u/hailasushi

very bizzare.

two years back I was on this dating app where there was a meme based match making and found this guy. he was very cute and respectful and we hit it off instantly. but i soon found out that our humour level and niche meme references are not at par with eachother. he got angry because I said that he gave me "golden retriever" energy and thought i was calling him a dog derogatorily. i tried to explain but he felt insulted.

anyway, i was quick to accept and apologise and then decided to just part ways because i felt a brain rot gap was quite weird to have on a site where it was strictly meme based match making.

we talked on a call before that. only once. for an hour. it was great.

soon after I said goodbye i deleted my account and the app and moved on. two months later i found my now SP.

now I have been manifesting my SP for a long while now.

idk why but I just opened my LinkedIn and found this message. i recognised it was him cus we both knew each other's names and how we looked. we talked. then he asked what i was up doing and if i was seeing someone. then asked for my number to switch to text.

is this a sign omg? cus I'm literally surprised.

please help. same as the name

INDIAN CONSUMER LAW FOR A COMMON MAN, Sree Krishna Seelam.

https://play.google.com/store/books/details?id=MJeQEQAAQBAJ

i was one of the editors of the book. it's by an NGO. it was published almost a year back and back then it was available on Amazon and I save it on my Kindle but then it's gone completely from Amazon and Kindle but I found it from Google books and now I can't download it. i want to preserve it but I can't do that, please help. I reached out to the author as well but he did not respond that I think he is actively ghosting me.

taken at 4pm, can you believe? anyway, khub bhijechi, now i have jor, but that's okay, ig!

west bengal day bole Saturday university jete hocche???

next din yoga day bole Sunday teo university jete hoche??

era ki bhabe students der!

i finished an apprenticeship or the book of pleasures and what stayed with me was how much of lóri’s inner life is shaped by an absence she keeps trying to fill.

what makes the novel so interesting is that even when we are inside lóri’s own stream of consciousness, her thoughts rarely feel completely free. she constantly edits herself, corrects herself, observes herself from the outside. it feels like she is performing even in solitude. there is always an imagined gaze present, especially ulisses’ gaze.

her desire for validation slowly becomes the force organizing her actions. she tries to become someone worthy of being seen, understood, loved. the search for love becomes tied to the search for permission to exist. she keeps outsourcing her sense of self, looking for confirmation of her own being through another person.

in lacanian terms, lóri struggles to place herself outside the position of the objet petit a, the unattainable object around which desire circulates. she is constantly reaching toward something she imagines ulisses possesses: completion, certainty, a way to finally become whole.

lispector captures this psychological movement with incredible precision. the prose feels intimate because it exposes the mind while it is still negotiating with itself. lóri’s thoughts are vulnerable, but they are also controlled, shaped by the desire to be desired.

the book is strange because it treats love less like a destination and more like a confrontation with the self. lóri’s journey is not only about finding another person; it is about discovering how much of herself she has placed in the hands of another.

10/10

here's a small collection, i am an absolute beginner

samskara by ananthamurthy

so far great, can already feel the critique against bramhinical hegemony incoming lol

the novel examines how rigid religious rules can restrict individual freedom and suppress critical thinking. it highlights the gap between idealized notions of purity and the complexities of real human behavior. through its characters, the text challenges the assumption that social status or ritual knowledge automatically confers moral superiority. by exposing tensions within an orthodox community, samskara encourages readers to reflect on issues of caste, identity, tradition, and the need for social and ethical reform.

did not complete yet, but I'm looking forward to it.

wuthering heights was amazing, without a doubt

but vijay tendulkar....ah I had high hopes. genuinely did. this was like an Indian retelling of Pirandello's Six Characters and Brecht's The Good Person, so very meta theatre and absurd. the characters are overly stretched and stereotyped (kinda the point, i understand).

wuthering heights: 9.5/10

silence! the court is in session: 3.5/10