u/eerie_faerie

they were one of my fav authors and now it seems all their fics are gone 😭 since WHEN and WHY?

so i relapsed in skin picking after doing better for weeks. i don't even remember the last time i would've been doing so good for so long so this relapse is making me feel extra bad. it wasn't the worst possible relapse as i picked "only" on my nose and nowhere else. though there wasn't even really anything to pick i was just aggressively squeezing the pores on my nose getting the sebum out which again is making me feel even worse about this relapse because there wasn't even anything to pick. i mean to my understanding at least you shouldn't "empty" your pores if they aren't really clogged and sebum is just like normal?

anyways, now my nose feels sore and is red and the skin irritated and also slightly broken/peeling from a few spots. sigh... i'm actually so mad at myself right now. but i was wondering if there is anything i could do to help my skin heal faster? i was thinking i could apply aloe vera gel but i'm not sure if it'll help for other than sunburn? or if it can clog pores or something. so if anyone knows about aloe vera gel or has some other products to recommend (though i'm kinda broke as of rn...) or just some tips it would be greatly appreciated.

hi there. first time poster (but long time sufferer lol) here. i have a long history with skin picking starting from quite early in my childhood. i've had issues with many different forms of picking but over the past years my main issue has been picking at my face. it mostly occurs in the bathroom as the thing that usually triggers it is seeing myself close up in a mirror. it's really making me feel miserable and wrecking my self esteem.

sometimes (lately it's been very rare) if i manage to go longer without picking and my skin can heal a bit more properly it can actually start looking just fine. like my skin isn't probably even as bad as i think it is (when healed) it's just that when i enter that state of compulsively picking i will try to squeeze literally everything out of every single tiniest pore on my face... and then afterwards my skin obviously always looks like 100x worse it's full of red and irritated spots and i often cause the skin to break and bleed and then form ugly scabs that take forever to heal. sometimes if the damage is really bad i simply will feel so ashamed i struggle to even leave my home or go in any sort of social situations due to the feelings of shame and anxiety. so this issue has literally made me isolate myself.

i've tried stuff like covering the mirrors or turning off the bathroom light whenever i wash my face etc but most of the time it doesn't work. when i start picking i often actually realize pretty soon what i'm doing and i really _want to stop_ but it's just such a compulsion i simply can't like it feels like my fingers are glued to my face or something. many times i will tell myself inside my head to stop and try to remind myself how my skin always ends up looking worse after picking than it did before but in that state it just doesn't help.

BUT i was wondering/TLDR: if the reminder came from "outside" in a way (instead of just me trying to talk sense to myself inside my head) would it maybe then be more likely i could "snap out" of the compulsive state? like if i put some post it notes or something like that on the mirror with reasons not to pick etc so that i would always see them when i look in the mirror and have actual visible reminders to discourage picking. so if anyone has done something similar and it has helped could you please share what sort of reminders or phrases or such have been helpful?

or if you just have some ideas as to what sort of words or language (or then just something totally different and not written notes at all) could maybe help break the compulsive state!

thank you so much if you read this post and can give me advice it's really appreciated.

i might start taking Vyvanse soon and i'm curious about the weight loss.

FYI: i'm not super overweight/obese and since obese people usually lose weight easier/faster at first i'm mostly looking for experiences from people with similar starting situations (normal weight/slightly overweight/chubby).