u/forever_summer2193

apologies if this isn’t the right flair.

yesterday was my first 5sos concert and i had the best time!!

i managed to get all the merch i wanted (plus a couple extra things). thank you to everyone who replied to my post about merch sizing. i got the grey zip up and i don’t think i’ll ever take it off lmao.

our secret song was red desert. i’m happy calum got the song he voted for! i didn’t vote since i would’ve been happy no matter what song won (teenage dirtbag, end up here, try hard, red desert) but i feel like i lowkey wanted red desert to win. it’s one of my favourites from calm. luke also said it was his favourite 4th of july and he gave vancouver the nickname: van cou cou. plus, seeing ashton wearing a canucks jersey made me so happy!

the concert went by so fast. it was like i blinked and it was over. i have ocd and a lot of anxiety, so i tried to focus on being in the moment and not worry about anything else and i feel like i failed. i spent way too much time looking at my phone. if you only count what i took of 5sos, i took 128 photos and videos. however, i only took 9 videos which means i took 119 photos. lots of the photos were taken while filming so 91 photos were taken while i wasn’t filming. i also hit the capture (not sure what it’s called) button twice every time i took a photo (part of my ocd), so if i didn’t do that, i would’ve only taken around 59 photos all together and around 45 photos taken that weren’t while filming. i was only supposed to take photos during certain times but every time they were on the side where our section was, i wanted to take photos. i would get my phone out a bit before i was gonna start filming just so it was ready and i found myself looking at my phone trying to decide how far to zoom in or something. i noticed it during the solo songs. mainly ashton’s. i found that my eyes kept darting between the stage and my phone screen. it probably didn’t help that i sat the whole concert (we were in the front row in our section and no one else stood up except for the 2 girls beside me, so i felt a little self conscious about standing which i know is dumb). i also kept getting distracted by everyone around me. but i’m going to try to not let all of that affect how i feel about the concert and not let it stop me from wearing the merch i bought and listening to their music. it might just take some time.

sorry for all of that. i just needed to get it out. it still doesn’t feel real. even during the concert, it didn’t feel like i was actually seeing 5sos.

anyway, thanks to everyone who reads this and has read my other posts. this is one of the nicest subs on here!

my show is coming up and i’m looking at getting the grey zip up and a shirt or two but i’m unsure of what sizes to get. i searched this sub and everyone said something different.

for regular zip ups/hoodies i wear either a small or a medium. how big of a difference is there between the small and the medium? i’m 5’7 and thin, so i don’t want to feel like i’m drowning in it but i’m not sure if a small would be too tight and the sleeves too short.

for tour shirts, i usually get a medium since they are unisex and that’s about as oversized as i can get without feeling overstimulated.

thanks in advance!

i’m sorry if this isn’t the right flair and if this has been asked before. i tried searching but didn’t really get anything.

i’m going to my first ever 5sos concert this year and i’m trying to plan what songs i want to film.

i saw some comments on here about how they aren’t playing the full versions of all the songs and i’m just wondering which songs have been cut short, what parts were cut, and which songs are played in full?

thanks!

a couple months ago i bought two philosophy body washes from marshalls. i didn’t think they would have safety seals on them so i didn’t check them while i was in the store. i didn’t open them until recently and when i twisted the cap off of one of them, i noticed that the safety seal had been peeled off. it was still attached a bit on one side but that was it. the other body wash’s safety seal was slightly pushed back in one spot. just enough that you could smell it. my parents said that someone probably peeled them off to smell them and that it would be fine to use them but i feel weird about it.

are they safe to use or should i just accept the fact that i lost a few bucks and make sure i’m more careful in the future?

i’ve been using the nyx can’t stop won’t stop concealer in the shade pale for a couple years and i’m just finishing up my last one. since it’s been discontinued, does anyone know of any shades from other brands that are similar?

thanks!

i’m sorry if this isn’t the right sub for this and if it doesn’t make much sense. i’m kinda all over the place plus i’m still quite new to reddit so please bear with me.

last year i started questioning my sexuality. i came to the conclusion that i’m bisexual. i went back and forth with bi and straight because i wasn’t sure if i actually was bisexual or just wanted to be something other than straight. mainly because growing up i was never attracted to any women. only men. even when i started questioning my sexuality, it wasn’t because i had found myself attracted to a woman. i just started thinking one day “what if i’m bisexual?”. nothing triggered it. lots of people have said that even though they came out later in life, they remember having crushes on friends and people of the same gender growing up, but i don’t think i ever did.

one thing that’s bothering me is that i’ve seen a lot of people say they are skeptical of women who never felt any attraction to other women until they were adults. they also said that most bisexual women are women who were never once attracted to other women but once said a girl was pretty and decided that made them bisexual. i just can’t help but think that that’s what i did.

there’s someone i follow on social media and she was once in a relationship with a woman and i’m convinced that the only reason i started thinking that i’m bisexual is because i wanted to be like her. at least that’s what that little voice in the back of my mind is telling me.

