r/AskIndianWomen

For me, it’s:

* the Russian 6000 rupees joke

* joking about scenes that objectify women in movies, or joking about red light areas and sex workers

* calling a slightly older woman “aunty,” even as a joke

(I know it’s a Gen Z thing to call someone “unc” as a joke, but unfortunately this feels different to me because I’ve noticed they specifically want to pull women down because of their age, as if being an older woman is somehow an insult.)

* joking about the type of clothes a woman wears and judging her character because of it.

* Any joke that is about people‘s suffering or directed against an oppressed group.

Ladies, please drop your list.

My mom has three children: two daughters and one son. Recently, my brother and I were casually joking that since his exams didn’t go too well, maybe he should just marry a rich family friend and move in with her parents.

My mom immediately said, “How can I send my son away to someone else’s house? I only have one son.” (“Ek hi toh beta hai mera.”)

What hurt me is that she never reacted this way when my sister and I got married and left home. There was never any sadness or resistance about us leaving. But the idea of her son moving away was suddenly unacceptable.

That comment genuinely stung. It made me wonder if she subconsciously sees her daughters as “less her children” than her son. We used to be extremely close and talked every day, but after that conversation, I just haven’t felt the same. I’ve reduced our calls to once a week, pretending I’m busy because I don’t know how to explain why I’m hurt.

Am I overreacting for being this affected by one comment?

So basically, I've started consuming porn around a month ago, and now I’m doing it regularly (but I’m not addicted to it, i mostly do it out of boredom). Still, I feel like it’s a bad habit and might mess with my brain in the long run…..who knows.

Sooo, is there any app or anything that’ll help me go on a “diet” (a porn diet 😭)? Okay jokes aside, give me some tips girliesss…

Creeps stay away!

Today is my birthday and no one cares. The so called friends whose birthday I always remember, my parents who didn't even get me a cake because birthdays are apparently "earned", and my best friend who might not even remember what day it is.

No matter how much I try to tell myself that it's okay or I don't need those, I am fu*king miserable. It has been like this for almost three years now, nobody, none that I consider friends even message me and I am always making plans, celebrating their birthdays.

It makes me feel so lonely and not good. I haven't been able to stop crying since morning and my mother's who was complaining about my "attitude" now wants to out for dinner!!

How bad it is that I just don't wanna wake up on this day and skip right through it? Because I hate it absolutely.

Am I just being childish?

I'm gonna melt istg

I am an 18f and my mom and dad are married for nearly 19 years now. My dad is verbally abusive and also beats my mom.

I also have twin brothers who are 7 year olds. My dad has been hitting my mom since a long time now , but this last one month is getting worse everyday.

My dad just sold our house and suddenly he has a lot of money in his bank account which is part of the reason why his attitude has changed suddenly.

My mom is not working either. So she cant support all three of us. Today we were supposed to go out for a party and when I came back from my coaching today , I was so sad to see my brothers crying and my mom ready to leave the house, but she cant leave alone either , because my brothers were crying very much. He hit her a lot. He was practically straggling her all because my mom refused to dye his hair again because few of his hair were still white. She said ki me naukar thodi hu , and then my mom said he started hitting her.

I am telling her to divorce him and ask for alimony and also we are going to get a new house worth more than 2 cr this year before diwali. I am asking her to take that too under her name, Me and my brothers are ready to speak in favor of my mom wherever necessary.

I dont know what to do at all, but I cant see my mom crying either. He ruined her birthday too on 6th may. Please help me out , what should I do?

so i have this friend in college, and shes a little weird, this one fine day i came across her and we were talking sbout something and i suddenly said that "look at my pants these are my favourite pants" . she out of nowhere put her both fists into the pocket of these loose track pants and tears a it from the pocket in the middle of the college hallway. so ofc i got really shocked on what she did . after that she said she will get it fixed. i took it to the tailor and the dude said that since it tore from the pocket it cannot be repaired and it will tear again if i put some weight on my pocket. so i asked her to pay me 2000 for it since that was its MRP it was a very cutesy pants from westside and those were my favourite and she tore it off. when i asked her to pay it back she just said " im not gonna oay u back or repair it what ru gonna do sbout it" . so i just called her mother and asked her to pay it vback. as they say seed doesnt fall far from the tree just refused. what do i do about this

My brother can come home at midnight, skip family functions, not know how to cook, and nobody says a word. I come home at 9pm once and it becomes a family meeting. I genuinely want to understand — did any of you find a way to call this out at home without it turning into a massive fight? Because I'm tired of adjusting for people who never adjust for me.

