r/AskIndianWomen

I'm(25f) an South indian born woman raised in India and came to Europe for Masters and stayed back for a job.

I’m asking specifically about dating white/European men because realistically they make up the biggest dating pool around me.

This isn’t a “white men vs Indian men” thing. I’m just trying to understand whether I’m unnecessarily limiting myself by mostly thinking about Indian/arranged-marriage prospects.

Personally I've dated a white man. Lasted for 7-8 months. I started discussing the next step of our relationship (marriage) because that's how it works in India right? I plan now for the next 2 years? He called it off and called it a cultural difference. And it's not that he was unserious. Genuinely here where I live, I see people who never get married and have kids. I think it's because of some legal issues and there's no stigma around unmarried couples.

Arranged marriage hasn’t really been working for me. The pool is already pretty limited because of family/community restrictions, and most of the prospects I’ve been shown either, there’s simply no attraction. If I may be bold, I feel like they're not groomed enough.

So I tried dating apps instead.

And holy shit, it’s exhausting.

I’m looking for an actual relationship that could eventually lead to marriage. I like getting to know someone slowly, building trust and genuinely liking each other before things become physical.

But my experience on apps has mostly been:

People who say they want a relationship but clearly have no idea what they want.

Guys who seem interested for 2–3 dates and then suddenly expect sex.

- People with major commitment issues.

- Endless “let’s see where it goes” situations.

- Conversations that disappear out of nowhere.

People who want all the intimacy of a relationship without actually committing to one.

I’m not expecting someone to discuss marriage on date one lol. I just want to date people who are at least dating with the intention of eventually finding a life partner, rather than treating dating as an endless cycle of short-term connections.

So Indian women who live in Europe and have dated white/European men seriously. What has your experience been?

Did you find cultural differences around marriage, family, commitment, timelines, etc. difficult?

Were the men you dated generally open to marriage, or did you also run into the whole “I don’t know what I want” culture?

How did your Indian parents react if the relationship became serious?

And most importantly: where did you actually meet men who wanted genuine long-term relationships?

Dating apps? Friends? Work? Hobbies? Indian/expat circles? Just randomly in real life?

At this point I’m genuinely wondering whether I’m searching in the wrong places rather than there being something wrong with my expectations.

I don’t care whether the person is Indian or European at this point. I just want mutual attraction, compatibility, kindness, commitment and someone who actually wants to build a life with another person.

Where do you even start looking for that in Europe?

It was my 18th birthday yesterday. I wanted a quiet night and did not invite any of my frnds as I was feeling a bit disconnected lately. They surprised me around 7pm. I was genuinely glad to see them. We clicked photos and had a great time. My parents invited them to dinner at a restaurant. The bill went around 5000 rupees. A bit costly but my parents didn't mind. I went home and opened up the gifts they had brought.

One of them was a child bracelet with beads that you get for 20 rs in the market. A black evil eye bracelet worth 10rs. A cheap necklace that breaks the 1st time you wear. A bouquet that was of plastic flowers that you put in the vase.

This was what they had collectively gifted as a group of 5 people.

I might sound ungrateful but I am not. They are not poor and a little weak financially. They spend absurd amount of money on trinkets. That they dont even need.

I feel bad that I am feeling this way but I dont know how to react anymore. Pls help

AI has been used to keep things vague and not hinder our privacy. It was all over the place. And this is going to be a long one.

