u/jangal

this is mostly a rant because I feel like I have no other choice but accept this.

I have lived in Istanbul for many years but I moved away around 10 years ago. well, the drivers haven’t gotten politer.

in fact I just had a man (I am a short woman btw) willingly drive towards me while I was crossing a zebra crossing. he saw me. he didn’t stop and almost hit me. he stopped on the very last milisecond and then gave me a sign that I should cross, he was PISSED.

in fact I should’ve been the one who is pissed and he should’ve been sorry. but no, he was pissed. how dare I, a pedestrian, walk on zebra crossing, while he wastes 2 seconds of his life. how dare I? I was in a state of shock for a few seconds and couldn’t process the aggressiveness of it all.

every time I think of maybe moving back, I experience sth like this and then I think Istanbul is not for me. this is unfortunately not a single event. i had a man push me in metrobus aggressively couple of days ago because he wanted to sit on the seat I was in front of. as I said, I am a short woman, not that his behavior would have been justified if I was a man..

anyway, I don’t know why I am posting this, maybe just to rant, maybe to see what others think. how do you deal with these situations? does this also happen to men or are these men only brave enough to treat women like this?

I’m a 35yo woman who studied and has been working as a UX designer since 8 years. with AI, I feel like the toxic work environement got even worse, and I am tired of designing for screens.

But I obviously I need to earn money.

I have been thinking of becoming a therapist however I live in Germany (as a foreigner!) and they made it incredibly hard to study and practice psychotherapy. It seems out of reach.

I don’t want to keep learning the new design tools, I am tired of tech, also I’m feeling I am already getting too old for a career that goes for 20 year old energetic people who don’t have a family. I don’t want to use AI daily, I want to help people, I want to learn new useful things. I thought psychology and therapy would be the perfect match for this.

Does anyone have an idea where I go to next? Any tips, thoughts, experience shares etc would be incredibly appreciated. 

Hi, so I (35 years old now) studied graphic design on my bachelor and master, found a job at graphic design, first in an agency then a real big consulting company and now I am designing an app for a startup. I have been working since 8 years full time. 

The company is not doing well so there might be a job loss in sight (not for sure) but even if the company was doing well, I have been working here since 6 years and haven’t had a real promotion or salary raise.

However, in general now with AI, my job description is changing. I don’t like the way things are developing, I used to love design but now it’s about how you can write prompts and also I hate big tech and apps and websites and anything screen related.

I would love to learn something new, I love psychology and I thought of changing to being a therapist because you can help someone directly and I find it interesting too. But in Germany where I live, this is a super hard study path and in the end the pay is not great. I’d be happy to work in an NGO but in Germany you have study everything, you don’t get to just work in an NGO. I’d like to be an art teacher but I am not good enough and again in Germany it’s hard to do this without studying or learning for it. I also like tourism, languages etc. but I don’t know what field makes sense to try since I am already 35 and don’t know how to do such a big change without making sure I won’t regret it. Studying from scratch would be bad financially. 

I am so lost. I’d appreciate any help and ideas and experience shares.

Hi, so I (35 years old now) studied graphic design on my bachelor and master, found a job at graphic design, first in an agency then a real big consulting company and now I am designing an app for a startup. I have been working since 8 years full time. 

The company is not doing well so there might be a job loss in sight (not for sure) but even if the company was doing well, I have been working here since 6 years and haven’t had a real promotion or salary raise.

However, in general now with AI, my job description is changing. I don’t like the way things are developing, I used to love design but now it’s about how you can write prompts and also I hate big tech and apps and websites and anything screen related.

I would love to learn something new, I love psychology and I thought of changing to being a therapist because you can help someone directly and I find it interesting too. But in Germany where I live, this is a super hard study path and in the end the pay is not great. I’d be happy to work in an NGO but in Germany you have study everything, you don’t get to just work in an NGO. I’d like to be an art teacher but I am not good enough and again in Germany it’s hard to do this without studying or learning for it. I also like tourism, languages etc. but I don’t know what field makes sense to try since I am already 35 and don’t know how to do such a big change without making sure I won’t regret it. Studying from scratch would be bad financially. 

I am so lost. I’d appreciate any help and ideas and experience shares.

I have a good friend who is really nice and is always there when I need her, so I really do appreciate the friendship and don't want to lose it.

But everytime we meet I get bothered by our time together. She asks me a question, and while I answer she keeps looking at everything behind me, but not at me. It feels like she is bored and doesn't want to listen, and she keeps saying "uh-uh" while I talk.

This makes me not want to tell her anything about myself.

When she talks and explains stuff, she is super engaged and looks at me in my eyes.

What do I do about this? Am I overreacting for being bothered by this?

I went to the lung doctor because I somehow have a feeling my chest is tight and I can not breathe properly.

They did the breathing test, and then told me my lung capacity is pretty good, 90%, but I do have asthma. Gave me a spray I need to use twice a day, and another appointment in 6 months to see if anything improved.

For 6 months I used my spray twice a day, and today I went back in there to say I don't notice any improvement with my tight chest feeling and still have issues breathing when doing sports.

Now they added a pill.

I do not understand this, if I already have a great lung capacity an the spray doesn't help me at all, why keep it?

The worst part: the doctor was too busy so his helper talked me instead of the doctor because to them this is simple stuff, so I couldn't ask him my questions.

I have to keep using the spray, the new pill and 6 months later will have another appointment.

Is this normal?

Btw I am 35, f, and never had an asthma attack or big issues with breathing.