i also saw a tumblr post about former gifted kids and it made an offhand comment about them being bisexual now and i think i was like “am i bisexual?” (that little voice in the back of my mind is trying to convince me that like i chose to be bisexual so i would fit that post).

i want nothing more than to date a woman but what if i’m not actually bisexual. what if i’m just saying that i am because i don’t want to date men. what if i’m just like those straight women that wish they were lesbians. what if i never end up being attracted to any women i meet/try to date. what if i just think i would date a woman because i want to be bisexual. not because i actually am bisexual.

after i started questioning my sexuality, i saw a comment someone left in a different subreddit and they said that when they realized they were bi, they had asked themselves if there was any reason why they wouldn’t date someone who is the same gender and they couldn’t think of a reason as to why they wouldn’t. and i remember thinking that that was sorta how i felt. there isn’t really any reason as to why i wouldn’t date a woman. but is that enough for me to be bisexual?

i still can’t get over that former gifted kid post. i keep thinking that my first thought when i read the post was “well i relate to the other stuff in this post, might as well relate to the bisexuality as well”. but i’m not sure if that’s actually true or if it’s just the little voice in the back of my mind telling me it is to make this all so much harder.

someone posted an article on substack describing their first time kissing a woman and what her lipstick felt like and i remember thinking “ew”. now was that because i’m not attracted to women or was it a sensory thing? did i find the act of kissing a woman gross or the lipstick gross? does finding the lipstick gross mean i’m not attracted to women?

at the time that i had read the article, i had already been thinking about dating a woman for a while and decided that i was bisexual. so, i had already been thinking about kissing women. i honestly think me thinking “ew” was because of the way they described how the other woman’s lipstick felt. i think they said it was sticky or something. i think it was a sensory issue for me. but that voice in the back of my mind is telling me otherwise. it’s telling me that it was two women kissing that i didn’t like. what if that is why i said “ew”? someone who is attracted to women wouldn’t say something like that.

i used to not like seeing two women kiss but two men was fine. now i’m fine seeing two women kiss. i know that a lot of straight women are like that. i know that people can change, but if you’re attracted to women then you are fine seeing two women kiss.

when i see two women who are dating, i want that to be me. but i can’t tell if that’s because i’m actually bi or because i want to be bi.

i will (embarrassingly) admit that i do have an imaginary girlfriend in my head. it used to be an imaginary boyfriend, but when i started questioning my sexuality, it changed to a girlfriend. but i don’t know if imagining myself having a girlfriend is proof i’m bisexual.

i can’t even describe what it is about women that i’m attracted to. does that sound like someone who is attracted to women? to be fair, i have no idea what it is about men that i’m attracted to. if i found someone attractive, i never knew why i found them attractive. i just did. i honestly have no idea how to describe what i find attractive about someone.

i should mention that i’ve never dated anyone. i’ve also never liked talking about dating or talking about people i had a crush on. i do want to date people but it’s always made me feel weird. i’m hoping to work past it.

i should also mention that i have anxiety, depression, and ocd. i imagine one of those things is making all of this much harder than it needs to be. and as of last year, i no longer have a therapist so i’m trying to find another one. i was also raised religious. although, i’m not even sure that this is an excuse since we stopped going to church when i was 6 because the church started changing their beliefs. i did attend different activities at the church by our house with friends. i was also raised to believe that being gay is a sin and sex before marriage is a sin and all that stuff, which i think definitely had an effect on me.

if you made it this far, thank you! i’m sorry this was so long. as i was writing it, i kept remembering different things that i had to include because i wanted to make sure you had the full picture. i know i didn’t really include a lot of stuff that would point to me being bisexual but i haven’t found myself attracted to anyone in real life. all i have is my imaginary girlfriend lol. i still live with my parents and i don’t have any friends and i’m not in school nor do i have a job. so i don’t really interact with people all that much.

i know that a bunch of strangers on the internet can’t tell me what my sexuality is, but i’m just hoping for some type of guidance. i don’t have anyone in my life i can talk to about this. especially not anyone in the lgbtq+ community. so i just ask that you please be honest with me (and nice). if you have any questions i’m happy to answer them.

thanks!

edit: this post is already long enough but i wanted to add a few things based off of one of the comments and some stuff i’ve read elsewhere on reddit. i definitely didn’t make a case for me liking women, so i want to do that now.

when i imagine myself dating a woman, i feel happy. happier than i’ve ever been. i feel at peace. i can’t imagine being attracted to women and not choosing to date a woman. how could you not want to wake up next to the most beautiful woman in the world everyday. feel her skin against yours. how soft it is. or listen to the sound of her laughter and then do everything you can to get her to laugh just one more time because you just can’t get enough.

hopefully that helps explain why i was questioning my sexuality in the first place.

i know it’s expensive but i keep thinking about it so i just want to try it once. i’m not sure how much the color actually shows up on lips but i saw a swatch of the shade rosewood and it seemed a little orange. so i’m just wondering if it would look orange on someone who is cool toned?

thanks!