I (27F) married my husband (30M) last year through an arranged-marriage setup.
I wasn’t completely dependent on the arranged setup, though. I was still using dating apps because I hadn’t given up on finding someone myself. That’s how I met my husband.
We met twice. On our third date, I asked him if he’d meet my parents because of some circumstances at home. He agreed. I wasn’t even completely sure about him at that point, so I asked my parents to meet him and tell me whether they thought he was a good guy and whether I should take it further.
What attracted me to him was that he was hardworking, ambitious, caring, family-oriented, financially independent from his father and, honestly, I found him very attractive.
Initially, everything seemed fine.
Then I started seeing small things with his mother.
When we went to choose my engagement outfit, she disliked almost everything I liked. Eventually, she agreed to a very sober ₹16,000 outfit. It wasn’t terrible, just much duller than what I would have chosen for myself. My husband asked me if I was happy with it and I said yes.
The same thing happened with jewellery. His mother wanted her son to buy her jewellery that was bigger/more expensive than mine. She got a ring, earrings and a set. I didn’t make an issue of it because I knew she’d given up a lot of her own jewellery for the family in the past, and I genuinely felt she deserved to have some nice things.
Then there was an incident involving my acne and medication.
I had developed severe acne very suddenly because of stress, and my MIL insisted I see a homeopathy doctor. During the appointment, she started discussing my anti-anxiety medication in front of the doctor in a way that made me extremely uncomfortable.
She already knew about my medication before the roka. My husband had told her because he believed she’d understand, especially because mental-health treatment had existed in their own family.
My mother eventually had to speak to them about it. Things seemed resolved, but my MIL kept bringing it up repeatedly afterward.
Then came the wedding.
At my mehendi, my MIL and SIL showed up with no makeup at all, which seemed strange at the time. At the wedding, my MIL wore a saree in almost the same colour as mine and one of my jewellery sets. It honestly didn’t bother me because I was the bride and I wasn’t worried about being upstaged.
The real problems started immediately after the wedding.
My SIL left for college the day after the wedding, and from literally day one, my MIL started checking our rooms, our belongings, our Blinkit/Swiggy orders, etc.
Even on our honeymoon, I was constantly told not to buy things. It was embarrassing because I come from a financially comfortable family and wasn’t used to being monitored over relatively normal spending.
Within two weeks, things became extremely stressful.
My MIL would regularly shout about how we were wasting “her” money.
She and my SIL would wait for my husband to come home and then immediately start fighting with him before he could even come to me. I would be sitting in another room listening to them scream at each other about old family issues.
Food became another issue. MIL wouldn’t ask the cook to accommodate small things I asked for, like grinding tomatoes or certain masalas. When I started cooking for myself, that somehow became an issue too because my MIL said I was “separating kitchens.”
My monthly appointments were called “gulchare uda rahi hai.”
Going on a work trip with my husband was called “ayaashi.”
We were kicked out of the house three times within approximately 3.5 months of marriage.
Every time, my parents would come, bring us back, and try to resolve things.
At one point, my MIL even kicked her own son out in the middle of the highway during an argument. She drove back home and left him there; he had to take a cab back.
The final time we were asked to leave, my parents came over and everyone sat down to talk.
My SIL, who had been away for around three months, happened to return home around the same time.
During that conversation, I heard my MIL and SIL discussing the net worth of my family.
At that point, my parents helped us move into an apartment they owned as an investment.
While my parents were helping us establish a separate home, my in-laws continued calling and harassing us.
Eventually, my husband converted their assets to a rental income of 2L a month.
After that, the calls stopped.
His sister refused Rakhi/Tikka.
My MIL refused to do her part for my first Karwa Chauth.
For months, they would call around 10:30 at night and create another issue.
And somewhere in all of this, my marriage started disappearing.
Initially, sex wasn’t even part of the problem.
But I was under so much stress that I lost around 8 kg in three months.
I became angry, irritable and constantly on edge.
I started saying no to sex because my husband would often come to our room immediately after a massive fight with his family — fights I could literally hear from the other room.
I couldn’t switch from hearing people scream at him/us to suddenly feeling emotionally and sexually connected to him.
Over time, I became distant.
We’ve now been living away from his family for around 1 year 2 months.
I thought things would eventually settle.
Then one day, his family called him and abruptly started abusing me over ₹6 lakh. It was for a loan repayment of the assets they were enjoying with a rental income.
That was my breaking point.
Something inside me just broke.
My trust, patience and whatever love I still felt started collapsing.
The anger between my husband and me escalated after that, although it has never become physical.
We’re now about 1.5 years into our marriage and I genuinely don’t feel like myself anymore.
The biggest problem is that I don’t trust my husband.
I feel like whatever he told me about his family before marriage turned out to be untrue or incomplete. There have been lies, and now I can’t distinguish between what is true and what isn’t.
My mother keeps telling me, “Men don’t know anything before getting married.” Maybe that’s partly true. Maybe he genuinely didn’t understand what his family was capable of.
But I don’t know if ignorance is enough to repair what happened.
And this is where I’m completely stuck.
I don’t know if I’m still in love with him.
I don’t think I’m attracted to him in the same way anymore, although I still want sex. I just can’t seem to have it with him.
I don’t know whether that’s because I’ve lost attraction or because I’ve associated him with everything that happened.
I also feel guilty about wanting to leave.
His parents kicked him out too. If I leave, where does he go?
But at the same time, I know I can’t stay married to someone simply because I’m afraid of what will happen to him if I leave.
I’ve had to move geographically, build a home, take care of the house, cook because I don’t like other people cooking for me, raise a puppy, deal with loneliness and essentially rebuild my entire life.
I’ve also developed some unhealthy coping mechanisms. I’m constantly on my phone, I’ve been smoking weed heavily, I cry a lot, sulk, feel angry and have very little motivation.
And the saddest part is that I don’t recognise myself anymore.
I also can’t imagine having a child with my husband anymore.
It’s not even about the child itself. I don’t want his mother anywhere near that part of my life. I don’t want anything to do with her or her orbit — and unfortunately, her son is part of that orbit.
At the same time, I know my husband and I were probably the two people most affected by his family’s behaviour.
The fights weren’t ours.
The original problems weren’t ours.
But we’re the ones living with the consequences.
And that breaks my heart.
I don’t know if there is still a marriage here to save, or if I’m just holding on because I feel guilty about leaving someone who has already lost his family.
How do I figure out whether I’ve actually fallen out of love with my husband, or whether I’m emotionally shut down because of everything that happened?
And if you’ve been through something similar — where your in-laws caused enormous damage to your marriage — how did you know whether the marriage itself was over or whether it could still be rebuilt?
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TL;DR: I (27F) have been married to my husband (30M) for 1.5 years. Shortly after the wedding, my MIL/SIL became controlling and hostile—monitoring our spending, criticising my cooking and outings, interfering constantly, and kicking us out 3 times in 3.5 months. My parents eventually helped us move out, but his family continued harassing us and later abused me over ₹6 lakh.
The constant conflict caused me severe stress, weight loss, resentment and emotional disconnection. I stopped wanting sex with my husband, especially after hearing him fight with his family, and over time I stopped trusting him because I feel many things he told me before marriage were lies or incomplete truths.
We’ve been away from his family for 1 year 2 months, but I still don’t feel like myself. I’m lonely, angry, withdrawn and have developed unhealthy coping habits. I still want sex, but I can’t seem to have it with him. I can’t imagine having children with him because I want absolutely nothing to do with his family.
My husband has also been hurt by his family, and I feel guilty about leaving because they kicked him out too. But I’m starting to wonder whether I’ve simply fallen out of love with him or whether I’m emotionally shut down from everything that happened.
How do I know whether the marriage itself is over, or whether what happened with his family has made me unable to connect with him?

