u/catbamhel

Anytime I've cooked lentils, it's taken hours of boiling or simmering. So many food blogs on the intertubes tell you it should only be 45 minutes of cooking which I think is just wacky. It always takes me hours. I found a website that said soaking them overnight cuts the cooking time from 2 hrs to 45 minutes.

I found a big bag of split peas/green lentils really cheap at the store. I soaked them overnight in water. I changed the water once and rinsed off them off a lot more this morning.

I've been boiling them for two hours so far with some pork sausage grease, onions, peppercorn, bay leaves, a little salt. No I'm not using anything acidic. They're just starting to get a little softer AFTER TWO HOURS and an overnight soak!!!!

I'm convinced now that lentils are strictly a crockpot food. I don't f#+_+#(#) get how people cook lentils in under anything less than a couple hours!!!!

I've spent my whole day screwing around in the kitchen, getting nowhere, overheated and dehydrated with a pot of green bull$h*t and I'm just so frustrated and I just wish I had a mom to tell me what to do instead of Google and YouTube. I have my grandmother's cookbooks tho. They've got some wonderfully vintage misogynist phrasing. But they've got good info.

This is half a rant but half asking for some real world advice cuz I got a 15 lb. bag of green lentils to make it thru and apparently everything I read on the internet about it is garbage.

EDIT: I've read how not adding salt is a myth and it's fine to cook it with salt. I've lived in California and Atlantic Canada. It's all the same story. Also, there are lentils in here that are only half cooked and lentils in here that are so cooked they are dissolving. I hate my life.

EDIT 2: The bag was on sale. The cheapest at the store. Probably cuz it was really old. I just read a serious eats article that talked about how old beans are terrible to cook with cuz some of them turn to mush and some seem barely cooked and that soaking can help with that but it's still a shit show. (It also mentioned that post a popular belief, cooking with salt when cooking beans is a good idea.)

Pic in comments.

My husband and I left Sonoma, the city, a year ago. We live in the Northeast now.

There were some great things about sonoma. A couple restaurants, an amazing taco truck, some cool people I met. But in general, it was a terrible town and even though I've lived in places that were very poor, run down, and affected by both systemic oppression and gentrification, Sonoma was by far the worst place I've ever lived.

I could go into it. Everything is way overpriced, way more expensive than San Francisco. There's a lot of Boomer drama. The summer weather is uniformly absolutely terrible. The apartment complex we lived in was in shambles and it seemed there was constant illegal and dangerous stuff going on. Extremely incompetent police. Very little outreach for young people. Schools shutting down. It was by far the most dangerous and most expensive place I've ever lived.

Now we live in the Northeast. It's kind of humid here right now, but that only lasts about a month up here and everything is still green and beautiful. It's way easier to get healthcare. We can afford to live. The Atlantic Ocean is gorgeous. We have more space. The weather is way better. There isn't one time of year when it's not 10 out of 10 beautiful.

I'm originally from California, and I missed the redwoods and my friends and family. I miss the food. But life here is of such better quality that I can't imagine I'd ever go back.

If you're tired of Sonoma's socioeconomic shit show and the day drunk boomers and watching white people claim they're not racist while treating the Latinos in town like they're invisible and the violent crime outside of the "nice" neighborhoods and the passive crim inside the "nice" neighborhoods, I recommend moving. We're so much happier. SO. MUCH. HAPPIER.

I just wanted to offer hope to anybody they're wondering if life is better somewhere else, if the grass is indeed greener. And it is! It's not like we don't run into problems here but it's so much better. I'm so grateful. It's okay to leave! Do it!

This isn't to dis the people of sonoma. There were a lot of wonderful people I befriended. But oh my God am I so much happier to be gone from there. I love where I live. We thought about it long and hard and we chose right.

My cat's poop issues fall into two categories: he does retaliatory poops. If his favorite blanket is not on his chair just right etc. And he has been diagnosed with IBD so I know that may be a bit painful for him.

Retaliatory poops are in key places where we stand a lot like in front of the sink or right in front of the door or on the floor next to where I like to sit and read. We have puppy pads around the litter box which he's often used. He likely has some arthritis. When he's pooped outside the litter box, he's used those puppy pads and it's been fine. But the last 2 months things have gotten really carried away. Yes we've been to the vet multiple times about this, yes we are meticulously cleaning boxes. Yes we have multiple boxes in two different locations in the house.

