Shes unsure if she's found a dealbreaker.
We've been together over 2 years. Not a single fight, just one short, mature and calm disagreement. We agree on practically everything in life and our values; it's been the most positive, fun, healthy, and fulfilling experience of my life. She recently asked for my ring size and an inspo board. We're both saving up money to buy a house together.
Then on Friday, she broke down and said she doesn't know if she can continue.
The one thing we disagree on is diet choices. She's been a vegetarian for over a decade, I used to be but stopped. I have been told by several medical professionals and 2 therapists that I should never be on any restrictive kind of diet due to my history of ED, OCD, autoimmune disorders, and other issues. She knows this. She has never dated a non-veg person before and thought she could handle it, but not she isn't sure anymore.
I told her I would be as respectful as possible and eat most vegetarian if we lived together, but I could not promise to cut it off altogether. If anything, I'd have one special pan I'd cook meat in and only when she wasn't home. If I do eat meat, I floss and brush my teeth before I kiss or touch her. I try to be respectful. I love how dedicated she is to animals and her lifestyle. She doesn't think she can even handle that, she can't stomach the idea of me eating meat ever anymore.
She doesn't expect me to change for her, but she secretly was hoping she'd influence me and I would change.
I feel so blindsighted. It took over 2.5 years of knowing each other for her to come to this realization now? I know she's going through a really rough mental place right now and she said she thinks that's why this is all coming to light, and I feel bad for her suffering. I do. But it just feels like I was.. lied to in a way. I thought she was okay with it. She was always supportive "babe, eat what you want! I'll get my vegetarian dish and you get whatever" but now I feel like it was all lies to pacify things. Which I hate because I feel she was uncomfortable and didn't speak up when I asked if she was sure she was okay with this one difference between us for so long.
She's now deciding if this is a dealbreaker for her while she starts therapy next week and works through things for the foreseeable future. I 100% support her starting therapy and have been encouraging it for quite some time. However, I feel like I'm just strung along and waiting to be broken up with for the foreseeable future.
Not to mention my son is so attached to her. He talks about all living together as a big family and how she's his favorite person in the world. He would be so devastated if we broke up.
I'm so broken hearted. Part of me feels like we should just end things while she works on herself so that way I don't get strung along and she isn't stuck with someone who has a lifestyle she abhors. Then again, it feels so silly to end a relationship that's otherwise healthy and stable besides this one thing.
I'll. Probably delete this later. I have only told 1 friend because I'm so ashamed to tell anybody else, we've been literally perfect up to this point - literally everybody says they adore us as a couple and we've perfect, when's the wedding etc - and I hate admitting we've lost that. I'm just bawling and had to put my feelings out somewhere.