u/givetakegivetake

I'm pre-bottom surgery & vers, but I've only ever topped other trans guys. I've been dating this wonderful cis guy for about a year now. I've been bottoming this whole time if we're not doing side stuff, but he's vers too & wants some time on his back. I don't blame him, but I'm so nervous. He's bottomed for other cis guys, quite a bit. He's never bottomed for strap before. I worry that if anything goes wrong my dysphoria's gonna go through the roof, that I'll be too nervous to top again. Yeah it might go all fine, but first-time sexual ventures rarely go flawlessly. I just want him to have a good time.

Hoping some guys here might be able to share their experiences.

I have a pstyle STP as my preferred device while hiking/camping etc. Packer STPs fold on themselves & imo defeats some of the purpose of a packer for me. The pstyle can't pack but because of that rigidity you can kinda scrape off any potential dribbles.

But I went to a music festival over the long weekend & used the pstyle at the urinals quite frequently (hydration!) & nobody ever said anything. I tried to be a little slick when it came to rinsing it off in the sink. Plan was to say it was a medical device (which I did at bag inspection without an issue) but if anybody saw, they didn't say anything.

Hi everybody, I posted first in r/minimalism, & was recommended to ask you all.

I've got a wire bedframe in a tiny apartment, & that space underneath is essential. I'm dead-set on a shikifuton, partly because there is a futon-maker I want to support, Rock Soft Futons in Oregon, US. Also, I have always slept best on thin firm mattresses, & now that my mattress is kicking the bucket, I want to switch.

I'm thinking breathable bunkie boards on my bedframe. Would that be enough to support the shikibuton? I have my best guess but people here know more than me. TIA!

I have loved every futon, shikibuton, & thin wool mattress I've ever slept on, & my Western mattress is nearing the end of its life. So I'm going to pick up a queen-sized shikibuton from Rock Soft Futon in Oregon, US. They will top up the cotton as it compresses over time for $40, for as long as RSF is still in business, so that's very attractive to me. Infrequently, my cat makes a mess on the bed, so rolling up the bed for longevity & cleanliness is also a big plus.

However, I cannot sacrifice the storage space under my bed frame (otherwise I'd be posting in r/floorsleeping lol). So I'm thinking of bunkie boards on my wire frame. Does this setup sound okay, would I need tatami on top of that?

My partner hasn't had the chance to sleep on any of these very-firm mattresses. He sleeps like the dead while sleeping on camping mats, but there is a concern that sleeping on a shikibuton long term will hurt him. Would a cot-sized mattress topper (half a queen-size) possibly work in this situation? Would investing in tatami for the whole thing actually help? Any recommendations otherwise?

TIA!