r/Dermatillomania

I've been picking for 30 years, thousands of scabs with dirty fingernails or unwashed hands etc, and I've never once gotten an infection, and I was wondering if that was a real thing or how likely it is to happen.

I know I can’t be the only one, but I have been picking pretty bad at my legs again and even KP on my arms. I already hate showing my legs bc I struggle a lot with body dysmorphia, but I had gotten slightly better about tank tops even tho I still hate my arms. But now I feel like a freak, honestly I get so worried I look like a crackhead :/ no judgement towards anyone w addiction btw, I have struggled with it myself (although not stimulants). I’ve been so uncomfortable showing my arms and I really really need to stop picking so I’m not absolutely miserable this summer. I already have a hard enough time finding lightweight clothes that I feel comfy in for summer, but this is making it so much worse. It’s been in the 90s in my area this week and it’s killing me. I just wish I didn’t hate myself so much that I could go out in a tank top and shorts and not care. But unfortunately society is not kind to fat people and I just am not at that point where I can say fuck it yet

So i know that there's already been a lot of discussion around plugs that appear in healing wounds on here.

But i still wanted to share my experience and ask, if someone can relate to this.

i get these weird deep acne spots that i pick at and ofc the inflammation worsens after that.

But swear to god - there comes a point where theres a visible plug in these kind of spots, and the spot will sting, hurt and itch like crazy - until i remove the plug.

They will NOT heal or close until the fkin plug is out - and as soon as its out, it doesnt sting anymore, then inflammation is gone and heals up in a few days.

I've used hydrocolloids on spots like these and the spot will close - but i'll keep stinging when i touch it and the dark spot wont really fade cause now the plug is trapped under healed skin.

Anyone got the same problem? I think it might be cystic acne - either a keratin plug or hair follicle?

But these are like my worst enemy cause nothing helps besides getting the plug out which means i have to open them and sometimes reopen 'healed' skin where the plug was still inside.

So how tf am i supposed to not touch them when nothing apart from ripping the plug out will help?

Its not the same as wound healing plugs. Anyone can relate?

I live alone with 2 cats. I don’t frequently see people because I work remotely and I’m very insecure of my disfigured skin. When I had a healthy social life and lived with roommates, my dermatillomania was mild. I really took care of my appearance because I cared what others thought of me. I also had limited privacy to pick because I lived with roommates.

Since living alone, I’ve truly let myself go. I no longer care about my appearance because I rarely see people. I don’t seem to care about developing hyperpigmentation or scars on my face so I continue to pick excessively. It is very satisfying but I do feel guilty and shameful. I don’t seem to care enough to stop though. I really want clear skin again so I can feel confident to go out and socialize. I no longer want to hide. How can I find the motivation to quit picking?

i have been picking the skin on my fingers town to my knuckle (the one closest to the fingertip) since i was like 5 or something and it has gotten worse recently and today i am sitting here and watching tv and i was picking and my hands hurt so bad.

they are bloody and raw and terrible and painful and i have to shower but i just know it is going to hurt so bad. i have never met anyone in my life that does this and i feel so alone and i HAVE TO SHOWER and it is so so painful it is pulsing

Hey everyone i just didovered this subreddit recently when I realised I have a problem to say.

Basically since I was a toddler ive picked scabs and its not just an every now and again idle thing it has always been constant as soon as I get scab I have to pick it.

TW: I used to self harm severely when I was a teenager and was wondering if that may be a factor.

Basically what has happened is I went to a doctors yesterday for a swollen leg with no injuries and the doctor told me it was an infection due to picking my scabs. I never really seen it as a problem until now, so im just wondering where could I find help and advice would it be my psychiatrist (if its a psychological issue) or would it be a more a medical issue and go to the doctor?

I really didn't think it was a problem but this infection is painful in my leg.

Hey everyone. First time making a post on this sub. I’ve commented but I’m just now understanding how bad my skin picking actually is after reading some posts and realizing how similar our stories are.

Im in a really weird frame of mind right now with my skin and I don’t want to go out if I pick really badly. Nothing against anyone who has or knows someone with a drug problem, I can’t imagine what people go through, but sometimes I feel like I look like I pick my skin because of a drug addiction. I’m embarrassed for myself, I’m embarrassed for my fiancé. I get weird looks so I hide my face. I have a niece that asks me what happened to my face bc I have a bandaids on it and nephew that asks about my boo boos. My scabs and scars are embarrassing and I want to fix all of it.

