u/daspidermenace

Okay, for context.
We got together last year & broke up and got back together (May 8th-May 21 BU happens)
I just now went through his second reddit account & saw him replying to Femboys about “Dm’s Open?” & “Obsessed 30M” and i’m upset about it.
We had a long conversation when we got back together about completely starting over & not mentioning anything about the past anymore but I found myself getting super insecure and sad. I know he’s also into guys i just feel so upset about it. I brought it up & after him getting defensive I told him to stop with being upset that he got caught and was cheating. I also said he was acting like his ex wife because he was. He also had a “friend” that sent him dick pics and when his “friend” asked for some back, he just said “oh yeah i’m not able to get it up rn so maybe later” instead of “I told you i’m in a relationship & if you can’t respect that then maybe we cannot be friends. (this was a couple he was trying to be apart of, theoretically. before we got back together) He initially lied to me saying they were just friends but i found out later that they were flirting.

When I brought this up to him- he got mad at me saying he thought we wouldn’t mention any of the past stuff (reddit comments) and how can he change if i keep bringing it up. I felt he was right about that but after i said “ok what about ur friend “he just said- I didn’t reply with dick pics, i just said later. that never came did it?” Like i was supposed to feel better for that??
He then went on about how he’s sorry i fell in love with him & that he’s just like this and since his ex wife beat him for 3 years he’s just stuck in routines that he can’t get out of. I felt he was comparing me to his ex wife and that i’ll never just be myself to him.

I forgave him & he forgave me for bringing up the past. I just feel like we are great together & we definitely work when we don’t have issues, but how do i trust a man that has cheated on me and lied to me before?
He hasn’t cheated or lied to me since getting back together recently and it’s been 6 weeks since he spoke with any guys (other then the “friend” who he just blocked/deleted)

I don’t want to leave him. I want us to work this out. I want to believe he’s changing and that he can be honest with me. He’s very traumatized from a lot of shit he went through and as am i. We are so happy together but we have these moments. I don’t know what to do or feel about it. We made up and are okay and talked it out but what can i do to make him not need attention from other people (men mainly).

My husband (30M) & I (27F) are looking for a place to move in Mesa/Tempe/Chandler area. Does anyone have good recommendations on where to look? We have 2 kids we get on a set schedule. No pets. Would like a two bedroom but our budget is $1,500 at MOST.

Please let me know if anyone knows a good place 🙏😭 Our credit scores aren’t great but no evictions & rent always paid on time!

It took me a year to find our current apt and we are looking to move within the next couple months. (100% before the year ends)

Thank you in advance! 🤍