I’m 23 and honestly very confused about my career and future. My mother died when we were kids, and growing up without her affected all of us badly. We are four siblings, my father raised us alone while doing a normal job, and our family environment has always been emotionally difficult.

I used to work a regular job but left because it was toxic. After that I started working in crypto/Web3, but due to market conditions and bad timing, most of my money got stuck and now I’m financially unstable again.

I want to build a stable career and become independent, but I genuinely don’t know what path to take anymore. I also don’t see myself wanting marriage or a traditional life because of what I’ve seen growing up.

People who were once lost in life, how did you figure out your career path and rebuild yourself?

People please stop having unprotected sex and then panicking every month.

Every other post is “period late”, "he pulled out but I'm not sure". I understand hormones and lust but putting on a condom takes literally 10 seconds. Sex at a young age exposes you to unwanted STDs and HPV as well..

Secondly, why TF do you guys take contraceptives like candy ? It's called Plan B for a reason!! Plan A is protection!! Get a spine and ask your partner to wear protection, or get a copper IUD or prescribed birth control.

And honestly, if the thought of pregnancy scares you that much, then maybe you shouldn’t be having sex in the first place.

Please protect yourselves.

I was scrolling reels and came across a clip from The Sword in the Stone. It was actually a very sweet/sad scene. A boy gets turned into a squirrel, a female squirrel falls for him, and then he turns human again and she gets heartbroken. It made me miss older cartoons because they feel much calmer and softer compared to a lot of current kids content. I was thinking of watching some old animated movies with my niece. Then I went into the comments to find the movie name and someone had commented “squirrel condom gif”.

I searched it very absentmindedly on Google because I genuinely thought it was going to be one of those random absurd internet memes people spam in the comments. Like “toilet rizz” level nonsense. I had absolutely no idea what it actually referred to and didn’t even think twice before searching it.

Instead it was a real dead squirrel with a condom coming out of its private part. It genuinely disturbed me and I instantly regretted searching it. What shocked me even more was seeing people joke about it and find it funny. I know dark humour exists online, but sometimes I feel like people have become way too comfortable making memes out of disturbing or disgusting things, especially involving animals.

This might sound dramatic, but it honestly ruined my mood for quite a while. It’s such a weird feeling when you open the internet for something wholesome and suddenly end up seeing something disturbing for no reason at all. Does this happen to anyone else or do I just get affected by these things too easily?

Looking at the recent news around dowry deaths and the ongoing discussions, this question came to my mind and I thought of asking here.

I am unmarried and honestly I don’t have much idea about how these things practically happen during marriages. I have heard from some friends that in wedding of xyz the groom's side clearly refused to take anything but at the same time the bride’s family, out of their own will, still gifted something to the groom.

So I wanted to understand, in such situations, what is considered right? Should the groom completely refuse everything? And what if parents voluntarily want to give something to their daughter (say money, jewellery, etc.) after marriage, is that also considered wrong?

Basically, should there be absolutely no give and take at all? Or is there a distinction between dowry and what relatives/parents call “shagun” or voluntary gifts?

Genuinely asking to understand the social and practical side of this better.

Hey, I don't really belong here. I've been following this Twisha murder case. It has genuinely provoked me into dwelling deeper. I'm so infuriated however by the social media opinions by a bunch of misogynist, culturally repressive randoms online. They are apparently condemning Trisha for having relationships before marriage, and I'm not talking about her MIL being objectionable about it. It's a bunch of randoms on the internet self-proclaimed intellectuals. According to them, she was rightfully slutshamed etc. there are gruesomely infuriating comments. Imma post some of these for you to get a better idea and then I can ask my follow up question. I want to know y'all's opinion, like any sort of perspective on these things.

