u/born2procrastinatee

I don't even know how to explain this properly, but lately I've been craving genuine conversations. Not necessarily friendship, not necessarily anything specific I just want to have someone to talk to.

For the past few days, I've genuinely been trying. I've joined random Instagram GCs, tried initiating conversations, messaged people first, and even made another account so I could interact with people anonymously. But somehow, I just can't seem to get anywhere.

The frustrating part is that I actually want to talk. I love books, politics, random ideas, opinions, life basically anything that can turn into an interesting conversation. I don't want every conversation to be deep or intellectual, but I do want something beyond the usual "hey, wyd?" and then nothing.

But I don't know how to keep a conversation going.

I can start one. I've tried. But somewhere along the way, I run out of things to say or start overthinking everything. I'm scared of saying the wrong thing, coming across as awkward, or just being boring.

And then I watch other people.

I've spent the last two or three days in an Instagram GC watching people talk. Someone completely new joins, says "hi," and within minutes they're laughing and talking like they've known each other forever. They make it look ridiculously easy.

Meanwhile, I've been sitting there for days wondering how I'm supposed to enter the conversation.

I genuinely admire people who can do that. At the same time, I can't help being jealous of how naturally it seems to come to them. I keep thinking, how do you guys do this?

Sometimes at night, I put my phone down and stare at the ceiling wondering if there's something wrong with me. I used to think maybe it was my appearance or my awkwardness around people, but a lot of these people don't even know what I look like or who I am. So I don't even know what I'm supposed to fix.

I know this isn't some huge life problem. People have much bigger things going on. But sometimes I get this sudden urge to talk, to have a completely normal conversation, and then I realise there's genuinely no one I can talk to at that moment.

I'm not writing this to get sympathy or to make anyone feel bad for me. I think I just needed to put this somewhere because I don't really have anyone to say it to.

For people who used to struggle with this: how did you learn to actually talk to people and keep conversations going? Did it ever become natural for you?

I don't even know how to explain this properly, but lately I've been craving genuine conversations. Not necessarily friendship, not necessarily anything specific I just want to have someone to talk to.

For the past few days, I've genuinely been trying. I've joined random Instagram GCs, tried initiating conversations, messaged people first, and even made another account so I could interact with people anonymously. But somehow, I just can't seem to get anywhere.

The frustrating part is that I actually want to talk. I love books, politics, random ideas, opinions, life basically anything that can turn into an interesting conversation. I don't want every conversation to be deep or intellectual, but I do want something beyond the usual "hey, wyd?" and then nothing.

But I don't know how to keep a conversation going.

I can start one. I've tried. But somewhere along the way, I run out of things to say or start overthinking everything. I'm scared of saying the wrong thing, coming across as awkward, or just being boring.

And then I watch other people.

I've spent the last two or three days in an Instagram GC watching people talk. Someone completely new joins, says "hi," and within minutes they're laughing and talking like they've known each other forever. They make it look ridiculously easy.

Meanwhile, I've been sitting there for days wondering how I'm supposed to enter the conversation.

I genuinely admire people who can do that. At the same time, I can't help being jealous of how naturally it seems to come to them. I keep thinking, how do you guys do this?

Sometimes at night, I put my phone down and stare at the ceiling wondering if there's something wrong with me. I used to think maybe it was my appearance or my awkwardness around people, but a lot of these people don't even know what I look like or who I am. So I don't even know what I'm supposed to fix.

I know this isn't some huge life problem. People have much bigger things going on. But sometimes I get this sudden urge to talk, to have a completely normal conversation, and then I realise there's genuinely no one I can talk to at that moment.

I'm not writing this to get sympathy or to make anyone feel bad for me. I think I just needed to put this somewhere because I don't really have anyone to say it to.

For people who used to struggle with this: how did you learn to actually talk to people and keep conversations going? Did it ever become natural for you?