I’ll start picking sometimes because of a tiny pimple, rough spot on my skin, or I’m tweezing hairs. Sometimes it’s a painful cyst that I can’t get to go away. I recently started taking medicine for my adhd again, so I’ve been noticing that it’s making me hyperfixate on my face more than usual. It’s almost always when I’m stressed and/or when my anxiety is bad. It’s ESPECIALLY when I eat poorly, which usually coincides with being stressed. Does anyone else find that dairy makes their skin worse?

I’ll wake up in the middle of the night and pick my face because I’m in a daze and I feel part of my face that hurts. My fiancé will have to wake me up and get me to stop. Sometimes I find myself at the mirror for an hour, only to stop because he sees me picking. Sometimes if he leaves the house I’ll tell myself I’m just tweezing my eyebrows and he comes home and I’m bleeding.

I’m currently trying to heal large wounds on my jawline, and chin. Usually they’re like 1/2 in diameter each and I don’t know how to clear them up. I use neosporin and put bandaids on at night so I don’t pick but it doesn’t do anything quick enough. The wounds turn into scabs and then I pick the scabs and it just doesn’t go away. It’s just a huge cycle at that point. I went to the dermatologist once for a cyst but I had picked at it so it was infected and the derm gave me a huge attitude and it scarred me (pun intended hehe) to the point that I’ve never been back to a derm.

I know makeup usually makes it look worse, but when I have events to go to and I don’t want people to see it, i usually put on foundation to make it look less red but then it just looks like makeup over a scab. I just want the scabs to go away so I can at least use makeup until it gets better.

I was doing so well for a while and then due to certain unforeseen circumstances I’m now in a short term but super stressful environment that I have to be in for a little bit and I just can’t get over this picking cycle.

TLDR;

Picking my face so badly I feel embarrassed to the point of not wanting to go out. I want to clear the scabs, get rid of the scars and fix my stress induced acne. Dermatologists scarred me and haven’t been back in years.

If anyone can please help with the following:
- ways to clear acne quickly, especially cysts that shouldn’t be popped bc they’re deep
- how to avoid picking / get out of picking hypnosis
- fully clear up scarring and face trauma

EDIT: Sorry if anyone saw my post or a similar one 4-5 times. It told me it wasn’t posting and now I’m embarrassed even more 😭

What do you all tell people if they ask about the spots on your face? I work with kids and at least once a week they comment on my “owies” or “boo boos”, I’m never sure how or if I should address it. Also, I’m a therapist so parent is typically in the room which makes things even more awkward! Any advice is welcome.

My dad has anxiety and recently diagnosed ADHD, which he is now medicated for. Over the last year or two, he has started skin picking to the point where he has scabs/open wounds all over his legs, arms, and the back of his head (he's bald). He often has trails of blood, both fresh and dried, running down his shins or forearms. Whenever we point it out to him, he denies it or dismisses it entirely.

We think it started from when he was working in the garage and would get little cuts and sores here and there, he'd then subconsciously start rubbing his arms/legs, feel the scabs and proceed to pick at them—never letting them heal. So eventually, the sores just kept popping up, and now he's covered with them.

So, out of obvious concern, my family and I have all asked where all these sores are coming from, to which he'd shrug and say he didn't know. We then very quickly realised it was because he was picking incessantly at his scabs, so we'd point it out, "Dad, you're picking", "You're making your arm bleed", etc, etc.

Sometimes, he'd just grumble like he was aware of it but didn't wanna address it, other times he himself would bring it up at say stuff all genuinely confused like, "I don't know where all these sores keep coming from", "I swear something must be biting me", to which I can't help but look at my mom and sister in shared disbelief. We literally point it out to him WHILE HE'S ACTIVELY DOING IT, and he'll STILL get defensive and double down in denial.

I'm not sure why he feels so called out or feels like we are chastising him when really we're just concerned for his health. He's pretty sensitive to feedback/criticism in general, shutting down whenever he feels even slightly frustrated, but it's not like we are shaming him for it. We just want him to acknowledge he has a problem, to stop denying it so vehemently, and to get help.

I have no idea what his thought process is, like three people in his immediate family have told him individually on multiple occasions that they have personally witnessed him pick at his skin and open these sores but he maintains this narrative that we're either liars or have absolutely no idea what we're talking about. I feel like part of him must know because I've spoken to him about getting a fidget ring to manage it, and he seemed pretty receptive to that, but a bigger part of him just wants to shut his eyes and block his ears to the problem.

Does anybody have any insights or advice?

I also apologise if any of this came off as ignorant or insensitive at all

I’m diagnosed with anxiety and ADHD and when I was originally talking to my therapist, I mentioned my skin licking as kind of an anxiety thing. However, now when I think about it, I realize it’s way more because of the ADHD part of my brain. I always pick for the dopamine and it really really sucks. I have 2 fidget rings I use to try to combat it. What do you do?