These were comments under the post of that Trisha suicide case. And, I'm honestly quite astonished by how condescending and contemptuous it sounds:

1. "A girl doing promiscuous behaviour before marriage & mother in law can't talk about it? In which world that happens? Past will haunt all till eternity, just because you got married past does not become past, it creates havoc for future too. Reap what you sow"

2. "You should ask the lady who brought her promiscuous behaviour first. No, man's past will haunt him too. Once you want to punish someone they will use all things to save themselves. Who is right or wrong neither you nor I can decide. Making MIL villain & a dead women angel is wrong"

The condescending tone of these comments is quite gripping(this is not even the worst stuff). I don't understand how sexual history is a contamination of a person's character. And what genuinely infuriates me is how easily society dehumanizes women for simply existing on their own terms. So basically my question is, I want to ask everyone regarding their own opinions of it, doesn't this infuriate you? how easy it is to dehumanize relationships you will talk with someone and people will instantly throw all sorts of derogatory terms. And you know the fucking hypocritic disgusting indian society. If i support you as a man, confidently say I absolutely don't mind what my partner ever did in her pasts, the whole society will call me "cuck".

Few of the only societies in the world, where people forcefully and coercively marry someone, have sexual intercourse which is equivalent to one night stand cause you barely even know each other but apparently they will regard it as the most morally correct act.

Hello all, I’m F23, and lately I’ve been having uncomfortable thoughts around marriage. First of all, my family is very loving.

I’ve never been thought of in a transactional light, and no one forces me to marry, let alone get married by a certain age. I personally don’t want to marry before 30.

But I’m not sure why I hate the feeling around it. Even if I marry someone I love, and he and his family are liberal, the feeling that society starts seeing me as a married woman rather than as the person I am bothers me.

Even now, if my mother has relatives calling her, no matter how liberal, sophisticated, or educated they seem, they ask her to give the phone to her husband or my father before they properly talk to her

It’s such minor things, that imply a woman’s individual identity blurs once she becomes a married woman, and that she has no life outside of it. That is what worries me.

What can I do to help overcome this feeling?

I live a small society complex which is often considered on mid end lux in my sector so here people like everything on their door step, hence delivery guys, work help etc are here 24/7 day and night .

Im 19 , Sometimes when I'm wearing shorts/cute tops or wearing a bathrobe and costume underneath and I see the lift has male workers who are not older so boys or maybe 25 below . I skip it . I don't make a scene or ask to step out . Or when they are waiting with me I don't move and let them go.

Again I don't do this will all of them instantly, if I feel their stare on me for too long or if the guys look at me and then at each other , that's like siren going off in my head 🚨🚨 and I skip that lift.

I DONT DO THIS WITH AND WOMEN OR GIRLS and DOG WALKERS, infact i step out to give them space going up cause they have work to do and I can wait for couple minutes more .

So is it classist of me ? We have two lifts .. one is of residents and other is common but no one really implements that, should I be the bitch and say "this is residents only" ??

Please help me with my dilemma 🥺🫰🏻

EDIT- TYSM TO EVERYONE ..you guys really made me see clearly through this situation, the conclusion - they don't really care , and it's alright if I skip the lift and I'm overthinking it 🫰🏻💗

(note- I was lowkey afraid of this sub cause of the hot bs in other groups where they said this sub is hateful etc etc and all but this was the most geniune experience I have ever had , such a nice and kind community. Also the fact I felt safe posting this here without a second thought of being judged even though I never even been this active here🫶🏻.. I'm pinning this group on my search bar and blocking the rest . 😭LOVE YALL 💗🫰🏻)

So, I was thinking about something and felt like sharing it.

I’ve seen a lot of girls asking for advice about periods and related topics, and it made me realize how little schools actually teach us about our own bodies. I still remember when I got my first period. Our school had organized this session for girls about periods and “women’s health,” but honestly, I didn’t understand anything properly.

