u/journeymylife

Since, I got my first powerful Smartphone at 23, a Microsoft Lumia. I developed a bad habit of doom scrolling. At that time it was Youtube, where I would spend an average of three hours per day watching video after video.Then came Tiktok with doom scrolling and this made everything worst as other platforms such as Facebook, Instagram and Youtube started using it.

I think the main reason I used doom scrolling was to numb my brain as I used to have Limerence and felt extremely lonely. But what makes doom scrolling worst than other addictions like alcohol is that a phone is always with me and cost almost nothing with unlimited data packages.

The cure:

First, I overcame Limerence

Second, I started Reading a book on AI which was difficult at the start, however, I forced myself to push through by setting a goal of 20 pages a day. As I read, I started to takes notes on anything that peaked my interest and at the end of the book, I feel more knowledgeable and had a better understanding of AI.

However, in between I still doom scrolled but the difference now was that my mind was sub consciously starting to hate AI generated content and become fed up as I began to see more and more of it as unwanted noise polluting the feed, until I snapped and started blocking any advertiser who used AI generated images or videos in businesses like retail stores, education, hair salons etc. Any business that could easily create real content, but chose to be lazy turned me off.

Now, when I open social media, it is only to check on notifications or content from people I know in person and professionals who never use AI content as they have a solid reputation and don't need to fake anything or prove who they are.

As for reading, I have killed boredom in life, if I am waiting for a meeting to start or anywhere I have to wait, I read in between and now it's an average of 33 per day. On a lazy day I read about a 170 pages.My library is also slowly growing with PDF and EPUB books, most of which have hand written notes, I scan, convert to PDF and attach to the book.

With regards to time, my perception is this "Social Media KILLS TIME, whereas Reading USES TIME to ENHANCE the MIND".

Regarding the device, I use it's an old Samsung 8 inch Tablet that runs for a day with the screen continuously on. I will definitely purchase an E-ink device as Reading is something I now enjoy, especially the feeling at the end of the day where I feel like I made some progress unlike doom scrolling that made me feel hopeless and depressed.

One last important point, I nearly forgot to mention: Reading has helped me take control over certain aspects of my life, people and even helped me find answers to questions I had for years. It is truly amazing how spending a few hours reading can have such a profound impact in life.

Since, I got my first powerful Smartphone at 23, a Microsoft Lumia. I developed a bad habit of doom scrolling. At that time it was Youtube, where I would spend an average of three hours per day watching video after video.Then came Tiktok with doom scrolling and this made everything worst as other platforms such as Facebook, Instagram and Youtube started using it.

I think the main reason I used doom scrolling was to numb my brain as I used to have Limerence and felt extremely lonely. But what makes doom scrolling worst than other addictions like alcohol is that a phone is always with me and cost almost nothing with unlimited data packages.

The cure:

First, I overcame Limerence

Second, I started Reading a book on AI which was difficult at the start, however, I forced myself to push through by setting a goal of 20 pages a day. As I read, I started to takes notes on anything that peaked my interest and at the end of the book, I feel more knowledgeable and had a better understanding of AI.

However, in between I still doom scrolled but the difference now was that my mind was sub consciously starting to hate AI generated content and become fed up as I began to see more and more of it as unwanted noise polluting the feed, until I snapped and started blocking any advertiser who used AI generated images or videos in businesses like retail stores, education, hair salons etc. Any business that could easily create real content, but chose to be lazy turned me off.

Now, when I open social media, it is only to check on notifications or content from people I know in person and professionals who never use AI content as they have a solid reputation and don't need to fake anything or prove who they are.

As for reading, I have killed boredom in life, if I am waiting for a meeting to start or anywhere I have to wait, I read in between and now it's an average of 33 per day. On a lazy day I read about a 170 pages.My library is also slowly growing with PDF and EPUB books, most of which have hand written notes, I scan, convert to PDF and attach to the book.

With regards to time, my perception is this "Social Media KILLS TIME, whereas Reading USES TIME to ENHANCE the MIND".

Regarding the device, I use it's an old Samsung 8 inch Tablet that runs for a day with the screen continuously on. I will definitely purchase an E-ink device as Reading is something I now enjoy, especially the feeling at the end of the day where I feel like I made some progress unlike doom scrolling that made me feel hopeless and depressed.

One last important point, I nearly forgot to mention: Reading has helped me take control over certain aspects of my life, people and even helped me find answers to questions I had for years. It is truly amazing how spending a few hours reading can have such a profound impact in life.