I've tried everything. Puppy pads, litter boxes that have very low lips, I've changed his food a million times, tried novel diets, things without chicken, rabbit, the whole deal. I've tried pumpkin puree, licorice root for kitties, recently were giving him some kitty fiber supplement which really does help with his poop texture.

We're trying steroids again right now. It's been four days. He didn't respond great the last time we tried steroids but we're trying to mild or dose of a different steroid prednisotholithone or something like that. (Not prednisone.)

Currently, we've had to shut him in the bathroom with a low lip litter box, food water, and his favorite bed. He hates being shut off from the rest of the house. He loves being around people and the other two cats. But his pooping has gotten so unpredictable and all over the house that we just can't deal with it anymore. There's a room off to the side of the house that is kind of like a living room but has a door on it and we can't let him in there because he thinks the entire thing is a giant litter box. He likes to go to the rugs... and poop on all the rugs in that room specifically.

He yowls in the bathroom sometimes, very loudly and I'm sure being deaf doesn't help. I know he really hates being in there.

He still loves being picked up and cuddled, he loves touching noses with people, he loves being pet, unlike other cats you could pet him for hours, he's very affectionate, he still purrs, he still loves cat treats.

He's got stage 1-2 (on the border) kidney failure from what I was told on his last blood test a few months ago. In case that's important. He has lost a ton of weight but has recently gained some back cuz we tried appetite stimulant (miritaz?) for a while.

Taking care of him has worn on me a lot. Especially recently. It's been angering, depressing, exhausting. I think about putting him down and I can't bring myself to do it cuz he's obviously still enjoying things like affection and treats and he doesn't look like he's in pain on the regular.

Admittedly, and you may judge me for this, I'm just exhausted and I'm tired of taking care of him. I'm tired of finding poop all over my house. I'm tired of trying every single thing I possibly can, blowing a bunch of money on him, for him to just take a dump in front of the sink simply because his blanket isn't right on his favorite chair or I didn't open the curtains enough for the sun to come in for him to sit in. I'm tired of feeling guilty for shutting him in the bathroom and hearing him yowl wanting to come out. Losing him would be so sad but I would have such relief at the same time. I feel really guilty for entertaining euthanizing him just because I'm exhausted. It doesn't sit with me right. But I also think his quality of life is kind of stupid with being shut in the bathroom most of the day and who knows how much pain he is in with his IBD. His mood has been a little more depressed but I think that's because I've been shutting him in the bathroom.

I was hoping for some kind of advice or maybe a new idea. I hate that I'm shutting my cat in the bathroom, I hate that I want to put him down just because I'm exhausted.

My husband has very poor communication. He also has little bodily awareness. This means when we're doing something like moving a large heavy object or fixing something together (we're both very diy types), I can get hurt.

We're getting condensation with the warmer summer so the deep freeze is having more condensation on the bottom it appears (although I think it may be busted cuz that should not happen.) Last night, he was trying to put the deep freeze on some wood blocks as to put a tray under it. Long story short, it had the deep freeze at an awkward angle and it looked unsafe for all kinds of reasons.

I said as much and asked him if he wanted help. What happened next was him giving very unclear instructions, word salads, multiple unfinished sentences strung into one giant disaster. I told him multiple times I didn't understand him. He clarified things I thought but when we went to actually do a coordinated movement, his motions and body were all over the place moving this big deep freeze putting me in physical danger. I've recently gotten hurt in two different situations because he was doing dramatic physical motions, was out of control, and giving me verbal chaos.

So this time I yelled at him. It was totally warranted as my physical safety was at risk. I absolutely wouldn't budge about wanting better instructions and body awareness from him and told him he's not going to put me in harm's fucking way.

He was really mad. I didn't care. I fixed the deep freeze situation myself. He begged me to let him help and communicate with him while he sat there uselessly and yelled at me about potentially hurting myself. I flipped him off and told him me moving the deep freeze by myself was safer than trying to work with him.

You can comment that it's wrong to yell and flip him off, but guess who didn't get hurt this time? Me.

Later that night, he said he was angry at me cuz I was rude. I said sorry I flipped you off, but the rest of that was warranted because it was the first time in a long time we've done something like that where I didn't get hurt because he 1. communicates so poorly and 2. has no awareness and/or regard for my bodily safety. I then told him that now that I found something that works, it's going to be very hard for me to go back to trying to kindly suggest things and ask for better communication. But that if he could change the way he communicated and be more aware/considerate of simply my body in space, it would change the dynamic.

