u/captainshockazoid

we were at the laundromat, there were these two 18-20 something boys with a nice car, waiting for their laundry outside. i was getting my jacket out of the car and i heard from their open car window:

guy pissed off on the phone: no you're not listening to me- no look- i cant help you if you cant help yourself- i cant HELP YOU if you wont even HELP YOURSELF you gotta- no- if youre not even going to- what i'm SAYING IS- (frustrated forceful garble of words all at once) you know what i'm done! (hangs up.)

guy 2, hypeman: ...thats what im talking about bro! dont chase these hoes, make the hoes chase YOU. dont CHASE. the hoes. make. the HOES. chase *YOU*. (laughs.)

i cant really convey it well over text, but his line delivery was just so odd that its stuck in my head. guy 2 was the one who politely offered to help us carry our laundry earlier i think lol. i hope guy 1 figures out love.

i hope this doesnt come off as too aggressive but it is genuinely starting to upset me. i am 27, i live with my mother, we go to the laundromat once a week, i live in TX with no A/C. i have a plastic uncovered hamper, i'm unemployed.

when my mother comes home she says the whole house stinks of pits, and that my room smells like a teen boys locker room. okay, i dont want to walk around reeking, so for a long while i've been trying different things to clean my clothes. nothing is working. most of my shirts are barely one or two years old.

especially in the last week or two ive been trying to scour Everything in my room because as summer is coming on shes saying its getting worse.

stuff i did these past two weeks: i bought medicated antiperspirant and hibiclens and regular bar soap. i wash once a day, *everywhere*, i wash my hair every two days. bought lysol laundry sanitizer and soaked literally all the active shirts, underwear, socks, shorts, and non-jean pants i have in rotation for five hours before we went to the laundromat. i stripped both the plastic mattress protector and cloth cover off my bed and soaked those too. then i boxed up all my winter clothes/clothes i dont use and most of my blankets and sheets (ive been sleeping on 5-6 heavy blankets most of my life) and put them in the garage to sort or toss later. i kept two blankets and a sheet, but i did not have the strength to wring them out so i just washed them with laundry sanitizer at the laundromat normally. but also i wrung out all my clothes and my mattress protectors as much as a i could, took them along, and washed them all with another thing of laundry sanitizer in three 4-load capacity washers with hot water.

then everything was dried on high, and when i got home i hung up all my shirts and pants in the closet slightly separated. i put my shorts in the dresser, then put my hamper in the closet.

in my room, i sprayed carpet cleaner on the carpet, vacuumed, sprayed with pet odor lysol stuff. i lightly sprayed my bare mattress with water + light bleach, but not to the point of soaking it. i wiped down Everything with clorox wipes, my windowsill, the walls, my dresser. i took my box fan apart and wiped all the dust out. i dont have any open food or dirty dishes or food trash in my room. my shoe rack is on the door. i washed my bathroom down with pinesol and bleach. i still have a lot of plastic and paper and noncloth things sitting out, but my mother says its not the wood or the shoes or the other hard items, its in my clothes.

i burn incense a lot, i have a candlewax melter, and a little room spray dispenser thing. i sprinkle pet deodorizer on my carpet and vacuum it up a couple times a month.

i guess also: i have a big old dog who sleeps on a blanket in my room sometimes. shes greasy, we wash her blankets every week too. earlier tjis year she cut herself on a pot outside and then came inside and bled on my carpet while i wrapped her leg. theres still bloodstains. and, on the foam of my mattress, there are major bloodstains from me, even with two covers. i cant afford to replace my mattress or my carpet just yet. my computer chair is cloth and has sweatstains as well that ive been trying to scrub/bleach out. i have a minifridge with some old food in it, but my mom said its not that.

in the past, i have tried soaking and washing my clothes in vinegar, awesome, and athletic dawn laundry wash i think its called? i've tried copying my mothers laundry habits... she is more active than i am, does not sweat much, she leaves her laundry to be done a week longer than i do, but her room doesnt smell like much of anything besides vaguely lavender. i sweat and sleep a lot, im less active, i change my loungeclothes (usually a shirt and boxers) every day.

a day after washing Everything with the sanitizer, my mother says the house smells like pits still. i know people can be noseblind to their own smells but i had JUST washed and sorted through everything i own. i've had this issue my whole life apparently, a few years ago i had to throw out and replace all my everyday shirts. my sheets and blankets are newish as well, since i get a new blanket every single year for christmas.

i dont know what to do dude, it just gets so bad after a few months each time that my mom starts telling me to toss out everything i own. its really starting to bog me down. i dont have anyone else nearby, so i cant exactly ask a friend or family if i stink that badly. and of course nobody said anything the last time i had a job, but they might have been too polite. i cant afford to replace all my clothes and blankets right now, or buy some kind of specific cloth to wear. i cant afford to go to a doctor. it makes me want to not be around people, or stand too close to them. i usher my mother out of my room immediately after she tries to enter it to talk to me, i dont even feel clean enough to sit on her bed and watch tv with her anymore, and i want to apologize when we're in the car (which also doesnt have A/C.)

i dont think shes being malicious. my mother and my aunts have sensitive noses for one thing, even when they arent pregnant. my mom picks up on when another person is ill or infected long before everyone else can smell it. and shes blunt but not usually cruel or a liar so i dont think shes saying it to hurt me. but mom reacts as if our house smells like a locker room thats never been cleaned, every time she comes home from work. there are parts of our house i think dont smell great- the garbage disposal, the spot near the door where the dog sleeps, the trash can when it needs to be rinsed out, the fridge when the food goes bad, so im not totally noseblind to bad smells. but she says no its ME, my shirts are tainted. i've been sniffing the shirts im wearing and not wearing off and on, they smell like medicine to me.

what am i doing wrong? am i missing a step in the cleaning/hygiene process? im going to start putting my hamper in the garage and maybe leaving dirty clothes in trash bags until its time to go to the laundromat, i think. i really dont want to have to shave myself all over because its such a long process, and it grows back within the week. i am also trying to spend less time in my room, on my bed and chair, but i am afraid of leaving my smell on the couches. my window is always open, its been open since summer last year, i dont have curtains. short of dousing myself and everything i own into bleach stained oblivion, or living as a nudist in a metal box, im not sure what to do.

i don't really understand, why did christa pike get the death penalty?

how is living in Ahwatukee, AZ?

catmoder/chihuahuamoder doodles

at the laundromat at midnight

i'm losing my mind. what do i do. [cant get rid of teenage boy smell]

poontyr: the god of Nature(totally not Pan)'s piss poor attempt at making a female satyr + a sad dryadhon gyal