u/batcaverose9

Yes you read that right. I don't matter according to Islam and I can never view it as a peaceful religion and the people who say that it is are probably either not reading the Qur'an or they have read it through a blind lense.

I don't feel like my family views me completely as a human being, but a doll instead. Whenever I warn them about something, they laugh it off. Whenever my brothers do something that piss me off, they immediately get defended. I'm done. I'm so done. I'm feeling extremely suicidal because of this religion and god.

I don't know if I should sleep at night with all this stress about the current state of world. I don't who to reach out to about this since one of my friends are busy and I don't want to pressure them so this is the only place I can openly rant about stuff like this. Like I'm sorry, but I've been patient with my family enough. They are really starting to get into my nerves and I so can't wait to move out of that shitty country of mine and maybe even go on nc with some of my family members at least, but noo I can't because apparently it's haram to abandon your family. You literally have to "obey" them like cult leaders.

I just want everything to get better and live a normal life. That's all I ask for.

Hello again. I've made a post on this sub before about the abaya and I've decided to make another post to see if any of y'all have better tips to leave your family and a Muslim country.

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So, for a little info I (17 f), live with a very strict Shi'ite family in Bahrain. They even support the Iranian government and H£zb0llah and tend to fear longer me a lot with islam.

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Like what I said before on my previous post, my mom got slightly upset with me for refusing to wear the Abaya to visit my grandmother and that made me extremely worried since she's now going to become a bit stricter with me.

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Muharram is going start soon and I have to withdraw myself from any form of entertainment whether it would be music, films, etc. and I won't stop feeling panicked and hopeless.

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The only good news is that I'm spending half of my summer on studying to improve my grades so that I can go to a very good university. I am also starting to pray so that my parents don't get any suspicious with my behavior and such.

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So I'm now wondering if any of you guys have any advice (especially from ex Shias) as to how to make my family even less suspicious besides not being a full time Abaya wearer and have any tips on how to leave. I don't want to stay in this country any longer.

Hiya. I don't really post much here on Reddit, but I decided to make a post on the this sub and the ex Muslim women sub because it is overwhelming me sm and I don't really have anyone to talk to about this. I mean I do have some friends I can look up to, but most of them are busy and some are also going through stressful times and I don't want to add more on their plate. (Side note: please don't mind the grammar errors, I'm typing this in the bathroom feeling extremely stressed and about to panic + English is not my first language.)

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Alright so my mom asked me if I wanted to to visit my grandma and I said yes. She told me to get my Abaya and wear it. I told her that I don't want to wear it and she got shocked. I don't really wear abayas except for the days I go to the mosque and matams in Muharram.I told her why I didn't want to wear it, but reassured her that I'll be as modest as I can with my clothing.

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She isn't convinced by my points and told me that it's better if I wear it because it is "more practical" and I don't need to entirely change my clothes and just put on and take it off whenever I want to without any worries. She then asked me why I don't like to wear the Abaya and I said it's because it's "not my style" I didn't tell her the exact reason cause I know exactly how she would react. I hate the Abaya because it makes me think that there is something wrong with my body which is not true at all. It disgusts me right at the fucking core and is one of the main reasons why I had a huge insecurity with my body plus I feel very objectified with it and it makes me feel like my body does not really belong to me.

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The worst part is that my eldest brother heard our entire conversation and I'm afraid that he would tell my dad about it which is very bad because he is very very strict about covering up since he has forced me to completely wear the hijab at the ripe age of ten. Or maybe he would not be the one to tell on my dad, but my mom instead. I really hope this doesn't happen because if it does, you would not want to imagine what happens next.

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I feel so guilty about this because I made my mom really upset and I don't want our relationship to get ruined over this stupid piece of clothing that does not "prevent men from lusting" but instead makes it even worse. I really hope that nothing bad happens and she just forgets about all this. I serouisly don't want it to negativity impact my life forever.