He went on to get his usual angry face and threatening tone and I said loudly, "You have no right to be angry and you're gonna knock that shit off. I'm requesting something reasonable and there's no reason to pull that shit." I had to say this several times. He hated it, but he did knock that shit off.

He tried to gaslight indirectly me by asking me to point out times where he did communicate better. As if all those times made up for the multiple and recent times I've gotten hurt. I said absolutely not. I said that's like asking me to be grateful about the steak on my plate when there's horse shit next to it. I said it's totally reasonable to demand the common sense prerequisites for my physical safety and trying to redirect the conversation away from the issue is totally fucked up.

He kept dancing around him doing anything to change his behavior and I said "I've had to change my behavior to suit you plenty and you can't even listen to a reasonable solution?"

He accused me of telling him to change as a person and I said, "you don't think I've had to change because of your issues? You're asking me to go back to phrasing things nicely when my physical safety is on the line but you can continue to hurt me?"

I told him I'm basically in the position of begging him to have an actual conversation with me about what he can do to not put me in harm's way and that that's ridiculous. He got sarcastic and said it's not a problem that can be solved on a white board. I said why not? He said it takes him a long time to change. I told him I don't have a long time to get my fingers smashed again.

Yes, I am aware it may be weaponized incompetence.

I realized in a split second, we'll probably divorce at some point. He's really great in many ways, helped me so much, and I do love him, but it's not worth this. I felt free. I wanted to caretake him cuz he was obviously unhappy, but I stopped myself.

We were up till two am because I would not budge about "being rude" and told him he needs to figure out why he refuses to address his problem when my physical safety is on the line.

But anyway, I feel free. I feel really really free cuz I refused to abandon myself and uncompromisingly demanded something reasonable. Even tho he didn't give me a reasonable conversation, I'm the one who benefited cuz I put myself first.

Edit: I'm playing a YouTube clip defining weaponized incompetence. Really loud. So that he can hear it. While he is sleeping in the spare bedroom. Across the hallway. FUCK IT.

I've got a question. Here in Canada, the buy Canadian movement is strong... People are buying Canadian products, and other products from other countries, but trying to avoid American products.

However, we're still buying from American stores. Walmart, PetSmart, places like that. I will say that Costco's CEO is actually a really good person and tries to be very fair to his employees so I feel he is an exception to American business people And I don't mind supporting Costco, but I don't understand why we Canadians are still shopping at American stores but looking for Canadian products. Honestly I shop at Costco a lot less nowadays because it's becoming more and more expensive.

I'm actually originally from California and I have a real distaste for my country of birth. I want to buy Canadian and I want to buy from Canadian stores. And for the most part I do. But I have friends who were born here and are part of the buy Canada movement, shopping at Walmart? I just don't get it.

We've got a lot of Canadian stores we could shop at. I'm thinking of Canadian Tire, Giant Tiger. I'm in Nova Scotia so there are some local grocery stores that we all love. Why are we shopping at American stores?

EDIT: no shade on anyone who doesn't have the bandwidth to boycott the US 24/7. We're all trying our best with the resources and mental bandwidth we got. ❤️🇨🇦

This gets a little bit TMI but hey, it's Reddit.

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Like a lot of men, my husband often orgasms way too soon. A couple weeks ago, we had sex for maybe 30 seconds. He only got halfway in. Last night, we tried going really slowly but once I actually started to enjoy it, bam. It was over. He's not thrilled when it happens, he feels a little bad about it, but doesn't really do anything about it. We've talked about it. There's strategies, but he doesn't use them.

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This past weekend we tried to have sex but he kept accidentally hurting me. He scratched me a couple times - he did not draw blood it's just his fingernails were too long and he was not careful at all. And ladies.... He handled one of my breasts a little too hard and it really hurt. You know what I'm talking about. That shit hurts. I couldn't get my libido back after that. He felt bad about it and I apologized for just not being able to get turned back on. He wasn't a jerk about it.

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I understand sometimes orgasming too quick just happens. Sometimes guys just cum really quickly. Sex isn't a perfect thing, there's lot of clutzing around sometimes. It's not a perfect scene from the movie Original Sin (the unedited version. Which is fantastic.). But it's been and on and off problem with him and then that's just the end of sex.... Like my pleasure is optional...