The only thing I really took away from it was: if it’s red, you’re on your period, and that periods are supposedly the body “cleaning out waste.” That’s it. Nobody properly explained ovulation, eggs, hormones, pregnancy, or how the menstrual cycle actually works. We watched period ads and short awareness videos every year till 12th grade, but they never really explained the female body in a meaningful or practical way.

Because of that, I started searching things online and talking to friends who were studying science or biology. That’s when I finally began understanding how pregnancy and menstrual cycles actually work. And honestly, even now there are still things I don’t fully understand, so I end up Googling them or going on Reddit to hear from people who’ve experienced similar things.

I genuinely feel schools and parents need to be much more open and detailed when teaching girls about their bodies. Basic awareness isn’t enough when it’s something we experience every month and something directly connected to our health.

What do you all think?

Hello

Hoping to get some perspective from women here who’ve navigated something similar.

I’m a Computer Engineering graduate who joined Amazon straight out of college and spent 8.5 years growing from Customer Service Associate to Subject Matter Expert and Quality Analyst. Looking back, I was practically doing Business Analyst work the entire time. Process documentation, SOP authorship, quality audits, stakeholder management, ops analytics, just never had the BA title to show for it.
Was laid off in January 2026.

Since then I’ve been upskilling seriously. Power BI, SQL, ECBA certification in progress and targeting Business Analyst roles in Pune/Mumbai. On paper the transition makes sense. Practically, it’s been a lot to navigate. Job search, new household responsibilities as a recently married woman, and rebuilding confidence after a long tenure at one place.

My questions for this community:

How did you mentally handle the gap between jobs especially when you were doing everything right but results were slow?

Did you ever feel judged for a non-linear career path? How did you respond?

Any advice specifically for women pivoting into analyst/corporate roles in India?

Open to mentorship, referrals, or just a conversation.

I recently saw a reel where one indian man was telling indian girls lack communication skills and foreign womens are better in communication and others skills than indian women . I don't have any problem if he prefers foreign women but why does he has to drag down indian women and what's even funny is all men in comment section were behaving like all have been with foreign women and indian women are as hell and they are the one who are unlucky to have indian women and not foreign like women in india .

This really drags our image down and what's your views on it ?

Watching Desi Bling honestly felt like watching patriarchy wrapped in luxury branding. The unmarried women Laili, Alizey, and Tejaswi were the only ones who seemed self-aware and willing to question the dynamics around them.

Most of the married women came across as deeply conditioned to worship their husbands and tolerate behavior they normally wouldn’t accept like they had to be ok seeing their husbands go to parties with girls every weekend.

The “raja beta” mentality was everywhere especially with men like Dyuti, who was emotionally absent as a father yet blamed his wife for not being there for his kids because his mom said so, while he could casually lie and party with other women and his wife is supposed to be ok with this. His wife Iryna, although outwardly modern, ultimately represented the archetype of a financially and emotionally dependent housewife trapped in a toxic marriage. What stood out was how casually her complaints about him were dismissed by Dyuti, largely because he held the financial power in the relationship and could threaten divorce at any moment.

Satish and Tabinda’s relationship looked “stable” on the surface but felt incredibly toxic underneath. Tabinda used to pedicure/manicure her husband almost worshipping him, would turn a blind eye to him partying. The worst moment was when she secretly went to Karan Kundra and asked him to reconsider proposing to Tejaswi, simply because Teja held up a mirror to their behavior and called out Karan hanging around Satish as a bad influence. Funny part was when Pam warned Tabinda about Satish being spotted with another woman multiple times, Tabinda only cared about society finding out her husband was cheating. Her insecurity was even more obvious when she instantly said “No” to her stepson inheriting the business. It really showed how dependent marriages can make women feel insecure and threatened.

Most men enjoyed being worshipped or controlling their wives while women were ok being gold-diggers.

Pam was another huge red flag for me living off an ex-boyfriend while acting like it was normal while the ex-boyfriend still felt entitled to dictate when she could start dating other men again. The whole dynamic was just bizarre to watch.

Overall, the show felt like patriarchy wrapped in glamour and parties. Many of the marriages came across as transactional, exposing the unhealthy dynamics often present in transnational relationships.

YUCKKK!

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