u/bl00dflowerz

i feel like they are pretty synonymous with each other, or at least they are for me. i have an ocd diagnosis and anxious attachment and i feel like they are constantly feeding off of each other. if i get an idea in my head bc of my anxious attachment, i ruminate and have compulsions and it’s becoming so debilitating. does anyone have any tips for managing this? i am in therapy.

i’m in a new relationship and things have been going really really well. i’m very happy and she makes me feel very loved and cared for.

but my rocd has started to kick in and i’m struggling with some things. she hasn’t given me any real reason to doubt or be suspicious, but certain things have been causing me to spiral. we’re in a wlw relationship, i am lesbian but she’s bi and had broke things off with a man right before we started dating. i can’t help but feel the feel the need to compare and i feel like that comes down to insecurity and how misogyny has affected me throughout my life.

we were together over the weekend and she posted a pic of me on her story. she mentioned to me that this guy had liked the story and was rolling her eyes about it. i made a comment like “you know what i’d do? block!” in a joking way but because i really would. she kinda laughed it off dismissively.

i have caught myself checking a lot again, like looking at her phone when she’s on it next to me, but she doesn’t seem to be hiding anything for me to feel like i can’t trust her. i’ve also been checking mentally if she still likes me, like how she responds to texts, etc. and it’s starting the spiral a bit.

i really like her and i really don’t want to self sabotage this. i’ve mentioned i have ocd to her but not rocd specifically. she knows about my health ocd and and contamination ocd. i’m wondering if i should share this with her? i REALLY do not want to get in the cycle of seeking reassurance. i know it’s not healthy for either of us, but i’m wondering if i should share with her that i do have these struggles and am working through them? i signed up with nocd and am scheduled for a call tomorrow to try and get ahead of it.

what the title says. i (lesbian) am about 2 months into a relationship with my lovely girlfriend (bisexual). things are going so so well and i am so happy. we hit it off instantly and developed an emotional bond pretty quickly, but very healthily. we have already had sex a few times and it has been great. i am very sexually attracted to her and do not feel like my demisexuality has had any affect on our sex life itself.

she is very open about her sexuality and is much more experienced than i am. sorry if this is tmi for this sub, but i do not pleasure myself or watch p*rn at ALL. i have a sex drive now solely because of her and with her, but do not act on it unless i am with her. however, she has shared with me that she self-pleasures multiple times a week. i can only assume that she watches p*rn while doing this as well, and the thought makes me feel kind of anxious and insecure. idk if this is a demisexual thing, but watching p*rn almost feels like cheating to me because i would never do it. i cannot view anyone else sexually other than her.

i can recognize that the way i view sex is not the same way as most people do, and that there is nothing wrong with that. i also feel like it’s not necessarily fair to project my views onto her actions, especially without her even knowing how i feel. i want to bring it up to her to hear her thoughts on it and to share my feelings on it as well. i really value our relationship and want things to stay healthy and open between us. i’m just really worried and anxious about bringing it up. i don’t think she would want to do anything knowing it would make me feel upset, but i’m worried bringing it up may hurt our relationship in some way.

just wondering if anyone has any input on the matter :) TIA <3