u/i_fyla

This wont be a typical post. Idk about others but I hate the idea of putting my whole identity details and limiting it to a catagory with labels, for strangers to see like a product. But I do want to look for someone now.

I'll describe just enough for anyone who might think we could align can text. I'm calm, emotionally intelligent, and try to keep my creative side alive even though I'm in IT which is a pretty dry field. Working on my faith(I'm sunni) and building my connection with Allah along the way. I'd like to get married within one to two years. I do have a stable job and doing fine career wise.

You may ask me any questions I'll answer it for you if its appropriate.

Age is 24, profession is DevOps Engineer, I'm single(never married). Education is BS CS. I'm from Faisalabad.

Hope this post goes through I think I've provided sufficient info.

I'm 24, a guy, employed. I work during the day and get some time to myself after 7PM.

The thing is, i feel too emotionally numb and never ever like any girl i talk to, even if they're apparently good in terms of whats considered attractive usually.

At the same time, I have this such intense urge to love someone, at times it gets to a point where it hurts my chest while thoughts about it cross my mind. Why do i have such a strong desire to love someone when I cant even bring myself to like someone?

My nephew is 2 now. While playing with him today, I remembered how she once told me she held him too, when my family went to her place for rishta meeting. Just held my little guy and kissed him while missing her:) (things never worked out)

I had nine holidays during eid. Its monday morning now and i cannot sleep because grief decided to visit me the night before my work resumes👍

Theres so much left unsaid behind and i fear its rotting me to the core

Been receiving texts every day since a week from someone i shouldn't. As that door has closed some time ago, they were the one to forcefully close it. Throughout the week I didn't reply but tonight my anxiety didn't let me stay back and now iam even more f*cked than i thought i could be.

Why do they keep coming back? cant they just leave us alone to be at peace???? Especially that they were the ones that chose it for themselves