Hello,

I am doing a research study entitled “Marked by Pattern: Contextual and Site-Specific Patterns in Trichotillomania and Excoriation Disorder.” The purpose of the study is to examine Trichotillomania and Excoriation Disorder, particularly how contextual variables, such as the environment or activities, impact pulling and picking sites and whether co-occurring relationships exist between specific body sites, in adults using quantitative scales.

Participation would require about 4-8 minutes of your time to complete an online survey. To qualify to participate, you must be 18 years old or older, fluent in English, residing in the United States, and currently experience hair-pulling or skin-picking behaviors.
If you are interested in participating, please use this link and you will be presented the federally required Consent Form via Qualtrics with more info.
https://abilenechristian.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_3KrXClPkdyg4AWq

Sincerely,
Shelby Richardson
Abilene Christian University
sgr23c@acu.edu
Primary Investigator

I just feel sad. I struggle with trichotillomania and dermatillomania specifically on my face. I take acne medication and barely have any pimples, but I still pick and pull and make my face full of red spots for no good reason.

My boyfriend struggles with empathy , ugh. Antisocial personality disorder, narcissistic traits, and more… we both have bpd so i feel like we do somewhat understand each other. But this one really hurts.

He recently told me that my skin picking is a turn off for him and that it affects his sexual attraction towards me. After I pick my skin I obviously feel guilt and shame and want to kind of hide myself from the world, so I obviously don’t feel sexy in those moments. He mentioned that it’s a turn on for him when people are confident about their looks. Obviously a direct hit at me because I am the opposite after skin picking. And apparently this stuff makes him not interested in having sex with me.

He used to try and help remove me from the mirror and take my tweezers away. I’ve spoken to him about what I struggle with and why it’s hard to “just stop”. I’ve explained it but he struggles to empathize with the whole thing.

Lately he told me that he just lets me keep picking because it annoys him. Most recently he said that when he realized I was picking at my face, he just laughed to himself. And he came into the room where I was and flipped me off.

He sounds like an asshole, I know. I also specifically don’t shave to avoid the urge to pluck my hair, and he also made it a point once to tell me that he doesn’t want to eat me out because of my bush. I told him why I keep the bush (to avoid plucking hairs) but I don’t think it changed anything for him.

I wish I was kidding about all of this. I wish this wasn’t real. I love him but he can be cruel sometimes and lately I’ve been really in my head about my skin picking and hair pulling because now I know how it makes him feel. I think it’s honestly just made me start to pick even more. And I did end up shaving my bush. And now I can’t stop plucking the hairs. I just want to stop these behaviors. I feel so stuck because the small shameful part of me agrees with him regarding the skin picking. But I also completely disagree. I never change the way I look at someone or feel towards someone just because of some redness on their face. I would have the empathy.

I just need support. I know he’s an asshole sometimes but it’s not always that way. And I really want to stop picking. I just feel extra insecure now and I know he wouldn’t even care if I told him that I feel this way.

Lately I’ve asked him to just be honest with me, be truthful, be his authentic self. And his authentic self is sometimes really mean? And cruel? And he kind of feels like he has a right to say his honest cruel thoughts because I’m asking him to be honest. And he’ll just tell me that his honest self is an asshole. I just really don’t know how to feel about everything. I guess this became a rant. He does love me but sometimes his love doesn’t feel soft. I wish he had empathy

Hey everyone,
This is my first official post here in this group and on Reddit. I’m so Sorry if this is long. I’m making this post to share my story, hear everyone else's, and figure out all the best tips and tricks everyone does for managing skin-picking. I usually make these posts in a Facebook group I’m in, but it's kinda dead. I have been dealing with Excoriation Disorder since middle school, so roughly a decade now. For context, I’m a 21-year-old female who is diagnosed with ADHD, Anxiety, and Acute PTSD. No part of my body is safe from me; I pick all over, including my nails and cuticles. Recently, I’ve been focusing on my mental health and finding ways to manage my picking; I recently started therapy and am seeing a psychiatrist who is researching skin-picking. She and I have been trying to figure out the best treatment plan for the past 2-3 months. She has me taking 100mg Sertraline for anxiety, 10mg Adderall for ADHD (just started taking), and 1200mg NAC. I would like to state that I have accepted the fact that I have this disorder. I try not to use the word “suffer” when I talk about it. Plus, I have been trying to wear more tank tops now that it’s getting warm outside. But that still doesn’t help the shame that comes with it. All my life, my family and friends have never understood this, and I don’t have anyone around me whom I can relate to. My husband has been trying his best to support me with this, but it’s just so hard even to explain when I barely understand it myself.