This is a post about the type of Christian women I used to desire for a marriage partner (which never happened because I am 31 and still single) from my heart and soul when I was a Christian Protestant. However, I eventually quit Christianity and as for why that is something I have written about titled "Why I left Christianity, the trauma I endured most of my life".

The reason I am posting this now, is to share my desires before I forget one day what my dream used to be as move further and further away from Christianity and memories slowly fade as I gradually change my lifestyle. I don't know what I believe anymore.

Anyway, the dream Christian Marriage I used to envision was like this;

Bible: We will read the Bible together everyday at night

Pray: We will pray together and for each other to grow stronger and closer together in God's Love, Grace and Strength

Worship: One of us will learn to play the Guitar and sing songs worshiping the Lord together.

Church: We will go to Church every Sunday and take notes on what the pastor is preachingWe will live a Godly life according to the word of God and trust each other completely, being loyal to each other.

Spreading the Word: We will write about God's word, make music and aim to help those who are lost and drifting away from the Lord. COMMENT: weird, I never imagined at the time that I would be the one who drift away.

Divorce: We will never divorce and seek advice from the elders of the Church or Christian counselors and fix work out any issues we have.

Love: We will love one another and respect each other and put God first in everything, trusting him and seeking his guidance to move forward to make major decisions.

NOTE: I used to be able to sing well and knew many Christian worship songs by heart and had a beautiful voice. Now, I have forgotten everything and haven't sung for years.

As I write this post, I hear a the lyrics to a song "Precious Memories, how they linger, how they..." in my mind and that's all that keeps playing, I don't remember anything else about this song.

I grew in a Christian family, was baptized which I will admit I was forced into as I felt uncomfortable doing it in that particular church due to traumatic memories,

PS: if you feel like removing this post from this Christian Subreddit, go ahead, I am used to getting rejected by Christians (which is one of the reasons I left) and and will just post it on a non or anti Christian Subreddit instead.

​

I accidentally deleted the original post, so, after adding some new information I missed and changing part of the title to make the post more relevant, I am re-posting this. Some parts are the same, so bear with me.

Budgeting is very important from a financial perspective, but what if you could spend as much as you wanted to? This was exactly my case, until I learned the hard way on how important it is to maintain a budget to stay healthy.

The first problem with a no budget approach is the tendency to overeat and put on weight, in my case it was over 10kg in just a few months.

The second problem is being able to fit in properly into tailored suits, which with me resulted myself not being able to wear a waistcoat for a few months.

My solution was simple, the first thing I did was switch to OMAD (One Meal A Day) which consisted of eating over a kilogram of food in one meal consisting of meat, vegetable etc. This meant spending less on just one meal instead of three a day, reducing expenses.

Secondly, I started fasting once a week for 48 hours, only drinking water. This meant eating only for five days, instead of seven. The result was a natural detox as well my mind becoming sharp at the 35th hour almost as if I was gaining some kind of super-power.

Overall, I now eat only five meals a week instead of 21 before. Furthermore, I have a strict defined amount set for the Food Budget, which forces me to think twice before consuming more than one ice-cream, sweets or even fast food.

Since, I have adopted this method, my weight has decreased after months which was also a combination exercising and only eating certain low caloric foods, however, after my weight reduced 74kg, I switched back to my normal balanced diet but with OMAD and now my weight stays between 74kg to 76kg where my belly is flat and my four pack abs are finally visible again. Furthermore, my tailored three-piece-suit fits perfectly well on me.

Another huge benefit of OMAD and the weekly fasting is that in a crisis situation where food is not readily available, I can easily survive for 48 hours and then use MRE or Canned food to survive. Whereas, people who depend on three meals a day will suffer as their bodies have not not gotten the chance to slowly adjust to fasting. Which I did incrementally by staring the stopwatch on my Casio World TImer and gradually increasing the time over several weeks.

I will admit, that I failed OMAD and fasting during the first three weeks when I first started out but with shear will power I gradually overcame the temptation and hunger pangs to get to where I am now.

As to how I feel, well, I feel good, healthy, strong and have learned how much to eat in one meal. The key is quantity, for me about 1.2kg works well, but on some days I increase the quantity to 1.5kg. One last benefit I didn't mention is that OMAD saves time.

Critics, however, argue and say that three meals a day are necessary, however, I see no benefit, in-fact, I strongly feel that apart from unnecessary time being consumed, the body does not have enough time to digest everything and results in a lot of unwanted stored energy.

Furthermore, just like dirty pipes that need cleaning, OMAD and fasting do exactly that, converting unwanted fat and trash into energy.

