u/ethereal_aerith

My husband is starting a men's bible study on Wednesdays beginning this week. It's 30 min away so he'll be effectively gone from 6:30pm-9:30pm every Wednesday. The kids start their school year this Thursday (youngest is starting TK so a big day for her) and I'm behind with preparation. I'm embarrassed to say I haven't even gotten school supplies yet.

I'm 31 weeks pregnant and sooo tired. I'm a full-time c-suite exec. I want so badly to be supportive of him because he doesn't really have any friends and I know he needs this, and yet I find myself asking, "This has to start this week, of all times??? 😭" My husband also has a standing therapy appt Thursday nights so he's out of commission then, too, and he absolutely needs therapy to maintain his mental health. I do all the grocery shopping and meal prep, so I'll basically have no time off from Wed morning through Thurs night because as soon as I get off work I'll have to pick up the kids from their separate schools, cook dinner, help with homework, get them ready for bed, get them ready for school in the morning, drive them to school, go to work, pick them up, etc...

I know this really isn't that big of a deal and I'm sure many moms have a similar workload (if not more!) every day, I just feel like I'm at my personal limit already so the thought of taking even more on in the last leg of my pregnancy when I have SPD pain is overwhelming. If I weren't pregnant it would be no problem, but we still have so much we need to do before the baby comes, we don't even have a crib yet.

And I have so much I need to do at work before my maternity leave. We're about to do another round of layoffs. I'm not being laid off, I'm the person deciding who will be laid off, but I'm dreading it. Everyone on my team does a great job, but we're financially unsustainable and have been bleeding cash for months. I work at a nonprofit and unfortunately many government funding sources have been drying up. If you've never had to make these kinds of decisions, it really weighs on you emotionally, especially when you care about your team the way I do. I'm sure hormones are part of it too but I'm just so stressed in this moment. And I'm exhausted. Anyway, thanks for listening to my rant.

I’m curious to learn if there are any emergent themes in how 5s approach hosting/having guests over.

I’m a 5w4 sp/sx who grew up with antisocial parents, so we essentially never have guests. As an adult, I’m the same way. I don’t dislike people or socializing per se, but having people come inside my home has always felt invasive and uncomfortable. I’m sure some of this has to do with my childhood, but I also see some potential overlap with the 5 tendency to be reclusive, be private and even secretive, hold a part of themselves back, hoard, and protect one’s time/energy/resources. I also am the kind of 5 who is not a minimalist, and I have collections of various things about my house that I feel strangely awkward about sharing, or displaying to others. I guess I’m not very open about my interests (books, cookbooks, board games, art, video games… I have a ton of each)?

Ironically, as a mom I would really love to be the kind of person who effortlessly makes friends and has people over all the time. But the requirements for that seem fundamentally incompatible with my nature, so. I can fake being warm and social when I have to and I don’t mind going to other people’s houses at all, but it’s unsustainable for me and I get exhausted after a few hours. It feels even harder to be that way when I’m in the little sanctuary I’ve created specifically to escape everyone else’s expectations and demands, and now I have to entertain someone...

How about you?