There are a few management tips I have been trying to use, like using color-change LED lights in the bathroom, but there are days when it is so hard to find the willpower to change the colors and prevent the “trance”. I’m thinking about ordering a red-light therapy lamp for my bathroom so I can just turn it on instead of opening a phone app to change the color. I try to wear long sleeves/hoodies on the days when my urges are really bad, but my brain will still find a way around that. I also try to have my husband sit in the bathroom with me while I do my night routine. I try to wear Band-Aids as “armor” for my nails and cuticles. When I could afford it, I would get my nails done, which thankfully killed two birds with one stone because I couldn’t pick at my nails or cuticles, and I feel as though the damage done to my skin wasn’t as bad compared to when I picked with my natural nails. Thank you for reading if you made it this far, and please let me know your journey and any tricks that have helped you!!

Hey ya’ll. New here, but I’ve been picking at my pores for years. I used to pick for hours at a time, and it definitely used to be a huge insecurity and source of shame for me when I was younger, but much less so as I’ve grown.

From what I understand, the compulsion to pick usually comes from feeling anxious or distressed and the dopamine reward from the compulsion helps relieve it.

For me though, it’s always felt more “fun” than calming. I have ADHD and often feel restless and bored due to the lower baseline of dopamine. I don’t tend to pick when I’m anxious or distressed but I do feel that picking is something that sends me into a state of hyper focus and excitement. Like when you’re playing a video game and you just can’t stop. Just one more. And one more. Oh it’s so fun, just one more.

Maybe the dopamine does regulate me in a sense, but I’ve never related to picking to quell my anxiety. And I definitely do deal with a lot of anxiety. It usually just starts with me seeing or feeling a bump and then not being able to stop myself from having a field day! I’m wondering how many others relate.

i know this probably sounds strange, but does anyone else also pick inside their ear canal? i always struggled with picking at my scalp and around my nails but this one is new and its causing me so much pain and i even got swimmers ear because of it, but i cant stop :( can anyone relate? i feel like i’m the only one that does this and it makes me feel gross

I often find that when I’m picking I think of justifications for it that logically make no sense, but encourage me in the moment. Things like feeling that my scabs are “rocks” which must be removed, a pimple has a “root” which I must get out, or are I have to scratch off bumps to make things “smooth.” Things that logically I know make no sense.

I see other people in this community talk about similar feelings and similar fake justifications that feel so real in the moment. Why do we do this? Why do we believe ourselves even though it isn’t rational at all?

Also inspired by another user!

I want to track and have goals, my main way i can avoid it is by avoiding mirrors always, if i need the bathroom it will have to be in the dark LOL

Feel free to join and put your dates

day 1 ❌ - i picked today i moisturised a lot after i hope it's not too red by the morning, aloe vera gel sometimes helps me

day 2 ✅ - i was soo tempted to just go back in, again and pick today but held off, focusing on healing my damaged skin barrier !

After joining this group, (and speaking with my doctor), I admit that picking is a medical problem and not just a nasty habit that I should be able to stop with sheer willpower. So, I changed how I'm dealing with my medical condition.

Now, I have a thick hand lotion, a cuticle cutter, a pair of thin gloves, and several fidget toys in my car, purse, and every room of the house (EVERY room), including in a basket on a table next to my favorite chair. I also wear a discreet fidget toy on my wrist.

I set an hourly day-time alarm on my fitbit. When it goes off, I lotion my hands, even if they don't feel dry.

I also bit the bullet and got a manicure with an extra thick powder setting. I had to ask for this. The thickness blunted the tips of my nails, so they aren't sharp anymore. I can no longer open a soda can, but that's ok. I just use a knife edge or ask my partner. Now, I can't scratch my hands, face, or body, so it's worth it.

I'll have to pay for these nails every 3rd week for $45+tip, and that really sucks. But what sucks more is bleeding hands, scars on my body, and marks on my face. I consider the money to be a medical expense.

So far it's worked for me. It's only been 2 weeks, but I'm feeling hopeful and proud of myself, and importantly, not like I'm a shameful loser who can't kick a gross habit. I now acknowledge that it's going to be ongoing, long-term, "treatment." Facing that fact has helped me greatly.

Of course, I could try meds for OCD, but I have reasons for not wanting that.

Also, I'm not saying you all are shameful losers. That's just how I felt about myself for many years.

I'm thinking of getting acrylics, only for stopping the picking. I don't have much experience with acrylics, but I feel it'd be possible to get short ones with tips being a little thicker than normally. I just feel that could help prevent picking more, if the tip was more stubby in the way that it'd be even harder to wedge into irregularities. Any experiences on something like this?