Finally, the best part is that I can eat anything without worrying about calorie intake and feel free.

I have come to a point in life where I am so confused that I don't know where to turn to anymore.

Every time, I meet someone nice on a dating app, we have a wonderful chat or even a call and everything is going well, when suddenly I am cut off without warning, or any indication that anything is wrong.

Here are some examples where this happened;

Indonesian: An Indonesian matched with me and we had a long chat where she laughed and was happy for several hours where we exchanged Instagram in my case, I have a public profile with videos of me promoting luxury assets. I shared my profile and she found me admirable and was trying to be polite, and apologizing. I reassured her that she can talk to me normally.

Towards nightfall, she called me on Instagram and before I could close the dating app open the app and call her on Instagram, she blocked me from everything.

Brazilian: An Asexual Brazilian, where for over a week we had video calls and chats, until I shared an Instagram reel of a cute parrot next to a flower. She blocked em me without saying a word. Before, this we shared different food we liked etc and everything was going well

French: We spoke for 11 hours on a call, the next day we added each other on Facebook and she started ordering me to remove other women who were past colleagues or friends. I removed two because, we haven't spoken for a decade and when she asked me to remove every women and I hesitated she said "your just like other men" and blocked me.

Egyptian: For two days everything was going well until she went to a psychiatrist who told her not to get into a relationship, when she told me, I told her I understand and until she recovers we can be friends. She said can't and blocked me.

German: Three days, same story everything going well and suddenly in the middle of a conversation like an ambush "I don't this will will work out".

These are just a few examples, but the pattern is the same. Everything is going well and suddenly I get ambushed and cut off withing sixty seconds. I have read the book "Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders IV", Instagram reels on dating, spoken to Gemini Ai and I still cannot figure out what is going on.

What causes a women to suddenly go from being happy to just ambushing me without warning? Over and over again?It's also made ask myself this question. If a women can cut me off in the blink of an eye, what guarantee is there where if I get married, one night it will be a romantic date and when I wake it will be divorce papers next to the bed?

What exactly is the trigger that causes a women to brutally cut me off without even trying to talk about it or saying anything? I would appreciate any insights into solving this recurring problem

I am 31 now, and someone used to be a true devout Christian who was appointed to to preach God's word in the Christian group in school (extra curricular activities) before but over the years became more and more frustrated until I snapped and just quit Christianity.

However, one thing that has bothered me since I was a teenager is the shear Hypocrisy among Christians which is what this post will dive into. Please note that I can't speak for other religions as I have never read any of their Holy Books and know very little to judge them by.

To begin with, I have always wondered why most people chose to be a Christian, because they take what is written in the Bible and twist it so much that it becomes a literal contradiction despite going to Church, listening to sermons, Bible studies, fellowship etc.

Here are a few examples, I have seen based on experience;

1. Wine: In the Bible it says "wine that gladdens human hearts", "drink your wine with a joyful heart" and even the first miracle performed by Jesus about turning water into Wine. However, Christians in Asia are against drinking it and I certainly was criticized a lot saying that I would go to hell.

2. Focused on being missionaries and spreading God's word to the world, yet, not caring about existing Christians.

When I was a Christian and I desperately needed emotional support or when I was having a problem, it was Muslims who understood my pain, took me into the Desert and took their time to help me overcome Limerence and we became very good friends. Meanwhile, the Church criticized me saying "God's will" and at the time when I needed someone to talk to the most, I was brutally cut off and only had Muslim friends who acted like real Christians showing kindness and patient and they did not care that I was a Non-Muslim, they saw me as someone who was hurting and in pain. They never tried to convert me and many times shared food they cooked, Orange juice etc

Another instance was where I had a Muslim colleague who was married, yet, unlike with a Christian who is concerned if his wife is alone with a another man going to a event, a walk in a park. If her husband called her she would say I am with <my name> and that's it. Her husband trusted me and her so much that nothing would happen between us. This was mind blowing to me, because with Christians husbands there was this fear that if a man and women are alone in a place something intimate will happen. when I asked other Muslims I knew, they said "we all know your a good person, so, what's so wrong about you being friends". When I heard this I felt honored and have deep sense of respect towards Muslims because of the respect and trust they have shown me.

3. Matriarchy: Some Christians in order to justify being in a Female Led Relationship say that they know about the verse "Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord." yet, deliberately chose to ignore this because "we are living in modern times" and that time was a male dominated society. Question: who gave anyone the right to justify this?