Hi,

Context: I currently work in one of the IT firms in Bengaluru, have 10 years of experience, been at the current company for 4-5 years, started looking for new job and when I cleared all the rounds, just a day before accepting the offer, I got to know I am pregnant.

I feel anxious thinking that once I join the new company(2 months from now), I'd only have around 4-ish months before I'd have to take maternal leave.

Questions:

1. Should I inform my new employer/manager about the pregnancy right away? I feel nervous thinking that I might be cheating them by not telling. I'd rather have them kick me out now than later cause I have a job for now(I have not resigned yet)

2. Can they push me out after knowing about it, if I tell them after joining? (there is a 3 months probation period)

3. If I tell them now, can they revoke the offer? or form a wrong impression of me?

PS: This is level up for me and a great opportunity, I do not want to loose it but I also don't want to be in a state where people force me out after joining...

PS2: I am a bit of an overthinker, so I might be end up keep thinking about this everyday if I dont tell them now, but again, if I do tell them, it might cost me my new job...

EDIT:- for the men who wanna text me asking if i am available for dating? what kind of creatures are you??? when someone is speaking about their pain, u guys are finding it to make an opportunity out of it?!

I’m 24F and recently told my boyfriend I don’t think I want to continue because I feel he’s emotionally unavailable and immature. Whenever I cry or face something difficult, he doesn’t know how to support me unless I explain exactly what I need. Recently, my period was late and I was anxious. I asked him for reassurance, and later told him I wanted more words of affirmation. He replied, “If you want that, you just sit with that,” in a rude tone and cut the call. I called him back three times to explain myself, and he then got another call and hasn’t contacted me since. He says I don’t see his efforts, but I feel like I’m constantly teaching him how to emotionally support me.