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At some point in our relationship, he started to use his hands afterwards on me, but it wasn't common. I appreciated it when he'd think of it, but he often didn't. Which again communicates that sex is about him and my experience doesn't matter.

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I have brought this up several times over the years - that I'm still a human being and he could do other stuff with his hands if he's cumming too soon. Which is further humiliating because I feel like I'm begging him to see me as valid. He says, "why don't you just ask in the moment?" And I say, "Do you have to ask me to participate in your pleasure or is it just guaranteed?"

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Basically, I have to ASK for something while he's just ENTITLED to it. What message does that send me? I'm inconsequential and my experience isn't important while his is.

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After light on and off arguing about it over the years and then pointing out we've been light arguing about it, and him finally getting the point, I'm disinterested in it because I know it's coming from a place of "well now I have to do this thing for my wife cuz she won the years long debate." Not a turn on.

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I don't want to have sex anymore. Sometimes it's been great, but it's been an overall drag.

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I see Reddit posts by men complaining about how their wives or girlfriends don't want to be intimate with them anymore. We all fucking know the handful of reasons why. He's selfish in bed. Or he's emotionally stunted. He has an anger issue and his partner doesn't feel safe. He's disregarded her relationship needs for a really long time but feels like sex should just be a given no matter what. She works, cleans, cooks, takes care of the kids, handles social connections and events in the extended family and he plays video games after getting off work early. He demands she do all the emotional labor while he does little to none. Shit like that.

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We tell them over YEARS what we need to be in place before intimacy but they just give blank stares. We give them the answers to get what they want, they don't do it, then they get mad they don't have what they want.

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I just don't want to have sex anymore. I don't want to have to negotiate or have the same conversation over and over again. I've had a number of physical problems the last four or five years and sex feels like work cuz of it, but its totally work I'm willing to do cuz I like sex and it's important to me, but I'm not willing to have sex with someone that doesn't value my experience.

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He's great in a lot of other ways. He's really sweet and patient. He's taken care of me when I've been physically debilitated from health stuff. He's really wonderful to my friends and family. I like his family and he likes mine. He is caring and very loving. He's really funny, intelligent, values the right things. He loves me. I find him incredibly attractive. But sex just sucks and I don't wanna do it anymore. He just texted me about how great it was last night and I'm thinking, "wait, were we at the same party? cuz I could have had a great night without it." I wanna text back, "I'm glad you had a great time." I probably won't cuz that's shitty but I've also been done pretending it's fine for a real long time.

Edit: I'm one of few women who actually get off on penetration. This seems important info as I'm seeing some comments.

Edit 2: Yes. Boundaries. I realized that. Here's my thing: there are boundaries that are so common sense, so clear, that if you have to enforce them, you're not in a healthy adult relationship based on mutual consideration and cooperation. SO if I have to enforce that kind of boundary?? That says enough about the relationship to me that sex is completely off the table.

I have wicked hunger 1-2 wks before my massive civil war like period. Nothing solves it. Meat, especially beef, does for a little but then it's back to contemplating eating my whole family.

On top of that, working out is just not doable. I can't make it up the stairs or bring groceries in without panting like I'm running from the cops.

What pisses me off is I used to be super athletic. I've never been thin, I've always had some chonk, but I've been super physically capable. Used to run five miles on the weekend, did martial arts seriously for a while, used to hang glide, swam.

I gained a bunch of weight with a previous health problem and I feel it in my hips and knees. Both my parents died early of preventable heart problems and were both diabetic. So it matters to me. Sure I have all that insecurity that the patriarchy likes us to have, but the need to loose fat for me is very much a life quality and health thing. I'll never be thin plus I'm 6'1" and at my best I was fucking ripped. I could kick a bank vault open. I wasn't the cute girl, but I was a Viking queen damnit and I miss being her.

But now I can't make it up my driveway and I'm eating a lot thanks to this hanger. I was feeling shame about how I couldn't control my eating until it hit me that maybe this was all the iron deficiency. The exercise intolerance definitely, but the eating thing? I'm thinking there's a connection.

Wondering if anyone relates.

Every week, my sister and my husband go over to a friend's house where her (Emily) and one of her sons (Ned, he's 20 something) and us play board games. These are old friends of my sisters but new friends of my husband's and mine as we just moved eight months ago to be closer to her.