4. Being Holy on Sunday during Church, yet, acting like a jerk outside Church. Cursing, criticizing, jealously and even stealing from one another, lusting over other peoples wives, talking about what pornography they watched. Seriously! Why even be a Christian in the first place.

5. Dress Code: Most Christian women don't dress Modestly.

6. Status symbol: Church is supposed to be about God, yet, in reality it's all about expensive clothing, showing off your car and status symbol. One example, is when I cam back to my country of origin and reluctantly went to a Carol Service because I mom had not seen me for over a year. The first question I was asked in Church was NOT "How are you?" instead "what are you doing now?". My mind went blank, I was thinking, the first question you ask is about my job? Then to put him in place, I told the truth to make him feel inferior, which I felt bad about doing as I treat everyone regardless of who they are with respect.

7. Worrying and Panicking. On one side Christians talk about praying, faith and how powerful God is, yet, the moment they face a problem they panic as if everything said they believed in was a lie.

8. Gossiping and Jealously: Tell a Christian to pray for you and that news will spread like Wild Fire. Tell, a Christian you archived something and you will get nothing but jealously. Meanwhile, once when I showed a bit a jealously, my Muslim friends advised me and told me that what I was feeling was very bad and how I should be happy when someone succeeds, because we all want each other to grow and improve.

Overall, I have to come a point where anyone who practices what they believe is someone I have the utmost respect towards like my Muslim friends who after spending months with them, have seen how everything they told me about what they believe they put into practice. I have never seen them deviating or trying to justify their actions.

As a non-religious person, I believe that if you claim to be a Christian or something else, then your actions should be a reflection of that. Because, no one is a fool and people notice when you become a hypocrite.

When I was a Christian, I was 100% in and committed. When I left, I openly said I am an Atheist and was a 100% out.

After writing this post, one Redditor accused of "propaganda" and phobia and politics. So, here are some answers.

Point 3 and Point 5: According to the Bible, it's wrong, that's a fact. My opinion is, how someone wants to live there life or dress is their choice.

Politics and Propaganda: this post is merely an observation and experience. My story. In no way is it meant for some agenda.

Budgeting is important from a financial perspective, but what if you could spend as much as you wanted to. This was exactly my case, until I learned the hard way on how important it is to maintain a budget to stay healthy.

The first problem with a no budget apprach is the tendency to overeat and put on weight, over 10kg in just a few months.

The second problem is being able to fit in properly into tailord suits, which in my case resulted in me not being able to wear a waistcoat for a few months.

My solution was simple, the first thing I did was switch to OMAD (One Meal A Day) which consisted of eating over a kilogram of food in one meal consisting of meat, vegetable etc. This meant spending less on just one meal instead of three a day, reducing expenses.

Secondly, I started fasting once a week for 48 hours, only drinking water helping my body detox. This meant eating only for five days, instead of seven.

Overall, I now eat only five meals a week instead of 21 before. Furthermore, I have a strict defined amount set for the Food Budget, which forces me to think twice before consuming more than one ice-cream, sweets or even fast food.

Since, I have adpoted this method, my weight has decreased after months and now stays constant where my belly is flat and my four pack abs are finally visible again. Furthermore, my tailored three-piece-suit fits perfectly well on me.

As to how I feel, well, I feel good, healthy, strong and have learned how much to eat in one meal. The key is quantity, for me about 1.2kg works well, but on some days I increase the quantity to 1.5kg.

One last benefit I didn't mention is that OMAD saves time.

Budgeting is important from a financial perspective, but what if you could spend as much as you wanted to. This was exactly my case, until I learned the hard way on how important it is to maintain a budget to stay healthy.

The first problem with a no budget apprach is the tendency to overeat and put on weight, over 10kg in just a few months.

The second problem is being able to fit in properly into tailord suits, which in my case resulted in me not being able to wear a waistcoat for a few months.

My solution was simple, the first thing I did was switch to OMAD (One Meal A Day), this meant spending less on just one meal instead of three a day, reducing expenses.

Secondly, I started fasting once a week for 48 hours, only drinking water helping my body detox. This also meant eating only for five days, instead of seven.

Overall, I now eat only five meals a week instead of 21 before. Furthermore, I have a strict defined amount set for the Food Budget, which forces me to think twice before consuming more than one ice-cream, sweets or even fast food.

Since, I have adpoted this method, my weight has decreased after months and now stays constant where my belly is flat and my four pack abs are finally visible again. Furthermore, i am much healthier than I was and my tailored three-piece-suit fits perfectly well on me.