Tales from the Bay Area
Rant/Slice of Life Post
My time on the VATSIM network has slowed drastically since my daughter was born but I still enjoy taking refuge in my office, opening the five or six applications needed to sim, and larping as a pilot for 1-2 hours at a time. I’m a norrowbody bro since life likes to intervene and I find that the shorter hops work with my schedule a lot better as I’m sure many of you do.
Since my time is limited-I ONLY seek out routes offering coverage on the network or at least at the destination as I find the arrival and approach is really where the money is made from an immersion perspective. I even had Claude vibe-code a web app that shows a US map with B, C, and D airports with a layer showing VATSIM coverage. This same web app uses a database (albeit, an outdated one) of IRL routes and their corresponding aircraft types so I can more accurately source a route and make sure it has ATC. But I digress…
I hopped into SFO last night for a boring cruise down to SNA in the B738 (my beloved-tray tables are for wussies /s). Immediately upon entering the fold-boy howdy was the dingus patrol out in full force. I’ll now provide a brief, hopefully numerous recap of the night’s events.
I loaded into the Bravo gates and began my setup. ACARS tells me to call for push so I do but I’m told a Lufthansa A340 is about to push and to wait for him (?). Why he’s at the Bravo gates off of Yankee-the world will never know. He can’t get stuff to work, “there’s a bug!” he pleads. And I’m just sitting at my computer twiddling my thumbs wondering if I’ll get to fly. The baby monitor next to me shows my daughter slumbering away and I’m praying it stays that way for the next hour so I can get this done. Ultimately-he disconnects with his four hair dryer engines tucked between his legs.
Finally-I get to leave. Taxi is uneventful but people have forgotten how a simplex (duplex?) radio system works. The stepping-on is diabolical. I can hear the controller banging his head against his monitor as every other call requires a repeat since someone steps on someone else. Even better-someone joins the frequency and doesn’t wait a beat before asking for something causing a disorganized train of calls and responses to make sure everyone is attended to on both sides of the controller-pilot relationship. Finally-it’s my turn to go.
Airborne-I’m handed off to departure. I switch frequencies and begin to listen in on one of the most bizarre exchanges I’ve heard in recent memory. Nor Cal is telling an Air Canada flight to go direct DEDHD (?) and the gentlemen flying gives the read back as “direct Dead Hotel Delta”. The controller’s interest is piqued-“direct Dead Head-why are you saying it like that?” The pylote tells him, shakily, that “he doesn’t want to say that word” and repeats his nonstandard read back featuring NATO’s finest. I’m almost positive everyone listening to this had the same scrunched up look on their face that I did. The controller tells him to chill, that it’s a band local to the area and the kid says “ok haha” with a nervous trill.
Anyways-the rest of the flight was uneventful. Managed to plant it into SNA with one of my better landings and vacated promptly. Good times.
VATSIM never fails to disappoint. I’ve recently crossed 1000 hours on the network and feel like my knowledge and skills have grown quite a bit.
My FAA medical is going to be quite the uphill battle (ADHD diagnosis and such) so it’ll be the virtual skies for me for a while.
Keep the blue side up gang-smooth skies and tailwinds.
Tl;dr VATSIM is a wondrous place full of interesting characters.