I don’t hear people talk about what medically assisted weight loss is like very often
[EDIT: I should add that my methods, progress, and current state should not be the goal for others]
I’ve been pole dancing for a couple months. I can do full pole pull ups, stuff like laybacks, star gazer, etc. not really sure what level I’m at.
I’m trying to get vortex because I’ve seen that listed as a beginner move but it feels like something is very wrong in my arm when I try. I video my form and all my limbs are in the generally correct positions. I haven’t done it aerial because I can’t imagine this not hurting. I carry all my strength in my upper body and yet this is hurting my elbow so bad. Feeling a little disheartened.
Any tips? Conditioning exercises that might help?
I’m really ashamed of this because I’d rather think the opinions of men don’t have that much sway over me. They do though and to the extent that I’m finding it hard to seek treatment.
I feel like I’m not supposed to talk about this because it makes me a bad feminist but all I can think about is maximizing my partner’s pleasure. I’ve gone to the hospital after having sex because I was bleeding so much and yet a part of me was glad that at least I wasn’t “loose”.
It’s such a disgusting feeling but I don’t know how to get past it. I just have such a hard time finding motivation. My heart sinks a little every time the dilator goes in easily but at the same time I’m relieved? It’s so confusing. Sometimes being a woman feels like being a permanent side character. I can’t even look at myself through a neutral lens.
I (20) had a hymenectomy a few months ago which finally made dilatation possible. I tried it for about a week and noticed a huge improvement. Went on and off and could handle Intimate Rose size 4 no problem. Even went to size 5 sometimes. Then I kind of forgot for a couple months.
Recently, I’ve been trying to stick to it. I’ve done paired muscle relaxation for my hypertonic pelvic floor for over a week. It’s been really helping. On my 3rd day of consistent dilation with a size 4, I noticed some spasming which had never happened before. On my 4th day, it’s completely uncontrollable. It still fits and doesn’t hurt until the intense contraction.
I’m nearly in tears. I don’t understand. I’m wondering if anyone else has gone through this and if it got better. I’m just feeling really down. The only thing I can think of is that it’s some kind of sexual response. I don’t experience dilation as sexual at all but the only other time this has happened was during PIV. I’m hoping against all odds that maybe it’s a sign my body is reading the penetration the way it’s supposed to and not as a foreign / wrong sensation anymore.
I feel a little stupid over here but my providers seem just as informed about my body as I am sometimes (so basically clueless).