What really made me think was that when I used to face problems, my first instinct was always to go to him. But when my period was late, my first instinct wasn’t to seek comfort from him. Today I finally got my period, and I’m unsure whether I should tell him. Part of me thinks he was worried too, but another part feels I don’t need to update him anymore. I’m not trying to get a reaction or use it as an excuse to talk. Am I expecting too much emotionally, or are we simply incompatible?

I’ve noticed something in a lot of my conversations with Indian men. They can be perfectly nice, respectful and interested, but I often feel like I’m the one leading the conversation.

I ask questions, tease, pick up on something they’ve said, give them an opening to flirt to keep the conversation going… and quite often I get an answer back, but nothing that moves the conversation forward.

Sometimes I get an unsolicited, random life update or no response to basic courteous questions like how are you.

And by game, I don’t mean cheesy pickup lines or being an alpha male. I mean curiosity, playfulness, reading the other person’s energy, asking something back and creating a little romantic banter.

I get that our culture lays a huge importance on academics and career and most guys arent taught how to be around women or ask pertinent questions because we dont have a dominant, dating culture that teaches people how to date - which could be attributed to why they behave they way they do.

Women, do you experience this too? And men, what does flirting or showing interest look like to you?

40f mature lady here, divorcee, single now.

Somehow the 50+ uncles in my society feel entitled to lecture me on morality and they say i should not have men friends, especially of the opposite religion.

This has happened to me twice in the last 3 months.

Each time i smile and shrug and say yes sir yes sir....

It's getting too much 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽

Please excuse: Used chatGPT since I’m bad at grammar.

I’m 26F, married for 2 years, and I’m currently back in India for around 18 days. i am born and brought up in Dubai, whereas my husband just came to Dubai 4 years back. I came a few days before my husband because I wanted to spend some time with my cousins. He’s arriving in 2 days, and once he comes, I’ll be staying with my in-laws for the remaining 14 days.

My in-laws are relatively young — FIL is 55M and MIL is 45F. My MIL is genuinely nice to me. My FIL is also generally nice and sweet when speaking to me, but I’ve recently started noticing some behaviour that makes me wonder if he has very traditional expectations of a daughter-in-law.

The day I landed, I went to their house with my family just to meet them. He kept asking me to stay with them instead of going home. I understand asking once as a gesture, but he repeatedly said things like, “Stay here” and “Your MIL will be happy if you stay.”
I told him that she would probably be even happier when my husband arrives and we can all spend time together, and then I left.

The thing that really bothered me happened with something as stupid as JUICE.
We were sitting in the veranda — me, my parents and my in-laws. My MIL was serving everyone juice. She gave me mine, so I started drinking it. My FIL hadn’t received his yet, and I noticed he was kind of side-eyeing me, almost as if waiting to see whether I would offer him mine.

I didn’t.

Then my MIL served him his juice, and he said something along the lines of, “Why did you bring it? She would have taken it, no?”

I was literally just sitting there peacefully drinking my juice 😭. I didn’t react. My MIL laughed it off.
After we finished, I took my glass to the kitchen. I didn’t take his because… why would I? He is a grown man and his glass was right there. But I could tell he noticed that too.

And this is what is making me anxious about staying there for 14 days.

It’s not just with me either. I’ve noticed that he does similar things with his kids.
For example, my SIL has two kids under 2 and is obviously struggling. Recently MIL was carrying one of the grandchildren and FIL kept saying, “Put her down, don’t carry her, don’t carry her.” I found myself thinking, why is he so concerned about whether she’s carrying the baby?

He also seems to notice who does what for whom and whether people offer things.

For example, immediately after our wedding, my husband, MIL and I were going out. I offered MIL the front seat, but she didn’t even wait to hear me and just got into the front seat herself. My FIL was standing on the veranda and I noticed him watching to see whether I would give up the front seat for her.
And honestly, I don’t mind doing these things.
If I genuinely want to offer my MIL the front seat, I will. If I’m going to the kitchen and someone happens to need something, I’ll help. I’m happy to be considerate.
What bothers me is the feeling that I’m being observed and evaluated to see whether I automatically do these things.

