u/dreaminghappily

Have you ever experienced overnight changes? How big can changes be?

My sp wanted to start a small business and I decided to help him, we’ve been making flower buckets but we don’t have clients yet haha. So he started to buy them himself and he didn’t say it but I noticed they were for the 3p, I really don’t know how to deal with that.
Before, when he asked me to hang out and I couldn’t make it, I would feel super guilty, now I’ve been working on my sc and I can deal with it better. But I feel like this is a new level.
Today he asked me to go to buy flowers, but we were going to be in a hurry cause he needed to go to another place, and I’m starting to hate doing things in a hurry cause I feel he doesn’t take proper care of me haha.
I thought I was prioritizing myself by not going but then I felt super guilty again cause I felt I lost the opportunity to gain more experience that can help the business, the bucket he bought was stunning, he’s getting better at choosing flowers and all that stuff. I feel I’m falling behind and I really want this business to work but knowing that his main inspiration is the 3p makes me feel strange.
I’ve been affirming that he’s just practicing in order to give ME even more beautiful buckets and reminding myself that he chose ME to do this, but I continue feeling confused.
I think I’m dealing with the feeling better, at least I’m not having a crisis as I used to, but I feel I’m missing something, please help.

I’ve always had problems with my self confidence. When I started studying the Course I realized this was because I wasn’t recognizing myself as a creation of God which has always been perfect and complete. But in my daily life I still struggle with things like my appearance and feel REALLY insecure from time to time. I’ve been trying to tell myself the things I already know and that everyone sees me through the eyes of God, but would it be wrong to try to convince myself that I’m good-looking or repeat similar “compliments”? Would this come from the ego?

I’ve been feeling kind of guilty about expecting things to happen in the world. Like why would I want a specific work or car if everything is an illusion? Why do I want to experience new things when nothing exists? I’ve been thinking if having these desires somehow disconnects me from what’s real

On a daily basis and a practical way, what’s the best way to deal with the need to be chosen and prioritized, and how to act when the illusion is showing you the opposite?