u/green-blues

I’m dying to know this. Are social cues intentional? For example when someone complains about something they’re moving being too heavy and hard to move. Are they intentionally trying to hint that they need help?

Same with people venting about having a long day and that they’re tired and don’t want to cook. Are they just complaining but not thinking about the fact that you could help them, or do they understand they’re hinting something and are hoping you will help them?

Additionally if you’re on the other end of this, are you offering to help or helping them because you want to? Or you realize they’re hinting at you to do you do it.

For me, when somebody complains about something that I could help them with easily I get the incentive to and will help them. I don’t think that they’re asking for help unless they say that.

I am also curious as to why people say “If it’s not a bother can you do xyz” or “I hope I am not bothering you,” Do they actually think they’re bothering me? This happens a lot when I am volunteering. A new manager who works there, whenever she asks me to do something she will say she hopes she’s not bothering me or inconveniencing me. She does this with other volunteers too. I just don’t understand this though. I am volunteering because I would like to, I shouldn’t and wouldn’t be volunteering if I do not want to help and am bothered by these requests.

I generally am considered good with social cues, but sometimes I just don’t understand. Especially when they don’t make sense to me, when someone’s behavior is unusual or illogical I will notice it immediately. Specifically when with my family I will ask about why they’re doing x.

(FYI I am autistic teen and have ADHD)

I can never feel calm anymore. My heart rate is very noticeable to me, my back feels too warm and like I have a second heartbeat there. I can’t ever relax and feel quiet because I have all of these sensations going on at once.

Concerta doesn’t work at all for me either no benefits. Psychiatrist won’t switch medications unless I fully max out the dose. I will be on 72mg by Friday, but it’s already so uncomfortable I just want it to all stop and this to be over with.

The other day I had my dinner made in front of me but I was way too focused on what I was researching to put down my phone. I reheated my dinner at least 3 times because it kept getting cold, It took me an hour to eat it. This was when I was hungry, I feel like Concerta hasn’t helped me initiate any of my tasks, it’s only made me very focused and even more stuck than I was before.

On 18mg Concerta feels like it does nothing and 36mg isn’t helping. The problem is my psychiatrist wants me to keep taking the medication all the way through up to 72mg until we decide another medication, but I don’t want to do that. I already am barely eating at all, food is even more uninteresting and nothing sounds good. I am autistic too if that is helpful.

On Monday he wants me to increase my dose to 54mg if it still isn’t working or helping before our appointment together. I really don’t want to, but I feel like it’s the only way to convince him to switch my medication.

If a patient in an emergency room is yelling or causing a ruckus, are they restrained or given medication to calm them down? Where I am from chemical restrains are used on patients who are sometimes just disruptive. If someone is yelling or crying loudly they will bring over security guards. Nurses will also exaggerate patient’s behavior so the doctor orders chemical restraints. If a patient hurts themselves or threatens it’s treated as a liability.

Someone posing an imminent risk to themselves or others and as a last resort is how it’s written down and supposed to go, but that’s definitely not in practice. Since hospitals and mental hospitals are for profit the only time they’re more careful and use deescalation is with elderly patients, because restraining them physically and chemically can result in serious injuries. I’ve had traumatizing experiences here first hand and second hand because of this.

Wondering how your hospitals are trained to handle mentally ill patients and if chemical restrains are used as loosely?

I am planning to go when I am in junior (11th) or senior (12th) year of highschool to go on an exchange year through Rotary Youth Exchange. However, both my parents are reluctant to let me go to Brazil.

How safe is it for a teenage girl during the day and night in a middle to upper-class area? How can I stay safe in Brazil if I do go? I will live with 2-3 host families throughout a 10 month period. I will most likely not be put in a big city, since rotary tries matching you up with a population similar to your own.

The main concerns of my parents are trafficking, gangs, and worst case scenario: me being murdered. I just don’t think that any of that is likely to happen. Since many people go to Brazil on a rotary exchange. We have an outbound student this year from our district that went to Brazil. I could meet up with her and learn more about her experience??

TW: misogyny

My step-dad often makes misogynistic comments. Recently more than usual. Yesterday we were watching a show and he said, (paraphrasing) “Don’t you think if the show was all men most of these problems wouldn’t have happened?”

I instantly told him, “No, that’s misogynistic.” He backpedaled and said it was a joke, a classic shrödinger’s joke. Except later he brought it up again saying it’s the writers fault for making it that way. I again told him it was misogynistic as there is an equal (if not almost) amount of foolish things done by each gender. I don’t understand how he might’ve noticed or thought that—if he wasn’t already looking for it.

Forward to today, we get into another debate. I was saying that most people find men funnier than women, even if that isn’t true and has been proved to not be. He looked at me and looked as if he was trying to soften the blow, he clearly disagreed but didn’t know how to say it. I told him that is because of misogyny, most people have a societal bias that is because of the patriarchal society we live in. We all have biases and even women can perpetuate misogyny, even me. Somehow, his counter argument to this was to ask if it’s racist to say that black people commit the majority of crimes in America. I told him that’s different, as the majority of people using that argument are trying to justify their prejudice against black people.

I tried to then explain the standpoint theory (People in marginalized or minority positions actually have a more complete view of society than people in dominant positions) to him: he wouldn’t understand the patriarchy as much as a woman/girl because he is a man. He said that’s sexist, I don’t see how. If he said “A female won’t understand what a male body feels like,” that wouldn’t be sexist as someone who is afab most times would not understand. He kept interrupting me the whole time though, right when I began to respond to one of his questions he would ask another one before I could finish. The conversation went so all over the place—with me never getting my point across. It became hard for me to speak, I felt like crying. I’m not very articulate out loud, he most likely felt he could interrupt me because I’m a child. I was just very stressed out. My voice was starting to shake and my face was twitching involuntarily. I had to leave the room because of it and my mom and him seemed surprised.

He also kept saying he wasn’t trying to start an argument, I then asked him why he was incessantly asking questions if he wasn’t trying to start an argument. He then said he was just trying to ‘understand’, except he wouldn’t let me speak without interruption.