is back to her ways of ranting, threatening to walk out of the house for trivial issues with my mom (who is also tough nut at 80). She doesn't acknowledge that I am still in the same shitty hole she pushed me into, only that I am not expressing but have become a smoking addict. She has locked her phone which again doesn't give me any reassuring signal. She has slowly made herself and the kids as 1 unit, who would move out together. Says dont rake up old things(affair), which for me definitely not "old things" and infact is fresh in my mind. The table turning in this 2 years where she begged me to being a dictator threatening me to of walk outs- is disheartening. I feel like being betrayed twice over. Is it that I am a fool to stay in the marriage? I am that typical guy who built his life with family as supporting pillars. Seeing everything including me crumbling. Wanted ladies perspective in this.

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