It makes me feel like I’m participating in some kind of sanskari bahu marathon.

He also seems to have this expectation that everyone will attend to him. He rarely gets up to get a glass of water or pick something up himself. It often feels like he sees himself as the king of the house and everyone else should anticipate what he needs.
Maybe I’m reading too much into it.

But I’m worried that as his daughter-in-law, I’m going to be expected to constantly anticipate his needs and behave in a very traditional “sanskari bahu” way.

And I really don’t want that.

I’m perfectly happy to be respectful, warm and helpful. I love my husband and I want a good relationship with his parents. But I don’t want to spend 14 days monitoring whether I took someone’s glass, offered something, stood up quickly enough, etc.

There was another thing too. When I called my FIL after getting into the car from the airport, he was actually very sweet and asked how I was. He also asked me to meet my BIL, who was studying nearby. I didn’t because my flight had already been delayed by 3 hours and I was absolutely exhausted. I had just landed and wanted to go home.

So now I’m wondering if I’m making this bigger than it is.

How would you deal with a FIL like this for 14 days?
Would you just be normally polite and ignore these little expectations, or would you make more of an effort to accommodate them?

I don’t want to be rude or disrespectful, but I also don’t want to suddenly become a hyper-attentive daughter-in-law whose job is to anticipate everyone’s needs.

Am I overthinking this?

I think in this age its nearly impossible to build any significant wealth, so people who don't have the safety net, what's your plan?

I (31F) have recently married into a different community. We're both Hindu, but are from different states and they speak an additional language that I don't fully know yet (we have other common languages). I also live in the state where it's spoken so I know I'll pick it up (I can say basic phrases). I work an exhausting job and deal with some health issues which is why I've barely made extra time to dedicate learning it. It's just not been a priority.

Now during the wedding or while interacting with part of the family, I had to sit during this awkward bit, more times than I'd like:

"Do you know *language*?"

"Not really, I'll learn it."

*says random phrase* "Do you know what I said?"

Like dude, I said I don't speak the language, how would I know what you said???? Now a lot of his extended family lives in major cities and I did not face this with them at all.

Now coming to the point, I'll have to be present and attend various events going forward. My husband's sibling is getting married, and his in-laws tend to LOVE the *language* (cough). His future MIL tends to look directly at me and only speaks that language, of course, on purpose (she speaks other languages perfectly fine). I'm exhausted thinking about future interactions when what we need to focus on, is the upcoming wedding.

While I express this exhaustion, I want to add I don't despise the language and I do make an effort to join conversations that I understand the context of.

Ladies in situations like mine, do you have any tips?

So I am a neat aspirant and I was a dropper I have got a rank where I can get colleges but the fees will be 80 lacs + my father is telling me he has enough money to sustain me in private medical college but let me tell you that money will come from selling lands , using all the savings and maybe borrowing money from the relatives .

I don't know I am still 19 and i am really depressed, I really don't know what to do for me this situation is getting worst , he is doing everything to make me join mbbs pvt .

The only reason he is doing this because my bua has completely manipulated my dad she calls in regularly to tell him that I should be forced into medicine because it is a good career I know it is a good career but let me tell you that I should be feeling happy when my father will be giving 80 lacs and still I may be fail or couldn't get a seat in neet PG, it's also difficult for me right now to comprehend this situation my bua has tried everything to do she calls my bade papa to tell him to tell my father that MBBS is the best and I will be regretting the idea of btech . He makes everyone to speak to me or my dad about the MBBS my brother who is also forcing me for the MBBS tell me that only MBBS can earn me good , himself has done PG and now SS and not doing any job after pg.

