I think I'm incapable of making normal friends
We talk on the phone or text but its always a lot of venting about their lives. Its quite repetitive, they'll talk about a problem, i listen, we work on it together and they figure out what to do next. This all happens in long phone calls and long texts.
Then it goes back to the same patterns, they didn't do what they said they'd do, or changed their mind, or whatever the reason is but they are back where they started and then vent to me about the same things again and again.
Everybody's lives are hard but I didn't sign up to be anyone's therapist and it seems like thats all I am to them. I don't have a huge circle of friends, just 2 close ones I've known for most my life.
I know nobody is 100% happy go lucky every day but thats not even what I expect.
Once in a while they'll ask me something about myself, and I answer them but it feels like they're not really listening or even paying attention. I had already told them about that event or thing but they talk like its the first time they heard about it. Thats when I realized they were probably not listening. I try to avoid talking about my struggles because its not a fucking competition of whose life sucks more.
This happened so many times, and I give them the benefit of the doubt every single time.
I used to think maybe they're going through something so lets not judge too harshly and be patient. Months and years of this, with a couple of friends that are "closest" to me.
And they're both the same. I distanced myself the past couple months to try not to be available all the time and even if I keep my communication to once every couple weeks, they still vent the same when we talk again. About the same shit again and again and again.
