BM Drama
Hi,
My boyfriend (25M) has a 3-year-old son with his BM, and the situation has honestly been exhausting and confusing lately. For context, BM has been extremely unstable over the past year. She’s moved around 6 times in one year, doesn’t have a car, struggles to keep a job, and has had substance abuse issues. At one point, she alienated their son from his father because she didn’t like me being involved. Eventually BM moved in with my boyfriend’s mom, and ironically things actually started improving after BM started seeing my boyfriend’s mom’s true colors for herself. Since around September, things have mostly been civil and co-parenting was finally starting to feel manageable. Recently though, BM has started accusing us of mistreating their son because he says things in his sleep like “oh yeah” and “I don’t want to,” and because he wants to sleep in his own bed at night instead of with her. She says she’s losing sleep, her heart is breaking, and is now heavily insinuating that my boyfriend is somehow being inappropriate with his own son. I genuinely don’t understand how a toddler talking in his sleep or wanting to sleep in his own room automatically becomes an emergency or proof something bad is happening. It feels like things are spiraling into accusations with zero evidence, and it’s terrifying because these kinds of accusations can destroy someone’s life. Has anyone dealt with a co-parent who jumps to extreme conclusions like this? How do you handle it without making things worse?