The friend's husband is an alcoholic. I'll call him Andrew. It's been somewhat problematic here and there. He'll wander into the living room and be annoying and drunk and most of the time, wander out.

Last night, he was royally plastered. Screwing up grammar and sentence structure, loud looking for a fight drunk. He was fuuuuuuuucked up.

Here are the list of weirdly aggressive things he did. The first handful is pretty petty but things escalated.

My friend, his wife, was pretty upset so she went to go smoke a cigarette on the balcony. They have a no smoking in the house rule. My sister and I followed her out, my husband wasn't there yet. Her husband, Andrew, despite it being very cold after a while opened the back door all the way, trouble is I was in the way of the door and he kept pushing the door against me until I moved. I thought this was weird.

Andrew at some point bought a big PA speaker and plays videos off YouTube really loud while we're trying to play board games. He's only done this twice this being the second time and it was so loud it was hurting my ears so I put my fingers over my ears and asked him if he could lower the volume. He looked direct me at me while increasing the volume. That was weird.

He put down a plate of fettuccine in front of me and when I tried to share it with my sister he ordered me not to and said that my sister was just fine. I said well she's my little sister and she was hungry too and why not? And he said she's just fine I didn't give you that to share it.

But here's where things get really crazy. Conversation started getting political. My sister and I said some things that resonated with him. We are very liberal. Andrew said to my sister I could just come over there and kiss you. He said it pretty forcefully and I was weirded out by it. For reference, my sister and I were sitting next to each other at the table. Before I knew it, he gotten up and put his arms around both of us behind us and gave my sister a big sloppy kiss on the cheek And then he tried to give me a big sloppy kiss on the cheek and I wasn't having it.

My husband was sitting right across from me and was completely stunned and shocked. He grew up with a very angry father and got super deer in a headlights about it. He also knows I'm 6'1", studied of variety of martial arts for 10 years on and off, and am a force of nature if shit goes awry. I could do much worse damage than he ever could. And he knows it. But he was also just in shock and totally weirded out.

So Andrew's trying to kiss me on the cheek and his baseball cap falls off and I put it in his face and said nope. Then he gets really angry and tries for the other side while I'm telling him to cut it out and trying to push back but he got pretty forceful. He ended up kissing me on the cheek and it was disgusting.

I could have resisted harder, I could have made a big mess, hell I could have decked the guy. But I really didn't want to put his wife, Emily my friend, through that crap. I just felt so bad for her. Her son Ned had refused to come out of his room that day because he knew what was going on with his dad I think. He wasn't there.

So after the fact, I said I didn't like that I didn't want it. He said that I was violent several times to my husband and I and I said "Hey I'm a friendly person but I like my space." He kept saying to everybody that I was violent and my husband finally was able to shake himself out of his shock and say hey she likes her space. He was pretty firm.

He then started smoking a cigarette at the table which is a big no-no in their household. Emily was totally embarrassed and upset. He turned up the music really loud. He started banging cabinet doors shut really loud. Banging plates. Emily said we just had to continue next week.

At home, my husband was ticked off with Andrew and I think he was a little disappointed in himself that he didn't make more of an effort to intervene or say something or whatnot. I told him that I was a much more fiery person than him, that if he tried to get physical he would have gotten hurt because Andrew's much bigger than him, and that I'm mad at myself that I didn't make more of an effort to resist.

Emily had made the comment earlier in the evening that her husband Andrew doesn't let her have any friends. She was making it to him, I don't think my sister and I were meant to overhear. So he's definitely tried to alienate her from her friends.

I've noticed that since there's been so much open dialogue about domestic abuse, men like this find other ways of being controlling, manipulative, and abusive. Maybe he is abusing Emily physically. I don't know. He definitely is other ways.

I genuinely hope something bad happens to him and he's no longer a problem in Emily's life or her family's life. She's perfectly aware of what a problem he is and she knows there's nothing you can do about an alcoholic except let them hit their bottom and wake up themselves, if they even get to that point.

Anyway, my husband told me he doesn't want me going over there and if I do, he wants to be with me. He's pretty angry. I'm pretty grossed out and upset with myself for not making more of a stink.

I don't want to lose out on a friendship with Emily because her husband is a raging alcoholic. I'm thinking that me and her just hang out in other ways. Maybe we do board games over at my sister's house who lives a couple blocks over from Emily. I told her before I left last night that she better call me if she wants any help and that I will intervene however she would want me to. This isn't a friend I've had for a super long time, but what you know when you come across a good soul and she's a good soul.

