u/curioussoul786

Brief intro (optional): Salam everybody! This isn’t the first or last you’ve seen me on this forum but I am determined 😂

Your Essential Information:

Age: 28

Origin/Ethnicity: Indian mom, Pakistani dad, I was born and raised in the U.S.

Languages spoken (with proficiency levels): English, can understand Urdu but can’t speak it well.

Level of religious practice: Moderate. I wear hijab and eat zabihah only but lack when it comes to praying.

Hijabi (F) (Yes/No): Yes

Current residence (city, country): Houston, USA

Willing to relocate (if yes, please specify or 'anywhere'): Yes, within the U.S. or Canada as long as you’re willing to travel to US a few times a year so I can see family

Siblings (number and older/younger): 2 younger and 1 older

Previously married/Kids: nope

Occupation: Teacher

Education: Bachelors of Science in Education

Height (cm), weight (kg): 5’6, I am a chubby woman.

Physical appearance (specifics you think are important): I wear glasses. I am told I look different with and without makeup so I’m glad to show both versions. Also I have tattoos.

Smokes/Vapes/Hookah (Yes/No): No. would prefer the same from my partner.

Leisure activities: Reading, watching movies, painting, solo tripping.

Your Preferences in a Partner:

Age range: 28-34

Origin/Ethnicity: Open to all ethnicities. I’d prefer somebody also south Asian but I’m open to learning a new culture too.

Languages: English. Fluent in Urdu or Arabic (so our kids can learn it)

Level of religious practice: Moderate. I want somebody who respects wiladats and also shahadats. Somebody who harbors a strong love for the Ahylul Bayt and wants to pass that down to our kids.

Education: At least a Bachelors.

Deal breakers:
I would not be a good match for you if
You to live with parents after marriage
You are looking for a housewife
You want a lot of kids
You are sexist, homophobic, use slurs in your day to day.

Other preferences (appearance, family situation, etc.): Would love to have somebody at least 5’8 and above.
I would prefer somebody who’s established in their job and career. And is financially independent.

Additional Information you like to add:
I have not had good examples of marriages in my life so I can be a bit cynical. However I think deep down I do wish to find my person who I can be 100% myself around. I want somebody who knows his flaws and doesn’t excuse them but also gently guides me towards what’s right. Honestly I’d love to be a mom and so I’d want somebody who can be a great dad (not trying to scare you! Kids will come in due time lol). I want my children to be better Muslims than me and hold that endearment for the Ahylul Bayt and I need a good man to do so. And in turn I will try to be a good woman alongside you.

Salam! Just thought I’d ask this question. What’s your take on the phrase of right person wrong timing and have you encountered it yourself? I feel that I’ve met some stellar people but because of their current chapter in life we didn’t move forward. Obviously it’s not something I pushed but I’ve noticed that one person in particular I felt that exact way. And although I’ve pushed forward I do sometimes think hmm what if. But also if it’s in my naseeb, it will find its way to me eventually right?

Salam everybody! I’m 27F and getting ready to inshallah move out by myself next month. I’ll be in the same city as my family and I’m not moving for a better work opportunity or for higher education. I’m simply moving because I’ve always been somebody who’s very particular and enjoys my space and privacy. Growing up in a big desi family of 6 I just feel it’s time that I move out. I’ve already signed a lease and my family does know.

I’m not here to ask if it’s halal because I know it is. I’m not moving because of sour relationships or anything negative. However, my parents are happy with my decision. My mom is supportive but emphasizes how much she’ll miss me and my dad is pretty traditional so he’s very upset. My siblings are also down. I’m the first in my family to do this. We’re also not telling people because “log kya kahenge” and it’ll ruin my chances of marriage (INSANE).

Has anybody done something similar and then gone on to find a good partner and have a better relationship with family? I don’t know anybody personally who’s done the same so looking for some sisters who can understand me. I’m so excited but I also feel very guilty. Ultimately I think it’ll be good but still nerves are high.

Salam yall. I’m 28F here to just rant for a sec. Or speak to people who maybe get it. As I get older, I find myself letting go of the idea that I’d be just fine without marriage. Now, I do accept that that may be in my naseeb but I do wish that I’d meet the right person so I live a life with them. In the meanwhile, I’m happily living my life and continuing to grow as a person but this search feels like a lost cause. Despite being in a diverse city, the Shia population seems to be so tiny still. Beyond that, it’s hard to find somebody communicative and compatible enough. I often wish I’d let my parents go the arranged marriage route when I was younger 😂 I’m now seeing the effects of being considered “too old” to marry which is insane because 28 really isn’t old at all. Still, I’m ready to throw in the towel. I won’t because I’m too spiteful to give up but had to complain. May we all find partners who help us flourish and let us do the same for them.

Salam!

I was feeling incredibly low about marriage not happening for me so here I am again LOL. One of these times these posts are gonna get me my husband!

I’m 27F in Texas. Born and raised here and would really like somebody who’s the same. I’m a weird case in that I consider myself religious but culturally I’m more western. Indian and Pakistani parents. I am a homebody who’s trying to go out more. I realize I’m getting into that “old” category of single women so with that please know I will grill you with questions and don’t mind the same. I know exactly what I want and don’t want and would hate to waste anybody’s time. Lover of the Ahylul Bayt and need somebody whose love for them reflects in their character. I’m an independent person and not everybody’s cup of tea but maybe I’ll be yours!

I like solo traveling, reading, and doom scrolling on tiktok. I once told somebody I consider myself to be a tomboy and they said I was the most feminine person they know so take with that what you will. I would say I align closely to buttercup from the powerpuff girls.

Some important things!

- I have tattoos (no scary big dragons I promise)

- I don’t want to live with anybody’s in laws (a bit traumatized from witnessing this ruin lives firsthand)

- not down for misogyny, racism, or homophobia. Especially pertaining to the last one, I will never disagree on what is clearly haram but I am not down to view or treat others as less than human.