Okay, so my cousin is going to get engaged in like a month or so and we decided to go shopping recently. It was just cousins together no actual adults or parents okay( all of us are like 19-25) and my cousin’s fiancé works in the Army and he’s known to be a little misogynist but they love each other and there’s nothing we can do about it so we all just play along even if we don’t like him.like, we try to cover up and not show skin when he’s around and stuff like that. But this time I didn’t care honestly and I wore a cropped T-shirt which was very unlikely for him. Anyways, we were at this huge bridal store in our city and the whole theme in the store was Muslim wedding theme alright. I mean the clothes and stuff and display were all shararas and stuff that people wear during walima and all. And my mum is half pakistani and I grew up with that influence and I speak Urdu and watch Pakistani dramas and I do have that influence on me and cousins know. They even say I look Pakistani and we just joke around. I was looking around the store and I was mostly looking at the Muslim themed side and my cousin jokingly said that my Pakistani side is coming out( it’s not racist or anything guys it was just a long running joke in our family) my other cousins also agreed and laughed for a bit. And then, my cousin’s Fiancé says, “ do you know? (pointing at me and smiling) girls who look like you are the ones that Honeytrap the soldiers and do spy work get their secrets “ he said it once and I’m kinda autistic so I didn’t even understand and laughed. He repeated it the second time and said the same thing but instead replaced the “girls who look like you “ to Just “girls like you” my other cousins also responded and clapped back and said something rude to him but I was in my own world.

I brought this up to my cousin today after they had a small fight and she said she prolly must’ve just meant “ my looks “ but idk I dressed differently so it felt weird but nonetheless, it’s a weird thing to say isn’t it? Or am I overthinking it?

Tbh even my parents and aunts and uncles ans all the elders are done with his misogyny so we’re kinda like reconsidering this marriage rn.

Please give your 2 cents if you read the whole thing.

This might sound weird to a lot of people but I met this woman at my Gym , we somehow became friends , we workout every morning and we developed a bond , we consider each other as friends and she is quite chill and fun to hangout with.

We have been on drives , getting coffee after the Gym and then we started going to cafes and other hangout spots on weekends , she used to be an Air Hostess but now works a desk job in the same airline .

We recently were having coffee after the Gym and her sister with her 6 month old daughter came to pick her up from the shop and she even introduced me to her sister as her friend .

She says she isn't interested in marriage and having a child(which is ironic since she is obsessed with her niece) since she was engaged when she was 29 but her fiancé called it off because of her job .

Her birthday is coming up and she is celebrating that with friends and family and wants me to come there as well and she said that her family would love me , what does that mean ?

The coffee shop we go to has its parking at the other side of the road so somehow after parking the car while crossing the road we started holding hands and it became a thing .

Am I overthinking ? Is she getting attached ? Is this friends ? What should I gift her?

Sorry for intruding your all's space. I am Korean American woman in a tough situation with my husband and wanted to really use perspective on Indian family dynamics and culture. For context, my husband is of Mizo ethnicity. We met through church, both grew up religious and conservative, and are both practicing physicians (he is an ER surgeon, and I am a paediatric fellow). When we first met, I actually thought he was Filipino based on his looks.

Before we got married, he was hands down the most thoughtful and caring man I had ever known. Other guys I dated in the past never truly understood me. When I tried to have boundaries due to my religious upbringing, those guys got offended, acting as if I owed them physical affection just because we were dating. They usually tried being my friend just to score, constantly objectifying me or others as trophies to their guy friends. But with my husband, we built a genuine, solid friendship first before I ever caught feelings. He never objectified anyone and shared my exact religious values which I appreciated. Even when we were just friends, his level of care was unreal. He would keep pads in his backpack for me, always bring an umbrella for me on hikes, cooked and stayed with me when I was infected with COVID. He made me feel genuinely loved and cherished, and it only got better when we finally started dating.

But despite discussing having kids before marriage, he completely avoided physical intimacy with me after the wedding. When both of our parents constantly asked about grandchildren, he deflected with medical jargon which is a load of BS. Lately, he also dropped a massive bomb on me proposing that we move back to India so he can practice medicine in New Delhi, even though I very well know that moving would destroy my own medical career. I don't think I can practice there, and I am also a DO and not an MD like him. I was a bit perplexed because did he even take me into consideration?

We actually share finances so it was just this other day I found out, that he put in a huge sum to enter into a lottery for a house in India? I was vividly pissed and was questioning him about the expenses and he mentioned how its a "great" house it is and started showing me pictures. He did not even once consult me, and brought up how my parents raised me in korea moving moving here... and how we could "do the same". I am just so lost. Idk if that spent money was even for housing. like idk india but you seriously want me to believe that you pay a large sum for some "housing draws". I am just sorry... lost for words. even if its true i seriously fail to see what his obsession is with going back, when he spent most of his adult years since undergraduate here

At the same time, my parents are currently living with us, and he is extremely caring toward them. He would cook for them, take things out, go out with my dad to the park and all. I appreciate it, do not get me wrong but it feels like I am now competing for his affection because he does not do the same to me?. it sometimes feels like he shows more love and affection to my parents than he does to me as a wife. It also appears that he is married to the job instead because I asked people at work and they mentioned he takes on extra shifts of juniors while he himself is an attending. And then he tells me that his job is busy and that's why he does not have time for me.