Advice and input totally welcome.

I'm a professional musician. I've played a s sung in many different genres, jazz classical, funk, other stuff. I sing and play piano at a high level. Not saying this to brag, saying to establish some context.

I cannot stand Elvis Presley's singing. I can't stand it. But I'm pursuing a second masters degree (which in itself has been a dumpster fire as the admin is very disorganized) and Elvis came up several times in a class.

I don't wanna piss off people who love Elvis, I know great people who are obsessed with him (which the obsession is weird). I hate shutting up in social contexts about how much I dislike Elvis Presley's singing and just his entire schtick. But I know if I open my mouth and say "actually I think he kinda sucks and was entirely overrated." He sung a lot of songs from other people, like Ma Rainey, and just butchered them. Hound Dog is the often referred to example. Rainey's recording of it is fantastic. Elvis' rendition is godawful garbage.

While I'm at it: I also dislike Miles Davis. He was a douche bag as a person and played like one. Yes I realize he is important in music history and had some interesting influence on musicians I do love but his playing,🤢🤮

Chick Corea's playing is nonsensical. I hear it and don't care. Kieth Jarret's stuff is whatever EXCEPT for his arrangement of Oh Danny Boy. That's actually good. I've never seen the appeal of Michael Jackson's voice. The production behind him? Quincy Jones arranging and production on the first three albums? Fantastic. MJ's voice? Meh. (Also how is everyone sticking their heads in the sand about the fact he sa'd kids?!)

How about Hazel Scott?? Why aren't we listening to her like she's a household name? She's FANTASTIC and super historically important. There are SO MANY good musicians that just don't get as much attention. Carmen McCrae CHEF'S KISS. Ma Rainey as mentioned before. Roland Hannah has been knighted he's so good.

Anyway, in the many different musical circles I move in, speaking my mind means shitting all over these crappy musicians that have been put on pedestals. Gatekeepers and cult like following of certain musicians who just suck.

I've been shopping at Gateway which has been great. Husband is a carpenter and my employment is weird right now (long story.)

I went into Costco today up by Bayer's lake in the HRM. It's been a couple months since I have been and I wanted some specific things I couldn't get at Gateway.

I was floored with the prices. I couldn't even bring myself to buy a bag of frozen vegetables. The yogurt and green beans were in much smaller packages and more expensive... I got the very basic things I wanted like cooking oil, cat food, boring stuff like that. Cheese is cheaper there than Gateway (but that's the only thing that's cheaper at Costco than Gateway.) I did buy my favorite Gouda on top of our regular marble and cheddar.

I spent $330 at Costco on a 3rd of what I got at Gateway last week. I got three times as much easily and spent $200 at Gateway.

To boot, I opened the Gouda when I got home and had a little. I dunno what changed but it was AWFUL. Just TERRIBLE.

I know it's the Iran war, oil prices, post pandemic high prices that never went down, the fact that it already costs a bit of money to get food out here... And a lot of greed but... Wtf?!

You know it's bad when you buy the basics at Costco and end up paying $330. I remember when you'd go, you'd spend some money alright, but you got a pretty good bargain and you'd come home with a lot of great food. Of course, that was also on the west coast in California (which has become a shit show and is completely unaffordable not to mention the ass hat president.) I've been here less than a year, moved to be close to family that's up here.

On top of it, my sister was with me and when she paid for her groceries, an employee ran up to her from out of nowhere, told her how much she's paid for groceries the last six months, and borderline harassed her into getting a higher paid membership. He wouldn't take no for an answer, it went on for the entire time she was checking out, and she had to yell at him to get him to leave her alone.

I've always been able to rely on coscto. Things have been feeling dark for a while. But I feel it's about to get so much worse and I'm really down about it.

I will say tho thank goodness for Gateway.

I'm super new here so if anyone has money saving tips for groceries, would love to know. Also maybe some words of hope .. I'm feeling very down.

I had grapefruit juice for the first time in years today. I poured half a cup in a glass and then soda water on top of that. I did this twice. I also had some decaf black tea. I was going to bed and suddenly felt like my bladder was extra full and really hurt!!! I went to pee, nothing came out...

I know carbonated water can do this. I know cranberry juice can do this. But grapefruit juice?! And this bad?!

Anyone ever have this? Is this normal? It feels like my bladder has gas pains!