So with all this I recently brought up the possibility of an annulment (which is a way for the church to declare the marriage void, instead of going through civil divorce proceeding) He then completely broke down, apologized, said he never meant to hurt me, and suddenly said he is willing to try intimacy now. After that, he did start opening up a bit more. He recently took me out for a romantic, quality dinner for the first time in forever, and we actually got physical. But I was so hesitant and emotionally detached through it all because I do not know if he is doing this out of genuine love or just out of panic to save the marriage. Idk if he would change all of a sudden again. I also feel extremely conflicted and unsafe taking that risk, especially when he refuses to see a marriage counselor and feels like he is hiding something.

The thing is in Korean culture, marriage issues like non consummation or seeking an annulment bring massive shame, and family is heavily involved in high-stakes decisions. Culturally, Korean parents often step in when a marriage is falling apart, but I am terrified of how his family will react if I bring them into this. Should I even do it? Is it acceptable in India. Unlike me he is an indian citizen and grew up there. He was initially studying theology for his undergraduate before going into medicine, so I could figure that his side of the family are very conservative.

I am quite close with my sister-in-law, and my in-laws have always been very friendly and sweet to me. Because of all these things, I am now considering involving his parents to help mediate, tell him to open up or at least this could make a potential annulment smoother down the line. Is it culturally acceptable in India? to talk openly with your in-laws about severe marital problems like lack of intimacy, mental distress, and considering an annulment (divorce)?

Will involving his family help him take this seriously, or will it backfire and make them defensive? Will it make me look bad and sour the relationship even if we work something out?

Ladies 😭😭😭😭
I got my first bikini wax today and GIRLS… how do you survive this?? 😭 I genuinely cannot describe the pain right now. I’m walking like a penguin and I can barely walk properly 💀
Please tell me what you guys do after waxing to manage the pain and discomfort. And more importantly, what precautions/care should I take next time? I definitely should’ve asked before going, but here we are 😭
Any serious advice from people who wax regularly would be VERY appreciated because right now I’m questioning every decision that led me here. 😭

I’m looking to hear from women here about their experiences with eve teasing and street harassment. Unfortunately, it’s a reality many face in daily life—whether on public transport, walking in neighborhoods, or at workplaces/colleges.
I’d really appreciate your insights on a few things:

1. Immediate Response: How do you handle it in the moment—call it out, confront them, or ignore it for safety?
2. Safety Hacks: What practical tools, habits, or safety measures have actually worked for you?
3. Handling Escalation: How do you decide when to involve bystanders/authorities versus de-escalating to stay safe?

Same

Tldr: a girl got scared and ran away from me, while I didn't even do anything

I'm a guy, 19, I am kinda like a "big" guy, I am slightly overweight and tall, I have a slightly big ungroomed beard and my hair is long and messy, haven't had a haircut in months, I was coming back home from gym, the area I was passing by didn't have much light (street lights) it was dark, so as I was walking and took a left, there was a girl walking a few feet from me as well, I was on my phone but I knew someone was walking mere saamne as well, suddenly she looked back at me, and we had an awkward eye contact, then again after a few seconds she looked back and then I knew that she might be scared and all so I slowed down my pace of walking and was pretending to be busy on my phone, she got aside and waited for me to pass and after I passed her, she ran so fast backwards that I could hear her shoes tapping the ground even though I had earbuds in

(Re uploading cuz last one didn't get much replies) Also wanted to say thanks that people in the comments were saying it wasn't because of my looks and appearance 😭 since I can't reply to comments because of account age

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I 32F married my husband 33M almost 2 years ago. Since the day after our wedding, things just got extremely regular. Neither his family, nor he made me feel like a newlywed. No festivals were celebrated, no first year of marriage special things, nothing.

I understand my husband really doesn't care about these things, but I still feel bad. Whenever I see posts from other people, I feel really bad and resentful towards my husband.

What can I do to not feel so terribly?